Attempted suicide

[atdeathsdoor]

So I've been trying to think what actually went wrong when I tried to CBT (partial hanging) I used a old bed sheet which I trapped into the top corner of my door and slammed it shut...even tested it with my body weight which was fine it was nice and secure put it round my neck and sat down....Next thing it went black no hurt no feelings felt like a daydream must of passed no idea how long when I came round I was struggling to breathe and was trying to undo the knot behind my head (S.I maybe ) just was thinking today it would of been a year since I died and am still here trapped in this world....I get excited thinking what would be peoples reactions if I told them I had days to live I would buzz off that....been bullied for my appearance since a child never been able to fit in in this society....limited friends....only a few family members left....what the fuck does God want from me just kill me off ffs you absolute evil c#@!

So I've been trying to think what actually went wrong when I tried to CBT (partial hanging) I used a old bed sheet which I trapped into the top corner of my door and slammed it shut...even tested it with my body weight which was fine it was nice and secure put it round my neck and sat down....Next thing it went black no hurt no feelings felt like a daydream must of passed no idea how long when I came round I was struggling to breathe and was trying to undo the knot behind my head (S.I maybe ) just was thinking today it would of been a year since I died and am still here trapped in this world....I get excited thinking what would be peoples reactions if I told them I had days to live I would buzz off that....been bullied for my appearance since a child never been able to fit in in this society....limited friends....only a few family members left....what the fuck does God want from me just kill me off ffs you absolute evil c#@!

The Robin Williams does this with ease with a belt and sat down

 

[CW36]

Only one in twenty five partials will succeed. Full hanging, although more intimidating, will always succeed with a sturdy setup.

Partial is likely a return and full is a one way ticket.

 

[atdeathsdoor]

Only one in twenty five partials will succeed. Full hanging, although more intimidating, will always succeed with a sturdy setup.

Partial is likely a return and full is a one way ticket.

Then Robbin Williams pulls it off 1st try

 

[CW36]

Then Robbin Williams pulls it off 1st try

If anyone deserved to it was that genius

 

[FuneralCry]

I hate how it's so difficult to die, failing a suicide attempt is what I would fear and I see it as being so cruel how it's not easier to permanently escape from all the suffering. I've read of partial hanging failing a lot on here, I certainly envy those who managed to succeed.