After many, many attempts to get it right, I finally reached the part where I could've died.
I had been practicing partial hanging and tried a new, more comfortable position to do it, where I was crouched on my bed and had my rope in a relatively low lying position. I was wearing a hoodie so that the rope wouldn't scrape my neck, I were using a slip knot with the knot on the back of my head and my ligature was nylon rope almost 9cm in diameter. I just pushed really hard in a single action. I didn't thought anything would arise of it, because my previous attempts had all proved to be complete failures and although my vision in my right eye was blacking out I had thought nothing of it (despite it never happening in any of my attempts), but just then I started having muscle spasms throughout my entire body. That was when SI kicked in and made me roll over into a position that stopped whatever it was that I was doing.
In hindsight, that was probably a good thing as my anchor wasn't securely tied, yet tied tight enough that I might've woken up five minutes later. I'll definitely be doing it again and I might not be responsive after the whole ordeal, but don't be excited, I'm promising nothing.
This is added detail for those who want to know how (partial) hanging had felt like for me:
Doing the action necessary for starting the process in of itself isn't all that painful. There's definitely pain but it's less pain due it not only being self-inflicted pain but also because I was wearing a hoodie (with the hat part of the hoodie around my head), so have padding. However, this is all subjective, some of us have higher pain tolerances than others.
The feelings one gets when they are suffering a blood choke varies, but I personally felt nothing aside from the obvious pain I was feeling due to rope being around my neck. I do feel that my cognitive abilities were reduced during the hanging, so maybe that should be something others worry about because it might've been due to my low cognition that I saved myself.
The muscle spasms were uncomfortable, not painful, but definitely uncomfortable.
Also, it took me like a solid ten seconds to realize I almost did it properly after I saved myself, but I felt a bit, nonchalant about the whole thing.
Edit: I've been trying for the last two months and it has never been easier to do it then now. I had just about manage to somehow do it successfully twice. Now all I need to do is to overcome SI.
What I did was that I kept going until I got a "push" that didn't give me the head bursting sensation. This time was definitely a bit scarier than the last as along with the muscle spasms I started hearing loud breathing (which was my own) coming from all directions and it felt like a demon had just surrounded me.
Additionally, for each proper attempt I was "choking" for no longer than five seconds, but the effects we're almost instantaneous and you could barely tell when they start setting in.
It wasn't all that bad and now I'm certainly too happy at the moment of having a reliable method to actually commit right now.
I had been practicing partial hanging and tried a new, more comfortable position to do it, where I was crouched on my bed and had my rope in a relatively low lying position. I was wearing a hoodie so that the rope wouldn't scrape my neck, I were using a slip knot with the knot on the back of my head and my ligature was nylon rope almost 9cm in diameter. I just pushed really hard in a single action. I didn't thought anything would arise of it, because my previous attempts had all proved to be complete failures and although my vision in my right eye was blacking out I had thought nothing of it (despite it never happening in any of my attempts), but just then I started having muscle spasms throughout my entire body. That was when SI kicked in and made me roll over into a position that stopped whatever it was that I was doing.
In hindsight, that was probably a good thing as my anchor wasn't securely tied, yet tied tight enough that I might've woken up five minutes later. I'll definitely be doing it again and I might not be responsive after the whole ordeal, but don't be excited, I'm promising nothing.
This is added detail for those who want to know how (partial) hanging had felt like for me:
Doing the action necessary for starting the process in of itself isn't all that painful. There's definitely pain but it's less pain due it not only being self-inflicted pain but also because I was wearing a hoodie (with the hat part of the hoodie around my head), so have padding. However, this is all subjective, some of us have higher pain tolerances than others.
The feelings one gets when they are suffering a blood choke varies, but I personally felt nothing aside from the obvious pain I was feeling due to rope being around my neck. I do feel that my cognitive abilities were reduced during the hanging, so maybe that should be something others worry about because it might've been due to my low cognition that I saved myself.
The muscle spasms were uncomfortable, not painful, but definitely uncomfortable.
Also, it took me like a solid ten seconds to realize I almost did it properly after I saved myself, but I felt a bit, nonchalant about the whole thing.
Edit: I've been trying for the last two months and it has never been easier to do it then now. I had just about manage to somehow do it successfully twice. Now all I need to do is to overcome SI.
What I did was that I kept going until I got a "push" that didn't give me the head bursting sensation. This time was definitely a bit scarier than the last as along with the muscle spasms I started hearing loud breathing (which was my own) coming from all directions and it felt like a demon had just surrounded me.
Additionally, for each proper attempt I was "choking" for no longer than five seconds, but the effects we're almost instantaneous and you could barely tell when they start setting in.
It wasn't all that bad and now I'm certainly too happy at the moment of having a reliable method to actually commit right now.
Last edited:
