Anyone else daydream and visualize about all the ways of dying multiple times a day?

[iloverachel]

Usually when i lay on my bed at night, in my dark room, I picture in my head all the ways to die. I envision myself jumping off a bridge, jumping off a skyscraper, taking N, dying from carbon monoxide poisoning, cutting my wrists.

There's just so many ways to die. I think about and envision my own suicide every day. It feels comforting and brings me peace knowing one day it will all end

Just repeating it in my mind, so I can feel comfortable and ready for when I decide to CTB for real. Mental preparation is important

 

[Re62]

I do it all the time but my reasons are a bit different, I am simply too much of a coward to actually go with it, so I just dream of it. A way to end all of my suffering and frustration.

 

[iloverachel]

I do it all the time but my reasons are a bit different, I am simply too much of a coward to actually go with it, so I just dream of it. A way to end all of my suffering and frustration.

I don't think it is cowardly at all. Death and CTBing is a pretty scary thing to do.

If you look at some statistics, theres millions who seriously think about or plan suicide, but way fewer people actually go through with it. I personally know friends who are extremely suicidal but are afraid or scared to actually go through with it. You are not alone in feeling scared about it

 

[donggi72]

I think of death from the moment I open my eyes to the moment I close my eyes. I hope I die as soon as possible

 

[iloverachel]

I think of death from the moment I open my eyes to the moment I close my eyes. I hope I die as soon as possible

That is me as well. Every day I wake up wishing i didn't

 

[donggi72]

That is me as well. Every day I wake up wishing i didn't

I don't know what's stopping me, but I want it to happen quickly

 

[grahf]

Everyday I always daydreaming being killed or killing myself
When sleep I hope I never wake up but here I'm always wake up
I'm coward too because I afraid if I fail will be vegetable

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

I don't think it is cowardly at all. Death and CTBing is a pretty scary thing to do.

If you look at some statistics, theres millions who seriously think about or plan suicide, but way fewer people actually go through with it. I personally know friends who are extremely suicidal but are afraid or scared to actually go through with it. You are not alone in feeling scared about it

View attachment 133422

48,000 died by suicide in 2021? Must be only one country. It's been about 1 million per year worldwide
Here it says one out of every 100 deaths is by suicide. 61 million people die every year of all causes

 

[iloverachel]

48,000 died by suicide in 2021? Must be only one country. It's been about 1 million per year worldwide

Yeah i think that graph is the US only

1 million per year now? That is an alarming number. I read it was 800,000 a few years ago

 

[jacobryan]

I can't stop thinking about my death. It's not a matter of if I ctb, it's a matter of when. I've got a couple of things I have to first, but once that list is complete, I'm getting off this blue and green rock. The so-called "normies" can have this sumbitch.

 

[TiredOfAllThis]

I keep visualising myself CTBing via SN

 

[Forever Sleep]

Since settling on SN as my method, I tend to fixate on that but yes, I think about it lots.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

No. I don't want to go through the dying process. I honestly don't think anybody does. What I want is death itself, not the harsh and brutal pathway towards death. I think that everybody else here is the same and that nobody here wants to go through a harsh suicide method but rather that they merely want the end result. It would be so nice if we could just have access to a button which will peacefully and instantly take us to the end result... death

I don't imagine me dying because it's uncomfortable. What I want is death itself