I feel like it's a little dumb to feel weak over giving into the survival instinct that's literally built into your system as a human being, but I feel like that's what's convincing me to move forward with the process. Like, I have to prove to myself that I'm strong and serious and I don't just want attention or something. Idk, maybe if I removed the shame component I wouldn't be jumping this far into the deep end. Maybe that's true for some other people too?
ewigeruhe
Student
- Jun 26, 2022
- 112
Yeah i am deeply ashamed and every failed attempt hurts. I feel time is running out and the walls closing in and yet i seem to be determined to make my situation worse every day i don't know how this irratonal behavior is possible.
