M

merpmerp

Member
Apr 5, 2020
28
SOs, supposedly good friends.... whats the point. my thoughts of self-hatred are just continuously affirmed by everyone around me

Everything you learn about love and friendship growing up is a fucking joke. Just a way to mock me. A measuring stick for later to confirm that yes. You are less then
 
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SipSop

SipSop

Arcanist
May 7, 2020
483
SOs, supposedly good friends.... whats the point. my thoughts of self-hatred are just continuously affirmed by everyone around me. Its like they only spoke to me cause they felt sorry for me. And they lied to me to have me beleived they cared. Only to one day turn around and never look back again. Never worth an explanation. Everything they tell you about growing up is a fucking joke. Just a way to mock me that yes. You are less then
I know how it feels. There are lots of people here who were betrayed by closed ones. Family members, significant others, friends many people from this community are in the same situation including myself. I hope that you will feel at home in this community.
 
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torturedbylife

torturedbylife

Enemy of the world
May 2, 2020
130
Unfortunately one of the harshest truth in life is that people come and go. No one stays,no one remains loyal. It's just the way it is.
 
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Kassender

Kassender

Experienced
Aug 29, 2018
217
I know the feeling and it sucks.

I remember every person that did this to me and everytime i think ive met someone, it happens again.

It's like you said, how are you supposed to love yourself this way ?
When every person you meet treats you like shit and throws you away like you're nothing?
And i dont mean coworkers or casual acquaintances, but people i considered friends or family, who i thought felt the same.

It sucks. It's driven me to isolate myself as every interaction i have is now negative in some way, even with my immediate family.

It's killing me.
Humans are not meant to be alone.
 
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SipSop

SipSop

Arcanist
May 7, 2020
483
Humans are not meant to be alone.
You are soo right. I felt this on my own skin. After I was driven out of home to be on my own I stayed few years pretty much alone. This made me be with the wrong people. I craved human contact. To be seen and understood. To be able to comnunicate with somebody. I needed caring people, not just abusers and schemers. I needed to let myself be vulnerable and honest, not just to wear a happy social mask. Nurturing people help us grow and develop. Contact is indeed needed.
 
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M

merpmerp

Member
Apr 5, 2020
28
Unfortunately one of the harshest truth in life is that people come and go. No one stays,no one remains loyal. It's just the way it is.

That is so so sad i dont want to accept that reality
I know the feeling and it sucks.

I remember every person that did this to me and everytime i think ive met someone, it happens again.

It's like you said, how are you supposed to love yourself this way ?
When every person you meet treats you like shit and throws you away like you're nothing?
And i dont mean coworkers or casual acquaintances, but people i considered friends or family, who i thought felt the same.

It sucks. It's driven me to isolate myself as every interaction i have is now negative in some way, even with my immediate family.

It's killing me.
Humans are not meant to be alone.

Yes! This is exactly it. It's reassuring to know im not alone but its also such a dark reality. Theres nothing to gain from being vulnerable with someone. It kills me too. Im sorry we're hurting. Im sorry for the way the world is
You are soo right. I felt this on my own skin. After I was driven out of home to be on my own I stayed few years pretty much alone. This made me be with the wrong people. I craved human contact. To be seen and understood. To be able to comnunicate with somebody. I needed caring people, not just abusers and schemers. I needed to let myself be vulnerable and honest, not just to wear a happy social mask. Nurturing people help us grow and develop. Contact is indeed needed.

Desperation for it will cause more pain later on it seems. I use to think these people were psychopaths. Now its either the norm or its me. Either 2 scenarios I dont want to accept.
 
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Bct

Bct

Disqualified from Being Human
Apr 20, 2020
419
This really sucks. Ghosted by my crush (not to mention countless other love life failures), friends who don't give any reply after I texting about my problem. At least please let me know if the reason of ghosting is due to myself or their own.
 
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M

merpmerp

Member
Apr 5, 2020
28
This really sucks. Ghosted by my crush (not to mention countless other love life failures), friends who don't give any reply after I texting about my problem. At least please let me know if the reason of ghosting is due to myself or their own.

Exactly. I understand why people avoid confrontation but then why only a few days prior act like i was important? like i meant something to them? Was our friendship an act on their part? A joke to them this whole time?
 
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Bct

Bct

Disqualified from Being Human
Apr 20, 2020
419
Exactly. I understand why people avoid confrontation but then why only a few days prior act like i was important? like i meant something to them? Was our friendship an act on their part? A joke to them this whole time?

Yes, it's really confusing. If they have no interest in our life, it's better to do nothing instead of pretending to care then suddenly ghosting us. Worse if they contact us later as if they never ghosting in the first place.
 
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RileyTanaka

RileyTanaka

ill / failure
Mar 20, 2020
264
SOs, supposedly good friends.... whats the point. my thoughts of self-hatred are just continuously affirmed by everyone around me

Everything you learn about love and friendship growing up is a fucking joke. Just a way to mock me. A measuring stick for later to confirm that yes. You are less then
It hurt reading this, because I can feel the disappointment, devastation, and sadness in your words. I wish I could lie to you and say that things would get better with people. But a lot of us on this forum are sensitive, idealistic people. We give too much to others and hope for the same - only to be crushed by the reality of life and people when we realize how much of living is a transactional exchange. All I can say is that you deserve better.
 
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BabyYoda

BabyYoda

F*ck this sh!t I'm out
Dec 30, 2019
552
I agree, friendships and love are a cruel joke, they're not worth pursuing at all
 
Pryras

Pryras

Last hope
Feb 11, 2020
524
Feeling this! Basically the story of my life, I'm always going out of my way to make sure I'm there but I can't name anyone in my life who would do the same unfortunately. I've learned not to invest time or energy into people who won't do the same for you. Because of this, I don't have anyone I'd call a friend irl. Still waiting for that person who would be there for me as I would for them
 
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Crushed_Innocence

Crushed_Innocence

Hungry Ghost
Oct 16, 2019
423
Same here. Ghoasting is a cruel cowardly practice. It has pushed me over the edge. I cant wait to exit this shithole of a life....
 
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Isittimetogonola

Isittimetogonola

Kindness is a weakness to be taken advantage by al
Oct 22, 2019
198
From one of my letters:
There have been many days where, I waited for a sign...from anybody and anything to reach out to me. A simple call, text anything. I screamed it at the world even said it was the one thing I needed most. Guest what, the world did not answer. Felt like it just hung up on me. So I am hanging up on it.

For me, it has always been that the things I needed the most and even rarely ask for get ripped away by the universe. It is sending the message that I have always felt. The universe is telling me that I can go fuck myself. It wants everything from me and just when it says that it is my turn, it ghosts me.
 
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