Venting anyone else feel like their life is gonna end soon?

[dumblosergirl]

like i haven't made the plan to CTB but i don't trust myself and i feel i may start actively looking for a way soon and it'll be out of my control, anyone else feel this way? I told my friends "i feel like i won't be alive for much longer" but they don't really take me seriously but it's a looming dread i have

 

[Holu]

like i haven't made the plan to CTB but i don't trust myself and i feel i may start actively looking for a way soon and it'll be out of my control, anyone else feel this way? I told my friends "i feel like i won't be alive for much longer" but they don't really take me seriously but it's a looming dread i have

Always. It's as if I was born dead and I can feel my soul yearning to return or as if I'm living in borrowed time. Idk when, I'm not fully sure how, but Ik it's going to happen.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

I wish.

 

[Zegers]

Yes, i can feel it.

 

[saddestbunny]

yea, it feels kinda relieving though

 

[FindingHome]

Yes, I always tell myself its a matter of time. I see myself dying before the year ends. I can just feel it.

 

[EndJstifiesTheMeans]

As soon i got the SN i will do it
24/48 hours.. i really hope they dont cancell or stuff like that, or i have to do the full hunging, its no hope because in this days i lost completely the girl i love

 

[Holu]

yea, it feels kinda relieving though

I think that's the point. Honestly I think it's trained into me from everytime i thought "it won't matter cuz I'll be dead by" or every time something when wrong and my mind rushed to suicide. The fixation of the inevitability of my death is a coping mechanism at this point

 

[dumblosergirl]

As soon i got the SN i will do it

that's where I'm at too. I feel like looking up a source for SN just so I know and will be ready when it does come

yea, it feels kinda relieving though

I feel in distress because I don't want to die yet but I feel like there's no way to stop it and it will happen sooner than I think.

 

[Holu]

As soon i got the SN i will do it
24/48 hours.. i really hope they dont cancell or stuff like that, or i have to do the full hunging, its no hope because in this days i lost completely the girl i love

(PM me for this)Where u order from? I recently saw a post regarding TIG and it's poor purity and have abstained from recommending it. If possible, let me know the site and when it arrives the purity. Even if it's TIG I just want assurance so I can actually give a proper recommendation for SN sources

 

[EndJstifiesTheMeans]

that's where I'm at too. I feel like looking up a source for SN just so I know and will be ready when it does come

I feel in distress because I don't want to die yet but I feel like there's no way to stop it and it will happen sooner than I think.

If you open a thread asking for a source someone will give you i think

Don't tell people you are suicidal.. i scared the girl i love telling her that, even if people try to understand they will always think that they can't break relethionships with you so they don't even give you a chance in the first place, and stuff like that..

 

[Winterreise]

Yes, some serious blow will happen soon. heart failure, cancer, tumor. I don't work out anymore. I don't care to eat healthy.

 

[Aloneisbestforme]

I Always feel like my life is gonna end soon.

Though it will prob not end soon sadly but I always get that feeling/thought and I don't mind it anymore.
I'm just trying to learn to embrace it

 

[dumblosergirl]

If you open a thread asking for a source someone will give you i think

Don't tell people you are suicidal.. i scared the girl i love telling her that, even if people try to understand they will always think that they can't break relethionships with you so they don't even give you a chance in the first place, and stuff like that..

Thank you if anyone here does have an SN source please PM <3

I only say it vaguely so I can get help and feel cared about from my friends. Like I said before I don't want to die but it's just been hanging over my head for awhile and really is troubling me. I only told my close friends vaguely. My regular friends have no clue.

 

[jbear824]

Yes. I'm pretty sure being homeless will kill me. Just really depends on how it does that.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Not soon enough, as far as I'm concerned.

 

[404]

i feel that too

currently im (kinda) trying to improve myself and wait for my friend to come back but the longer i do that the thought of failing and ctb becomes more frequent than ever

 

[Nakiya]

My body has been deteriorating for a while now. I have really bad genetics. Both my parents suffer from cardiovascular issues. My dad has heart failure and my mom has heart disease. Recently my aunt passed away from a heart attack. I'm only afraid that I wouldn't finish my game project in time before I pass on.

