Venting Bitching/ Venting Anyone feel that some people are ‘mentally ill’ for NOT wanting to ctb

[MeltingHeart]

To start- I am usually a kind, thoughtful, non-judgemental person (these are just the v.v few good things I can say & know about myself & traits I possess) BUT that said- there a couple of people ( I won't say who) in my life- that proclaim I have a mental illness - due to my desire to end my life- a fact I don't entirely agree with- I believe you can be grief stiken & despairing for many multi faceted reasons - not always due to or entirely because of a 'mental illness' , I have a sense of profound and deep sadness & hopeless- for many reasons including the hopes I had for myself to live a purposeful life with meaning/ moments of joy & sense of self worth can no longer be realised - for many reasons - I can't help but feel that in trying to explain this to certain people it has actually perhaps slightly exposed their own extremely mundane, joyless , & to be quite frank meaningless lives - you'd really have to know them to fully grasp what I mean - even though I will admit it sounds rather heartless of me- in doing say because of own admission that I think life is not worth living - I am met with anger, contempt, snidy remarks, gas lighting & repeatedly told i must have a mental illness - I've met with professionals who hve agreed that despite my constant low mood - I do not have a diagnosable one as such. And yeah I am trying to extricate myself from these people but at present it is not possible. Bitch over. I'm v. rarely bitchy or say anything derogatory about others - but it was just what was on mind . So "Venting" . If my SN hadn't been taken away (yes I was stupid) I wouldn't need to vent as I would hve been gone by now.

 

[justwhy?]

Those people of whom you speak are blessed with mindlessness; humanoid automata, in some circles... "NPCs" !
Conscientiousness is your curse... you gain perspective and insight, at the cost of your own well-being. If they're well into adulthood, well... you remember what Morpheus told Neo?

But... in their defense.... you might have grandiose traits they lack - they might be quite content with living meek lives. It could be argued that eg Buddhist monks' lives are meaningless !

 

[MeltingHeart]

Those people of whom you speak are blessed with mindlessness; humanoid automata, in some circles... "NPCs" !
Conscientiousness is your curse... you gain perspective and insight, at the cost of your own well-being. If they're well into adulthood, well... you remember what Morpheus told Neo?

But... in their defense.... you might have grandiose traits they lack - they might be quite content with living meek lives. It could be argued that eg Buddhist monks' lives are meaningless !

Yes they are into adulthood. Is Morpheus a Greek myth? Feel like
I've heard of it - but will look it up. But even meek monks - do so- I mean live meekly that is- with a purpose - in the sense of gaining or attaining a higher knowledge, sense of being & many do training exercise & things too& they are driven by a meaning (& again purpose they believe in) via their religion & even they socialise with each other (well except the ones that go it alone). But I get what yr saying. Meek is good. Meaningless for me is the pits- unfortunately I feel that is now far beyond my reach so even given all the material things I had wanted, needed or hoped for (very modest ones for me) would not want to stop me ctb.

Yes they are into adulthood. Is Morpheus a Greek myth? Feel like
I've heard of it - but will look it up. But even meek monks - do so- I mean live meekly that is- with a purpose - in the sense of gaining or attaining a higher knowledge, sense of being & many do training exercise & things too& they are driven by a meaning (& again purpose they believe in) via their religion & even they socialise with each other (well except the ones that go it alone). But I get what yr saying. Meek is good. Meaningless for me is the pits- unfortunately I feel that is now far beyond my reach so even given all the material things I had wanted, needed or hoped for (very modest ones for me) would not want to stop me ctb.

Just release its from the matrix ha ha! cant remember what he said @justwhy?

 

[c824767]

To start- I am usually a kind, thoughtful, non-judgemental person (these are just the v.v few good things I can say & know about myself & traits I possess) BUT that said- there a couple of people ( I won't say who) in my life- that proclaim I have a mental illness - due to my desire to end my life- a fact I don't entirely agree with- I believe you can be grief stiken & despairing for many multi faceted reasons - not always due to or entirely because of a 'mental illness' , I have a sense of profound and deep sadness & hopeless- for many reasons including the hopes I had for myself to live a purposeful life with meaning/ moments of joy & sense of self worth can no longer be realised - for many reasons - I can't help but feel that in trying to explain this to certain people it has actually perhaps slightly exposed their own extremely mundane, joyless , & to be quite frank meaningless lives - you'd really have to know them to fully grasp what I mean - even though I will admit it sounds rather heartless of me- in doing say because of own admission that I think life is not worth living - I am met with anger, contempt, snidy remarks, gas lighting & repeatedly told i must have a mental illness - I've met with professionals who hve agreed that despite my constant low mood - I do not have a diagnosable one as such. And yeah I am trying to extricate myself from these people but at present it is not possible. Bitch over. I'm v. rarely bitchy or say anything derogatory about others - but it was just what was on mind . So "Venting" . If my SN hadn't been taken away (yes I was stupid) I wouldn't need to vent as I would hve been gone by now.

I also disagree with my diagnosis although I can understand how a Canadian could come to the conclusion that i am mentally ill, I am from Germany and we just have very different norms about what is acceptable in public. shoulder shrug. I got so bottomlessly suicidal after my diagnosis and when I got out of that bottomless pit I no longer cared. Let them think I am crazy, I just have to roll with the punches. Staying alive is more important for the time being than impressing people with my sanity.

 

[MeltingHeart]

I also disagree with my diagnosis although I can understand how a Canadian could come to the conclusion that i am mentally ill, I am from Germany and we just have very different norms about what is acceptable in public. shoulder shrug. I got so bottomlessly suicidal after my diagnosis and when I got out of that bottomless pit I no longer cared. Let them think I am crazy, I just have to roll with the punches. Staying alive is more important for the time being than impressing people with my sanity.

what was yr diagnosis and why did that make u feel suicidal?