Anyone else didn't make friends in university?

[Pure]

I didn't have any close friends in university as I was very depressed almost the entire time so I think I naturally repulsed people away from me. I'm not sure if this makes sense but I also think it's because I'm pretty repulsive to look at too (fat and ugly as a female lol). By the time I was able to keep my depression at bay to be a somewhat functioning person, it was my last year and too late by then.

Obviously I never had anyone interested in me romantically or sexually either. The people I would hang out with on occasion did, if they didn't it was easy for them to hook up with people. I tried tinder for that but zero luck.

Anyways my dad was complaining to me about the fact I didn't have any friends (we went to city I went to for university over the weekend and I didn't mention anyone). I tried keeping those thoughts to myself but seeing other people pick up on it is just fueling my suicidal thoughts.

I've just finished my first year of medical school and I'm still pretty lonely. During my gap year I made plans that I would try to be more social but covid killed that :'). Idk I hang out with one person on occasion but I think they mainly feel bad for me lol. My roommate is a lot more sociable, her program kinda of facilitates it but idk I'm still jealous.

Anyways major suicide fuel when I occasionally check on Facebook and insta and see my old college acquaintances being together while I'm just rotting in my bed (as usual).

Most people say that college was a very good time and they've made lifelong friends so very upsetting to me that I'm a royal fuck up.

I wonder what they'll (people I knew in college) would think if they found out I killed myself. Probably wouldn't even remember who I was.

I really want to kill myself....like now but I have to be alive until end of October lol. Sucks majorly because I'm barely alive as it is.

 

[bosconovitch]

Yeah, it was one of the reasons why I dropped out eventually

 

[Pure]

Yeah, it was one of the reasons why I dropped out eventually

Sorry that that happened to you too.

 

[BrokenArrow]

I always was confused by the whole "college will be the best years of your life" mantra - it just didn't feel like it.

I had some friends in college and one or two flings but always found a way to alienate myself pretty quickly. I'm really good at that.

At least you're going to medical school which is a great degree with great prospects.

This is cringe advice, but some dating apps have settings where you can it to 'friendship' mode - I've never used it but have heard some people making quite close friends using it. It might be worth a try...? If you're in med school then you got plenty of time

 

[CoolGuy9]

I have had problems making friends in school and work; I just can't start a conversation or keep one going. Seeing people talking to each other in public is suicide fuel for me.

 

[depressed21]

I was so shy that I was not able make any firends in unversity

 

[Pure]

This is cringe advice, but some dating apps have settings where you can it to 'friendship' mode - I've never used it but have heard some people making quite close friends using it. It might be worth a try...? If you're in med school then you got plenty of time

I've heard of this feature. It's on bumble at least but I've heard that people haven't had success with the friendship mode. I've pretty much every free app, I don't think I mentally could handle another rejection.

Maybe. I'm 25% done already and no difference between now and college except I've gained a shit ton of weight so I'm in an even worse position . It'll just get harder too once we have rotations. It sucks bc med students are some of the most narc type of people...I don't want to casually mention smoking pot and using shrooms to the wrong person then end up getting in trouble.

 

[upthedownescalatorr]

University was a complete nightmare for me. Everyone else seemed to immediately sort themselves into cliques and I found myself alone all the time with no idea how to approach people so I spent most of the time hiding in my room. I only lasted one semester. I only even went in the first place because I had no idea what else to do. I eventually found a job as a postal worker which I was comfortable in and got on with colleagues but quit after three years as I was paranoid about giving covid to my parents. I painfully regret leaving now but don't have the option of going back as I fucked up my health with prescription drugs and I can't drive anymore.

 

[Symbiote]

I hanged out with a group of gamers, but we never kept in touch after college. Drifted far apart and every now and then I look them up on FB to see what they're up to. There are some who married, especially the girl I had a crush on but was too chickenshit to ask out. Some have great jobs, and then some are still in the same city and we somehow avoid each other.

 

[demuic]

Yes, I've gone to two different schools so far and haven't made a single friend, and talked so rarely. I spent most of my time in my room because everyone else seemed to already have made their friend groups and last year with covid didn't help that.

University was a complete nightmare for me. Everyone else seemed to immediately sort themselves into cliques and I found myself alone all the time with no idea how to approach people so I spent most of the time hiding in my room. I only lasted one semester. I only even went in the first place because I had no idea what else to do. I eventually found a job as a postal worker which I was comfortable in and got on with colleagues but quit after three years as I was paranoid about giving covid to my parents. I painfully regret leaving now but don't have the option of going back as I fucked up my health by misusing prescription drugs and I can't drive anymore.

I can relate.. each year I've gone I've only completed one semester. Hated the experience both times, lonely and struggling, surrounded by people who didn't care and seemed to be having the time of their life. I'm dreading going back to another new school but if I live that's what my parents will expect of me which is why I want to CTB before that happens.

I don't regret leaving, I wish I would've never gone to either of the schools I chose in the first place, now I've got a bunch of debt and nothing to show for it.

