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HelensNepenthe

HelensNepenthe

Thoughtful poster
Jan 17, 2019
835
I've essentially started to do this before I CTB. My friends think I'm just having a cooling off period... My family has no idea about my thoughts of CTB. Since people in our house are gun enthusiasts, I'm patiently waiting for the chance of me owning a gun... just to use it once.
 
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EmotionlessWanderer

EmotionlessWanderer

Specialist
Jan 19, 2019
352
Yep. I considered drowning and/or disappearing deep in the bush (I live in Australia) for this reason. I don't want to do it at home, I don't want to do it where a member of the public may find me, I don't want my boyfriend or his family members to have to identify my body. It'd be so much easier if I could just disappear.
If I had the money I would honestly move to a different country for my suicide. Maybe a place that's not to civilized or somewhere like Syria where death among people is common.

Unfortunately I don't have the funds so I'm stuck with either a hotel or woods and hope that some overly curious bypasser doesn't find me in the act.
 
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ctrl_alt_delete

ctrl_alt_delete

r e p l i c a n t
Nov 14, 2018
222
Bouvet Island looks pretty good.

But I'd much rather have never existed.
 
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F

feeling loss

Member
Jan 23, 2019
7
my Japanese friend told me that in japan there is a company that actually help you to disappear completely. hope Malaysia have one !!
 
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Thursdaysucks

Thursdaysucks

Member
Jan 20, 2019
7
Feel like that'd be selfish in a way. Personally when I go I'd atleast like to have my family and friends do a proper burial. I'm sure their true feelings would come out then. Which sucks in a way because I'd like to know they cared rn. Anyway. It's like a respect thing. Feel free to your own opinion tho
 
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Roulette

Roulette

???
Aug 31, 2018
145
God yes, I want my presence to be immediately slashed and forgotten. I wish the whole world would leave me to my solitude, in life and in death.
 
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not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Archangel
Mar 23, 2018
9,553
I fear ctb and having a family member find me. Ya some cheap motel is a possibility, but I've already caused them so much unwarranted pain and disappointment that ctb seems almost cruel (also pretty cruel to some poor maid).

I wish I could just vanish, pretend to have moved out and away, that I'm finding myself, that I'm OK and happy, but to please not to come looking. Maybe the unknown is even more cruel, I dunno. I've fantasied about walking into a state forest and doing a partial deep in the wilderness (hopefully animals will remove any evidence), or even just drowning in the ocean far enough to not be washed back ashore.

Anyone else feel the same?

I wish I could just disappear as well. I don't want anyone to have to see my dead body. I don't know where I will end it … I haven't figured that part out yet.
 
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not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Archangel
Mar 23, 2018
9,553
Another advantage of dissapearing without a trace is that your family can hold hope that you'll return alive one day, instead of knowing you're dead.

I don't know if that would be more cruel and painful to just "not know" :notsure:
 
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not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Archangel
Mar 23, 2018
9,553
I wish I can just snap my fingers and suddenly I'm gone. No one would of ever heard of me, or known me. Like I disappeared like a fart in the wind.

Me too … Instead of just being a fart. :wink:
 
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killing me softly

killing me softly

don't wake me, i plan on sleeping in
Dec 28, 2018
171
Bouvet Island looks pretty good.

i wonder if A will ship there...:blarg:

i heard a story a couple of years back about a town in Belgium called Geel whose residents open their arms (and homes) to people with mental illness. ever since then i've dreamed about just dropping everything and moving there. almost seems like the closest thing to utopia for those with mental health problems.

https://www.npr.org/sections/health...wn-has-embraced-strangers-with-mental-illness
 
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sneakysneaky

sneakysneaky

I want 2 die
Jan 23, 2019
13
I live in the US, but I'm from the Philippines. If I CTB in the US, I fear that my family is going to ship my body back home to the PH, and that's a lot of hassle and it's going to cost a lot. So it'll be more convenient if my body was not found. If I ever CTB, I think the only trace that I want to leave behind is a bunch of letters.
 
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zenn7

zenn7

Member
Nov 12, 2018
48
I've dreamed of being able to disappear without a trace for years. That is to say - CTB and never be found. My plan is to hike deep into the woods and hang. Hopefully my remains are not found.
Thank you for posting. I can totally relate to not having my body found.
I had this plan when I was much younger and failed to ctb in the Rocky mtns. Now that I'm in your age group I am planning to die in the fall. Good luck.
 
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Feline

Feline

I am Purity, they call me Perverted.
Jan 24, 2019
61
Like Richey Edwards? Only he CTB...
 
Feline

Feline

I am Purity, they call me Perverted.
Jan 24, 2019
61
Some teenage kid hanged himself in the cemetery near me... lovely place to CTB. I often wonder how young kids manage to hang themselves? I've failed numerous times and I'm nearly 40!

I feel exactly the same. I want to do full hanging in a forest and have nobody find me. And there are plenty of forests nearby.......
 
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RememberWhatUCameFor

RememberWhatUCameFor

dont cry for me im already dead
Nov 20, 2018
590
if you disappear without trace your family will keep looking for you and spending a lot of money, time and energy on it


its nice fantasy but thats about it
 
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