A
Ayloy
Member
- Apr 13, 2023
- 29
I just don't want to deal with it. I want them to view me as worthlessly as I view myself. I want them to not care when I CTB. How the hell do I do this!?
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I've been a burden. They know about the state of my mind & they've only been trying to see me more. I think if I ignore them enough they'd call the cops.try to slowly distance yourself by not responding as much or not showing up as much. but if you want to do it fast make yourself a burden to them and eventually they will not want to associate with you because you drag them down. it's going to be very difficult because they will care, but it just takes time. i wish you the best of luck
This is hard. If they care for you, they would never want you to go. But I think you need to tell them that if they truly care about you they need to let you go. "If you love me, let me gooooooooooo (this is the beat of my heart)" a little song called "This is gospel". That's about drugs, but still.I just don't want to deal with it. I want them to view me as worthlessly as I view myself. I want them to not care when I CTB. How the hell do I do this!?
then i think that making them not care is something that is off the table, I think you should be 100% real with them and tell them what you are going to do and send them the message after your at a hotel or some place where they cant call the cops to you immediately. I think this would be the best course because instead of surprising them with it out of the blue they will know that you are not leaving them without a goodbye making the reaction to your passing less toxic. it is impossible for you to get them to not care at all so trying to get them to accept it would be a solution that would put less stress on you.I've been a burden. They know about the state of my mind & they've only been trying to see me more. I think if I ignore them enough they'd call the cops.
Well, you can try and push them away by being a jerk. However, true friends are going to care regardless, while fake friends will just judge and insult you. If you're having thoughts like this, perhaps you should really do some honest inflection and get clarity on what you're feeling, why you're feeling it, and perhaps another way of handling it. Not saying that you still won't want to ctb, but it sounds like you need some clarity with yourself. Robin Williams was one of the most beloved cultural figures in this society, yet that didn't stop him from going forward with what he did. At some point, you have to look within and get real, honest clarity with yourself and what you want to do. If your friend's care and concern is that important, you may have other options available to you that others don't.I just don't want to deal with it. I want them to view me as worthlessly as I view myself. I want them to not care when I CTB. How the hell do I do this!?