HI! I dislike, in a way to say this just becasue I do not like to get a load of negativity from people here, like to try to see the best in people, now with that said, I would take a step back and think before reacting. Reacting in this way has NO 2nd chances. I 100% know where you are coming from, have been there myself, along time ago but still there, and I would try and figure out what was my "hot key" that set not only me but the whole situation off to begin with. Now, in my case, it was my family in general and they took care of that by kicking me out and never speaking to me again. Now in you case, there in again, I would take a step back, reorganize my thoughts and think. Was it my family, me and situation at the gathering that got the thoughts there in the 1st place??? Go from there. Just, in my sense, punishing ones self before you knew everything might not be a good move. You have been VERY NICE to me in the past on replies and you made me feel good. I for one, do NOT want you to do something rash. I really care for you and just want you to make a sound decision is all. Whatever journey one chooses my wish is for a happy outcome. Love and peace to you my global family member.