commotioner
New Member
- Aug 22, 2023
- 4
it's been a while since I've logged into this account. i thought it would go away, but I just got busy. the urge never stopped, it was silenced. unfortunately, there's no quick means readily available to me. everything would be easier if I was a loner, but quite honestly connecting with other people is the one drug that has kept me alive.
now that the urge is back and stronger than ever, I'm batting with this simple fact: ive let people around me get emotionally attached. i used to be so good at keeping everyone at a words length away. if i choose peace, i would be hurting those around me. some say that ending your own life is selfish, i'm burdened with that belief. my messed up brain needs to be terminated, but i don't want everyone who loves me have their lives ruined/ altered negatively.
now that the urge is back and stronger than ever, I'm batting with this simple fact: ive let people around me get emotionally attached. i used to be so good at keeping everyone at a words length away. if i choose peace, i would be hurting those around me. some say that ending your own life is selfish, i'm burdened with that belief. my messed up brain needs to be terminated, but i don't want everyone who loves me have their lives ruined/ altered negatively.
