Help are hotels aloud to disclose personal information about guests?

[ecmnesia]

probably they are obligated by law to do so, if cops are involved. but considering a situation where someone voluntarily disappear (say this person left a note explicitly saying she does not wish to be found), could they still do it?

all the hotels near me required ID to check-in. that's why I am asking. I sound like a freak, but knowing my family I have no doubts they could possibly track me.

 

[Spitfire]

Nope. They are not allowed and generally do not disclose any information to anyone about their guests. This is not to say an uninformed general worker at the front desk will not do so without question though...

Under normal circumstances they absolutely will not disclose this information.

When the police are involved for whatever reason it is totally different matter.

 

[ecmnesia]

Nope. They are not allowed and generally do not disclose any information to anyone about their guests. This is not to say an uninformed general worker at the front desk will not do so without question though...

Under normal circumstances they absolutely will not disclose this information.

When the police are involved for whatever reason it is totally different matter.

is there a way to prevent police from being involved?

 

[Huntfish34]

Hmm.. with a dead body I don't see how the police Won't be involved.. idk ? Just my .02

 

[Spitfire]

is there a way to prevent police from being involved?

That is a tough question. Probably not though? I think a worker at the front desk, or the manager of a hotel will cooperate with the cops.

 

[ecmnesia]

Hmm.. with a dead body I don't see how the police Won't be involved.. idk ? Just my .02

sorry, i think I wasn't clear, i was talking about the disappearing part. you see, although I am of age, i have quite controlling parents, and I wish to get away to cbt, but i can't risk being found before the final hour.

 

[Huntfish34]

Ah ok,. I'm sorry. My bad. =\.

 

[Quinlor]

Try to die before someone find you, buddy.

 

[Gnip]

The places which freely disclose this information as a matter of policy would not be able to compete with those which maintain confidentiality.

As a motel auditor at the end of my working life, I informed the police (including federal law enforcement) that the establishments I worked for were private enterprises, and that they would need to obtain a warrant to access that information, that I was not willing to lose my job over simply providing that knowledge (and that my corporation would be subject to lawsuits if we did so without warrants).

 

[x~Sophia~x]

sorry, i think I wasn't clear, i was talking about the disappearing part. you see, although I am of age, i have quite controlling parents, and I wish to get away to cbt, but i can't risk being found before the final hour.

Would your parents think of looking for you at a hotel though?

Could you travel and book into a hotel that is not in your local area?

 

[Quinlor]

The places which freely disclose this information as a matter of policy would not be able to compete with those which maintain confidentiality.

As a motel auditor at the end of my working life, I informed the police (including federal law enforcement) that the establishments I worked for were private enterprises, and that they would need to obtain a warrant to access that information, that I was not willing to lose my job over simply providing that knowledge (and that my corporation would be subject to lawsuits if we did so without warrants).

Where did you work? John Wick Continental Hotel

 

[ecmnesia]

Would your parents think of looking for you at a hotel though?

Could you travel and book into a hotel that is not in your local area?

i haven't considered that possibility before. now i feeling dumb

i wouldn't need much time honestly, 12 hours would be enough. i am just so scared of being found, it's a little bit too much of paranoia, but what if they tracked my phone? honestly, why can't they just travel and leave me alone?

 

[x~Sophia~x]

i haven't considered that possibility before. now i feeling dumb

i wouldn't need much time honestly, 12 hours would be enough. i am just so scared of being found, it's a little bit too much of paranoia, but what if they tracked my phone? honestly, why can't they just travel and leave me alone?

Are you an adult? If you are of adult age, the police would not be allowed to track your phone, especially if you'd only been missing for a few hours.

Can you tell your parents that you're staying with a friend?

Are you an adult? If you are of adult age, the police would not be allowed to track your phone, especially if you'd only been missing for a few hours.

Can you tell your parents that you're staying with a friend?

And if you turn your tracker OFF, they certainly won't be able to track you.

 

[Gnip]

Where did you work? John Wick Continental Hotel

Motel 6, when the multinational French Accor Hospitality Corporation owned and operated it. (Today, Motel 6 is owned by The Blackstone Group in New York City, which purchased the chain from Accor a few years after I retired.)

 

[ecmnesia]

Are you an adult? If you are of adult age, the police would not be allowed to track your phone, especially if you'd only been missing for a few hours.

Can you tell your parents that you're staying with a friend?


And if you turn your tracker OFF, they certainly won't be able to track you.

yes. doesn't sound like it but surprisingly I'm 21, still chained with my family tho :(

i don't actually have friends around anymore, so i think that wouldn't be a good a excuse.

maybe I need some sleep to calm down. i know that rushing things will probably bite me later, i can't help it tho.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

yes. doesn't sound like it but surprisingly I'm 21, still chained with my family tho :(

i don't actually have friends around anymore, so i think that wouldn't be a good a excuse.

maybe I need some sleep to calm down. i know that rushing things will probably bite me later, i can't help it tho.

