Discussion Anyone else never had a genuine connection with someone?

[mrbombastic]

I have a lot of acquaintances, and a few people I know well enough to call friends, but I have never been "close friends" with anyone. I have very few genuine hobbies or interests that I can talk about with people, and I never socialize with people outside of work or college.

Has Anyone else had a similar experience?

 

[DeadPetal]

The one person I was with all the time, that I connected with as a best friend and romantically is dead.

 

[mathieu]

I had only one very close friend. We used to talk for ages on the phone every day. Went out clubbing every weekend. She moved abroad and ended up killing herself. So yeah, I've always had trouble making close friends, except for her.

 

[Pryras]

Same here, a lot of acquaintances but not "close friends" last year was the first time I really connected with someone, we became VERY close, like we were the same person, he was just older and a guy.

Fast forward to now, it was the worst experience in my life after he assaulted me and never gave me an apology. It's over now but makes you reassess what his feelings were. Sometimes we think we're close with someone when it's really just one sided.

Im okay without having close friends, less drama and I don't have to worry about hurting anyone or getting hurt myself.

 

[mrbombastic]

The one person I was with all the time, that I connected with as a best friend and romantically is dead.

I'm really sorry to here that, makes me feel grateful for the friends I do have.
Hang in there man.

Same here, a lot of acquaintances but not "close friends" last year was the first time I really connected with someone, we became VERY close, like we were the same person, he was just older and a guy.

Fast forward to now, it was the worst experience in my life after he assaulted me and never gave me an apology. It's over now but makes you reassess what his feelings were. Sometimes we think we're close with someone when it's really just one sided.

Im okay without having close friends, less drama and I don't have to worry hurting anyone or getting hurt myself.

I'm really sorry you experienced that. Some people I have considered "friends" in the past have made it clear that the feelings are not mutual.

 

[Chalken]

I've never connected with someone truly. I used to have friends, but I never felt a deep connection with them.

 

[Evermore]

I find it very hard to connect with people. I have brief moments where I think I might be able to but it always passes .

 

[Ardesevent]

I barely know anyone I can barely consider a acquaintance now. It's mostly my fault though, I do go out of my way to avoid everyone. It's just hard to know who's going to stab you in the back and who actually cares about you.

 

[mrbombastic]

I barely know anyone I can barely consider a acquaintance now. It's mostly my fault though, I do go out of my way to avoid everyone. It's just hard to know who's going to stab you in the back and who actually cares about you.

This is something I definitely fear happening to me. As soon as I graduate, I will most likely grow apart from the few friends I have left

 

[Meowkin]

I have a lot of acquaintances, and a few people I know well enough to call friends, but I have never been "close friends" with anyone. I have very few genuine hobbies or interests that I can talk about with people, and I never socialize with people outside of work or college.

Has Anyone else had a similar experience?

Pretty similar with anything human. The only genuine connection I've made is with my cat which doesn't count as someone.

 

[WhatIsMyLife]

Yep. I've never been able to make that bridge between "friend" and "good/close friend." I always know that I'm never anyone's best friend. It sucks, but I guess I'm used to it.

 

[Bct]

Me too. I don't have anyone who I could consider as close, even with family. I once being asked "Who is your best friend?" but I couldn't give any answer, fearing the person I thought as my best friend doesn't feel the same. Years of mentally neglected and betrayals causing me to be insecure if people will leave me in the end, especially since I also have a bad personality that I can't get rid of.

 

[Deleted member 14386]

I only socialize with people I meet through hobbies. I have no friends, colleagues/acquaintances, it was my bad to push them all away. Although now I treasure the moments I spend with strangers. I guess I did have a good connection at some point, but they moved on as anyone would. I don't think I was ever very well socially equipped.

 

[Ky204]

I relate to this a lot. When I start to open up and be more comfortable with other people they usually end up leaving in the end. I've gotten used to feeling isolated though, the acceptance of it comes with time.

 

[suzylou]

yeah, i had 1, but they died. with coronavirus its hard to keep in contact with the friends i have now unfortunately too

 

[TheSoulless]

As a child I had one true friend who I hung out with all the time. We've been drifting apart for the last few years, not sure if I'll even see him again after next week's graduation "ceremony".

 

[ssaaahmo]

the one person i have a connection with died and i always hide something from everybody else so i feel like i can't make connections anymore

 

[adios]

Recently I've come to the conclusion that I'll always be extremely unlikeable, even though I try so hard not to be. The few friends I've had get fed up with me before I'm able to connect with them. I guess I'm sort of a social failure.

 

[I screwed up]

No real friend ... Only acquaintance. In fact the only person I love for and care is my son ... Never fell in love with any one else

 

[mrbombastic]

Recently I've come to the conclusion that I'll always be extremely unlikeable, even though I try so hard not to be. The few friends I've had get fed up with me before I'm able to connect with them. I guess I'm sort of a social failure.

I've had this same experience. People can only tolerate me if I stay quiet. As soon as I begin to talk, I come across as awkward and unlikable. I struggle to hold a conversation with someone I've known for years.

 

[HoolioCoolio]

very similar, I cant go to normal school and I'm about to be a super senior so no-one is going to respect me even though I only skipped school

 

[ArtsyDrawer]

I tried to make actual friends at work for a while.
Didn't work out.
I have just people that exist in my general vicinity.

 

[BeeLoyal]

2 people i called friends, one of them fucked my now ex gf and the other one just simply doesn't care for friendships, sadly since he is funny...

 

[HoolioCoolio]

@BeeLoyal that sounds like a straight triple backstab, people are so hard to trust

 

[mrbombastic]

2 people i called friends, one of them fucked my now ex gf and the other one just simply doesn't care for friendships, sadly since he is funny...

Reading these comments and realizing how fortunate I've been. No one has ever back-stabbed me or went behind my back.