Venting Being the "lesser version" of another person

[yellowsouled]

I have a coworker at my job that looks similar enough to me that both patients and staff confuse us.

She's a decade older than me with a stable relationship and kids (not that I want kids but still). She's very kind and talented. A lot of people compare us looks/personality wise.

I really did think we were Very Much Alike (overly polite, kind of asocial, etc) until it dropped that she's friends with tons of our other coworkers outside of work. Which. Good for her, I like her, but like. Jesus. I feel like the only person here sometimes who doesn't have the # of anyone outside of work. Like the amount of people I've heard here say they speak with x or y off the clock is genuinely starting to bum me out.

It's not like I think anyone DISLIKES me but I don't think anyone LIKES me either, if that makes sense. I mean I already had issues w this job forgetting I existed for a month straight, this is just kinda rubbing it in, lol.

 

[amomentspeace]

I get what you mean. Back in school there was another boy in my class with the same name and country of origin as me, but he was more handsome and extroverted. He never stopped rubbing it on my face (kids being kids). I'm over it now but it was terrible back then. At least I have a job while he's pushing some random crypto pump and dump scheme on social media

 

[WhatCouldHaveBeen32]

I haven't had this happen to me but this just sounds like shitty coworkers, they sound like they have nothing going on in their life and have seen for the same time in their life 2 people that are similar at a surface level.

Also the fact that they don't like you might be a blessing given the way they act. wouldn't be surprised if your older coworker gets stabbed in the back one day. I'd say you should talk to that older coworker, if she is willing to , you can be friends with her, I personally wouldn't see this as being a lesser version of someone , I'd see it as an opportunity to make a friend that is similar to me and might understand me.

 

[amomentspeace]

Sorry, didn't mean to make that post about myself. I hope it's not affecting you too much. You don't need to be friends with your coworkers, especially if you aren't compatible like that.

 

[yellowsouled]

I haven't had this happen to me but this just sounds like shitty coworkers, they sound like they have nothing going on in their life and have seen for the same time in their life 2 people that are similar at a surface level.

Also the fact that they don't like you might be a blessing given the way they act. wouldn't be surprised if your older coworker gets stabbed in the back one day. I'd say you should talk to that older coworker, if she is willing to , you can be friends with her, I personally wouldn't see this as being a lesser version of someone , I'd see it as an opportunity to make a friend that is similar to me and might understand me.

I'm friends with her but in a "work friends" way (the kind of thing where you speak to them on shift, but not off). I thought she was similar but seemingly Not. Not that I dislike her (I actually think this person is pretty cool) but a mild bummer than the person everyone mistakes me for is apparently much more popular (<- albeit I'm aware that wording is juvenile).

 

[TheLastGreySky]

I have a coworker at my job that looks similar enough to me that both patients and staff confuse us.

She's a decade older than me with a stable relationship and kids (not that I want kids but still). She's very kind and talented. A lot of people compare us looks/personality wise.

I really did think we were Very Much Alike (overly polite, kind of asocial, etc) until it dropped that she's friends with tons of our other coworkers outside of work. Which. Good for her, I like her, but like. Jesus. I feel like the only person here sometimes who doesn't have the # of anyone outside of work. Like the amount of people I've heard here say they speak with x or y off the clock is genuinely starting to bum me out.

It's not like I think anyone DISLIKES me but I don't think anyone LIKES me either, if that makes sense. I mean I already had issues w this job forgetting I existed for a month straight, this is just kinda rubbing it in, lol.

You're not the lesser version of anyone. I don't come to work to socialize and I've only ever had coworkers numbers for work related stuff, but I've always been kind of envious of people who are friends even outside of work.
I understand relationship Dynamics and have no problem getting a girlfriend, but when it comes to a regular friend I am fucking clueless and the closest things I've had to friendships never felt real.

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that you are valid Just the Way You Are and you're nobody's lesser.