It was extremely painful to me because I really thought college would be better than high school where I also had no friends and didn't talk to anyone, like everyone said, but that was a lie.

 

[bosconovitch]

Sorry that that happened to you too.

It sucks. Mind if I ask where you´re from? You don't have to answer if you don't want to.

 

[disillusionment]

I have social anxiety so yeah I didn't really have any friends

 

[Journeytoletgo]

I didn't have any close friends in university as I was very depressed almost the entire time so I think I naturally repulsed people away from me. I'm not sure if this makes sense but I also think it's because I'm pretty repulsive to look at too (fat and ugly as a female lol). By the time I was able to keep my depression at bay to be a somewhat functioning person, it was my last year and too late by then.

Obviously I never had anyone interested in me romantically or sexually either. The people I would hang out with on occasion did, if they didn't it was easy for them to hook up with people. I tried tinder for that but zero luck.

Anyways my dad was complaining to me about the fact I didn't have any friends (we went to city I went to for university over the weekend and I didn't mention anyone). I tried keeping those thoughts to myself but seeing other people pick up on it is just fueling my suicidal thoughts.

I've just finished my first year of medical school and I'm still pretty lonely. During my gap year I made plans that I would try to be more social but covid killed that :'). Idk I hang out with one person on occasion but I think they mainly feel bad for me lol. My roommate is a lot more sociable, her program kinda of facilitates it but idk I'm still jealous.

Anyways major suicide fuel when I occasionally check on Facebook and insta and see my old college acquaintances being together while I'm just rotting in my bed (as usual).

Most people say that college was a very good time and they've made lifelong friends so very upsetting to me that I'm a royal fuck up.

I wonder what they'll (people I knew in college) would think if they found out I killed myself. Probably wouldn't even remember who I was.

I really want to kill myself....like now but I have to be alive until end of October lol. Sucks majorly because I'm barely alive as it is.

I relate. It seems many of us struggle from loneliness here and finding it hard to make connections to others. I also died a long long time ago OP and developed severe social anxiety in my teens because of acne. I'm never going to live a normal life 29 is the cut off age for me that's it. I lived long enough to understand I need social connections but I won't have it because I'm unattractive and not sociable and fear people. My face expressions, my body language, and voice and mindset is off putting to people oh well nothing I can do but ride the wave of these last few months.

 

[Pure]

It sucks. Mind if I ask where you´re from? You don't have to answer if you don't want to.

Great Lakes Region

 

[pole]

i'm in my 4th year, and haven't made any friends. i don't have trouble speaking to people and i could go to those parties and be apart of those groups of people.

however, i think it's better to be alone, especially if your not well mentally. i found it draining and extremely exhausting just putting on a fake smile and interacting with people at uni. i'm much more productive alone anyways. different for everyone, but i feel like i'd just be playing a character if i tried making friends at uni, doing stuff, when i'm literally dying on the inside.

 

[CatTheBus5689]

I also made no lasting friends in college. I never expected much in the first place, I didn't have too many friends in high school either.

I can hardly find people I'd be willing to be acquainted with let alone be friends with, so many people are just out right unreasonable and bigoted. The few that don't just make me want to recoil in disgust at their sheer lack of mind are tolerable at best, even when there are people who are actually worth being friends with leave you soon enough. This is just a fact of life, people leave you.

A fact that I learned and cannot accept is no one is an exception. Absolutely nobody. And for someone who finds it hard to connect with others, what's the point?

 

[whyidon'tknow]

First year of uni (only made it through one) i never made friends. I was so miserable

 

[Marktheghost]

I made 8 friends. None of them were close friends or good friends, and they didn't stay in touch after university though. They cared so little about me, I ended up homeless and none of them gave me any help! I never had a romantic relationship either.

Maybe they were the least bad years of my life. Things are far worse now!

 

[DarkNearDeath]

Look I made friends, I'd say I'm an example of an introvert and socially awkward. I'm clearly not great at communicating but I managed to make some. Saying hi to someone is a start.

 

[NIÑAESTUPIDA]

I didn't talk to anybody, not a single person
I managed to avoid group work
I got my degree, but it wasn't worth it

 

[Neowise]

I completely understand how you feel. I did have friends at first, but starting from 3rd semester I slowly lost connection to them. Not sure why, maybe my depression completely consumed the rest of my personality and now I am just a boring and depressed fuck nobody wants to hand out with.

Anyways my dad was complaining to me about the fact I didn't have any friends (we went to city I went to for university over the weekend and I didn't mention anyone). I tried keeping those thoughts to myself but seeing other people pick up on it is just fueling my suicidal thoughts.

> My mother. "You have no friends, you only sit in your room all day.", "You're pretty and intelligent, just go out and make friends!" Yeah, it's not like I talked to people I got along super well with at parties and asked whether we wanna hang out and they were like "yeah sure, let's do that!" and after the party they never talked to me again. Literally ghosted me.

Man, even if I try to be sociable people still don't like me. I try to be friendly, helpful, be understanding, make them laugh, never talk about myself and only listen to them speaking, but still. I feel like someone put a curse on me during the 3rd semester.