Venting ADHD & shrink gaslighting

[ALonelyFreak]

Don't worry it's not a real situation it's just a shrink in the internet.

So I've just read a shrink talking about ADHD and trauma/PTSD. He said that the correlation between ADHD and PTSD is very high. Then he proceeded to discuss why it is so. And he basically said it's because ADHD PEOPLE ARE EMOTIONAL. People with ADHD exaggerate what happens to them because they are dysregulated and this results in trauma. They will ruminate about things that a healthy person would quickly forget about.

And I'm like fuck no. Yes we're emotionally dysregulated. But OBJECTIVELY we have harder lives. When you can't focus you struggle at school and with people. People think you're lazy or malicious. And if people don't like you they will harm you. It works like that. You harm people that annoy you. Also we people with ADHD sometimes screw ourselves on our own because we do stupid things while seeking dopamine. All those things increase risk of trauma.
And shrinks wonder why people ctb. Like imagine you come to a shrink after something bad and he tells you that you're emotional. Because there are people who wouldn't mind.
Like why do you care you were bullied for months on end it's over get over it!



Thankfully he aint my shrink.

 

[orpheus_]

It shouldn't be oversimplified like this, like damn there is no single cause like "people with adhd are emotional so they get trauma". As you said there are many factors that make their lives harder. It's just, living with traits that are seen as "character flaws" in today's society. Someone gets told for their whole life that they are lazy (actually has executive dysfunction issues), stupid (unable to focus), too talkative, not enough "down to earth"... No wonder they end up traumatized. Not to mention that some adhd traits may lead to problems with socialising and fuck people REALLY underestimate how being lonely and/or abused by peers during childhood affects you.

Though it may be true that SOME people with ADHD are more prone to trauma because of emotional dysregulation but it's not because they're "exagarrating". Trauma is caused by what a said person, internally, has gone through. If someone struggles with their emotions hard situations WILL be objectively harder for them. Saying that emotionally dysregulated people "exaggarate what happens to them" is kind of like saying that autistics who get overstimulated by loud sounds are "exaggarating". NOPE, they are experiencing this sound in a way that is distressing to them.

But generally speaking, I'm not a professional but my guess would also be that most trauma that people with adhd experience is caused by other things that "emotional dysregulation". Uh I hate it when "professionals" online assign one single cause to a wide problem, ESPECIALLY when that also comes with "advice" like "well just get over it". Also people demonizing emotions? "Everything bad that happens to you just feels bad because you're too emotional". Well my feelings have been completely numbed by depression for a few years and my life is, in fact, much worse than when I used to cry about everything.

 

[amerie]

"People who are neurodivergent are oversensitive and exaggerate what happens to them" = neurodivergent people are a lot more vulnerable to being abused due to systemic ableism and our abusers taking advantage of our lack of social cues or thinking we won't speak out against them or have anyone that will believe us.