 

[roboteulogy]

i feel that, always feels like i'm going to die soon but it's been a while now. always knew that i'd only die by my own hands and it always feels like soon but it hasn't happened yet. i was not supposed to live this long, i do not have plans for the future.

i have to make a decision to either live or die but neither are easy options. i can't cope with life and the issues baked into me from birth yet i'm too cowardly to take that step to ctb too. i always have some stupid hopes that something will magically fix me and that the problems i have are trivial and unimportant in the bigger picture. it makes me feel fucking stupid and i hate it.

so i'm just stuck in this frustrating limbo - deteriorating and rotting away in these 4 walls. truth is, i'm not gonna die any time soon if i don't act on it. things will only get worse because i just sit on my ass all day and cry. unfit for life and too scared for death.

but that feeling has always lingered that i'll die soon. it doesn't work to my benefit though. hope i'll make a decision soon

 

[froggirl9000]

Yeah. My health isn't too good and I haven't been eating well recently, even by my standards. I cough a lot and barely sleep.
It feels like I've got something that's gonna make me croak before I can do it myself. Fuck going to the doctor, though. I'd rather just let it be.

 

[ctvunny]

Perhaps in my own terms, I guess so but if I havent had these thoughts maybe no? I want to enjoy life again.

 

[_Alfarooq_]

like i haven't made the plan to CTB but i don't trust myself and i feel i may start actively looking for a way soon and it'll be out of my control, anyone else feel this way? I told my friends "i feel like i won't be alive for much longer" but they don't really take me seriously but it's a looming dread i have

My life is definitely going to end soon, I am a failure, an incel, and my family is a piece of trash, and everyone in this area is narcisisstic, and I am going to make the decision to CTB once all hope is lost.

 

[numbed one]

like i haven't made the plan to CTB but i don't trust myself and i feel i may start actively looking for a way soon and it'll be out of my control, anyone else feel this way? I told my friends "i feel like i won't be alive for much longer" but they don't really take me seriously but it's a looming dread i have

Same hère , people dont take me seriously but one day they will know.

 

[bluebus]

Absolutely, pretty soon I'd say.

 

[CandyK__]

I feel that sense of hopelessness, which when I think is not true and life will be fine afterwards, but now it's as if I was looking through black and white filter. Even hope looks so bleak.

It's awareness of my condition that lets me keep head above water, but I don't control myself too much, I bought rope in a sex shop. It feels like I'm two people at once, who want different things. A lot of bad things always come together in a package

Goals, and dreams I had for long time are slowly becoming impossible to achieve, and I try to find different dreams, but everything feels like credit rolls are about to show up. There is nothing good going on. People who I considered close and was talking on a daily basis shut off, while obnoxiously posting about what a great time they're having, and on top of that I failed important exams, that might end in being kicked out. I just remember it was so much better. And now I'm asking if this is end of this film, or the middle part where everything goes wrong, but works out in the end?

 

[chop]

I totally know what your saying, my life has been spiraling worse and worse really I don't plan on CTB anytime soon but it's something I do sometimes think about like "why is this all happening to me now, I was so happy and now all this?" hopefully my time isn't up soon.

 

[StellaSomnus]

It depends on my mental health, but as evidenced by the fact that I recently registered and am here, it has declined significantly that I may actually be dead in a couple of weeks, maybe months but within 1 year from my birthday this year is my target.

Only a few months ago I keep wishing I die in my sleep on a daily basis, then I gradually got better, but things took a turn recently when I failed my driving test twice in a row. If I fail my 3rd attempt, which is yet to happen, I've made up my mind that I'm going to give up entirely and start looking at my options to ctb. If I fail, I look forward to ctb within a couple of weeks, gonna gather some resources here so I'll know if that'll happen.

 

[pyroxenic]

It feels like time is ticking and that death is waiting for me around the corner whereever i am. Even when some days are "ok". Its back at my mind constantly. But i wont let myself die of old age, my life ends on my terms and thats final. So i guess you can my life would only end soon because of myself only.

 

[Hunter2005]

Yeah I know it and honestly I can't wait.

 

[Takamagahara]

Physiologically and physically, I'm perfectly healthy. But I'm capable of a lot of weird psychosomatic stuff (I've quit cigarettes cold turkey multiple times with no drawbacks for example, based purely on my mental state).

I can feel the end of my lifespan approaching. Being slower, sleeping more, caring less, being numb. Like my body knows what and when it's going to happen before my brain does.