after death

[disorder]

im thinking that it will be very triggering to some family members as they don't know anything from my mental health issues such as my grandparents (i want to keep alive and die after them but i can't wait more years). i'm also sad because of the fact that i will be mainly remembered because of my cause of death but well, it kind of represents my life after all. also i'm scared my wishes of being cremated won't be done, i hate the possibility of my body being placed like that and the ceremony it implicates in my country which in my opinion is kind of traumatic (oh and it's more expensive specially in the city i live)…

also the fact that i would probably ctb in my house when my family is out for a trip or something and the traumatic experience it will be for them to find my dead body in the bed, i wish i could warn them because i definitely would do it

idk why i am thinking of this things like if i'm going to be there to see it all anyways

 

[peacetime]

Well, I think generally speaking people read and respect people's suicide notes and testaments.

 

[disorder]

Well, I think generally speaking people read and respect people's suicide notes and testaments.

ik but i don't know if i want to leave something written as i don't think i have anything to say besides that (i would also find it very difficult and depressing and i think it would be worse if i do it) i have told my parents many times that i want to be cremated but idk if they remember it? or like they would care idk

 

[peacetime]

ik but i don't know if i want to leave something written as i don't think i have anything to say besides that (i would also find it very difficult and depressing and i think it would be worse if i do it) i have told my parents many times that i want to be cremated but idk if they remember it? or like they would care idk

If it were me, I would definitely make sure to write the wish to be cremated on a note or in my will.

 

[disorder]

If it were me, I would definitely make sure to write the wish to be cremated on a note or in my will.

i will look for it in a legal way testament in my country

 

[FuneralCry]

After all, losing people and dealing with loss are simply an inevitable consequence of bringing life into this world. We will all have to die somewhere and lose everything someday. And none of what happens in this world after we are gone could simply never matter to us, it just could never be our concern as we won't be there and I find the thought of this to be quite comforting, personally. So there really isn't much point to worrying about this, but I guess that after all it's difficult to let go of these thoughts.