I agree, take some rest and try not to over think it. Hugs

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I would tell the front desk when I check in that I have been stalked by my family who perpetrates domestic violence, and the staff is to deny I am there to anyone who asks. I would tell them that my family calls the police and says I'm missing to have me tracked down and harass me on their behalf, and that the hotel staff are not to even tell the police I am there without a warrant. I would tell the staff that if they cannot agree to my requests and assure me that they understand and agree, then I will have to stay elsewhere. I would also ask them if they have a policy about such things so I feel confident that they're not bullshitting that they agree.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

I would tell the front desk when I check in that I have been stalked by my family who perpetrates domestic violence, and the staff is to deny I am there to anyone who asks. I would tell them that my family calls the police and says I'm missing to have me tracked down and harass me on their behalf, and that the hotel staff are not to even tell the police I am there without a warrant. I would tell the staff that if they cannot agree to my requests and assure me that they understand and agree, then I will have to stay elsewhere. I would also ask them if they have a policy about such things so I feel confident that they're not bullshitting that they agree.

Hmm, I wouldn't do any of that, it just raises suspicion. It might take a great deal of courage for ecmnesia to even book a hotel and check in, without adding all that to the mix.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Hmm, I wouldn't do any of that, it just raises suspicion. It might take a great deal of courage for ecmnesia to even book a hotel and check in, without adding all that to the mix.

I thoroughly disagree. If anything, it would avert suspicion. There would be a reason for nervousness. And besides, self-protection is the issue here. That requires assertiveness, not being scared and timid.

 

[Huntfish34]

I agree with fragile on this... But I'm certainly not going to argue about it.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

I thoroughly disagree.

That's fair enough, but I don't think it's down to you to disagree. ecmnesia sounds like she's very anxious and not confident enough to do that... so we'll leave it to ecmnesia to decide, as it is she/he who will be checking into the hotel, and not you or I.

I thoroughly disagree. If anything, it would avert suspicion. There would be a reason for nervousness. And besides, self-protection is the issue here. That requires assertiveness, not being scared and timid.

And where can ecmnesia buy this assertiveness from?

 

[Meditation guide]

And where can ecmnesia buy this assertiveness from?

Maybe from gpe? She has plenty.

 

[HelloHell]

As far as I know, your family can't involve the police unless you've been missing for a certain time (24h? idk it depends on where you are)
so maybe just make sure you ctb before that time limit?
and without police involvement, i'm pretty sure hotel staff won't disclose your personal info

 

[x~Sophia~x]

Maybe from gpe? She has plenty.

Great, I'll order some as well!

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Maybe from gpe? She has plenty.

Great, I'll order some as well!

If I could package it and sell it to anyone who's ever been abused or under threat of abuse, I would.

I certainly share abundant resources, encouragement and support for connecting with one's own, and I don't treat people as if they don't already have it and can't connect with it.

However they may need help knowing it's there and believing they have the right to it. I needed that help, and I got in the form of supportive people like therapists and empowered peers, and from books like Boundaries and In Sheep's Clothing. I didn't need being told I didn't have it, I wasn't confident enough, who did I think I was, did I honestly think I could do it -- all that kind of stuff, which is just enabling for abusers, keeps them in power, definitely not something a supportive ally would say.

Thanks for reaffirming my assertiveness and the self-respect that goes with it. I'm cool, but it's still nice to have reflected back, even when it's back-handed.

 

[x~Sophia~x]

If I could package it and sell it to anyone who's ever been abused or under threat of abuse, I would.

I certainly share abundant resources, encouragement and support for connecting with one's own, and I don't treat people as if they don't already have it and can't connect with it.

However they may need help knowing it's there and believing they have the right to it. I needed that help, and I got in the form of supportive people like therapists and empowered peers, and from books like Boundaries and In Sheep's Clothing. I didn't need being told I didn't have it, I wasn't confident enough, who did I think I was, did I honestly think I could do it -- all that kind of stuff, which is just enabling for abusers, keeps them in power, definitely not something a supportive ally would say.

Thanks for reaffirming my assertiveness and the self-respect that goes with it. I'm cool, but it's still nice to have reflected back, even when it's back-handed.

GPE... with respect, your story isn't everyone's story, and ecmnesia probably doesn't have the time or the inclination to build up her confidence with therapists and book reading. They just want to 'get the job done' and I am in no doubt that they don't have the confidence to do what you are suggesting.

It's just a shame that you are unable to recognise the lack of confidence that some people have, when you read other's posts.

 

[Throwmyselfaway]

If you are over the age of 18 and you actually leave a note saying you left, the cops won't look into it. You arent technically a missing person by their definition.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

If you are over the age of 18 and you actually leave a note saying you left, the cops won't look into it. You arent technically a missing person by their definition.

Ooh, I hadn't though of that.

Although the family could just toss the note.

I wonder if there's another way, though, like asking the police in advance how to manage a situation like this, where the family may try to use the police to control the OP, such as tracking her down. I think OP isn't from the US, so I don't know what the laws are there.

 

[Throwmyselfaway]

Ooh, I hadn't though of that.

Although the family could just toss the note.

I wonder if there's another way, though, like asking the police in advance how to manage a situation like this, where the family may try to use the police to control the OP, such as tracking her down. I think OP isn't from the US, so I don't know what the laws are there.

Even if they toss the note the police can't doing anything for 48 hours. It's only kids they will go after right away.

 

[Caspers]

I do second the idea of telling the staff that you are running away from abusive family. If you don't feel confident saying it out loud, have you considered writing it down and handing it to them during check in? Also I do worry that if your parents think you may be a harm to yourself and tell the police, they be able to search for you faster. But hopefully with a note, the police would see the situation. I wish you the best of luck whatever you go with