Help Ability to cry again?

[Green Destiny]

Growing up I used to be quite the cry baby in my family but then again what child doesn't cry growing up? I cried over hurting myself, losing video games, getting scared when my mom and step dad would fight there's probably plenty more things I cried over. However somewhere down the line I've somewhat disconnected myself from crying. I honestly can't remember the last time I cried or outright bawled myself to exhaustion like I did when I was a child, it's been years I know that much. I think I associated crying with shame and embarrassment and my brain blocked off the ability to do so freely. I feel like if I somehow reconnected that part of myself I would feel a little bit better. Or maybe it'd just make me feel worse haha.

 

[Reallyreallyreally]

Sorry you're dealing with that particular difficulty. I had this problem for years I'm really happy I don't anymore and I hope you get there soon too. It's terrible when you're blocked from your body's emotional pressure valve. Do you think a big bear hug would help get the waterworks going, or maybe a lot of tearjerker movies in a row so you don't have to cry in front of other people?

 

[Green Destiny]

Sorry you're dealing with that particular difficulty. I had this problem for years I'm really happy I don't anymore and I hope you get there soon too. It's terrible when you're blocked from your body's emotional pressure valve. Do you think a big bear hug would help get the waterworks going, or maybe a lot of tearjerker movies in a row so you don't have to cry in front of other people?

There's been a select few times where I was able to shed a few tears but they were far in between, those times also by myself. Maybe I'll try watching some sad things since I'd only feel comfortable doing so by myself and not in other peoples company.

 

[Reallyreallyreally]

There's been a select few times where I was able to shed a few tears but they were far in between, those times also by myself. Maybe I'll try watching some sad things since I'd only feel comfortable doing so by myself and not in other peoples company.

I can 100% relate to this. I found it absolutely humiliating for many years. Not so much anymore. It's maybe level 4 embarrassing now instead of the former level 11.

 

[The Warm Industry]

I have that same problem. I can't shed a single tear it's been almost 4 years. Usually, when I'm feeling frustrated or deep-down sad, I just can groan and scream. And I must say, it's horrible to feel like that. I tried everything. Hugs, therapy, watching very sad things or even trying to remember the worst things on my life and I can't bring myself to cry.

 

[Green Destiny]

I have that same problem. I can't shed a single tear it's been almost 4 years. Usually, when I'm feeling frustrated or deep-down sad, I just can groan and scream. And I must say, it's horrible to feel like that. I tried everything. Hugs, therapy, watching very sad things or even trying to remember the worst things on my life and I can't bring myself to cry.

I yell a lot as well. Especially if I'm alone and frustrated i'll yell pretty loud.

 

[RM5998]

In the last 10 years or so, I've bawled my eyes out once, after getting drunk off my face. Apart from that, I'm pretty much in the same boat.

 

[TAW122]

I feel you and can relate similarly to what you just said.

I had this problem for the last 15+ years and on very rare occasions was I able to cry (even when I fought very hard not to). I suppose that one time I have been hit so hard emotionally that no matter what I did, I just involuntarily cried even as I forced my mind and body to resist every time. Outside of that one time, when I tried to cry, I just couldn't. I'd get close and then nope, no tears. It's frustrating as hell and then afterwards I scream and yell at the top of my lungs at my inability to cry on demand. I could definitely use a good cry though. I just couldn't cry in the presence of people anymore, but alone, yes I managed to do so and then I feel even worse because I wasn't able to cry in front of others, thus proving that I had too high of inhibition and too stoic. (Note: I am not looking for attention nor crying for help when I intend to do it in front of people, but rather a release of stress and pent-up tension.)

Perhaps if I conjured all my most painful memories, regrets, anguish, anger, and all the negatives and injustices and pure powerlessness and hopelessness, then maybe I could just cry (even then, it will be hard) in front of people.

 

[ArtsyDrawer]

Huh.
I'm suffering (?) from the same thing. Glad to see it's a semi-known thing. Last time I cried was... I think two years ago when I had a very bad, for the time, string of seizures, so I went to hide behind a building in the dumpster room and cried there. It smelled of fish.
I like to imagine some did hear me in there but thought "no fucking way I'm approaching a Japanese wailing ghost at 4am!"

Best I can get nowadays is some mild sobbing, kind of like a very sad child who's denied candy or something, but he's very well disciplined, comes from a poor family, and knows that it's either a Snickers, or electricity for the month.
"Maybe next month", he says in between barely noticable sniffles. He knows it's probably not the case, but a man can dream, can't he?

For this I blame the "men don't cry" bullshit drilled in our heads since day one past developing an active consciousness. Sure, stoicism is cool and all, but too much of it leads to a nasty habit of bottling all emotions and not letting a single thing go, which leads to... whatever the fuck this is.

Edit: and then, after enough bottling up, you lose your shit one day and go shoot up a mall or a school or something, and then suicide.

 

[TAW122]

Huh.
I'm suffering (?) from the same thing. Glad to see it's a semi-known thing. Last time I cried was... I think two years ago when I had a very bad, for the time, string of seizures, so I went to hide behind a building in the dumpster room and cried there. It smelled of fish.
I like to imagine some did hear me in there but thought "no fucking way I'm approaching a Japanese wailing ghost at 4am!"

Best I can get nowadays is some mild sobbing, kind of like a very sad child who's denied candy or something, but he's very well disciplined, comes from a poor family, and knows that it's either a Snickers, or electricity for the month.
"Maybe next month", he says in between barely noticable sniffles. He knows it's probably not the case, but a man can dream, can't he?

For this I blame the "men don't cry" bullshit drilled in our heads since day one past developing an active consciousness. Sure, stoicism is cool and all, but too much of it leads to a nasty habit of bottling all emotions and not letting a single thing go, which leads to... whatever the fuck this is.

Edit: and then, after enough bottling up, you lose your shit one day and go shoot up a mall or a school or something, and then suicide.

Yeah well said, I don't agree with "be a man" or the "man up" culture. I mean, sure there are some niche instances where it may be necessary, but a man has to have an outlet too, and it's not always socially sanctioned ones or cliche ones like "go exercise more!", "go take a shower!", "go take a walk!", etc.

 

[vesttigeel]

Growing up I used to be quite the cry baby in my family but then again what child doesn't cry growing up? I cried over hurting myself, losing video games, getting scared when my mom and step dad would fight there's probably plenty more things I cried over. However somewhere down the line I've somewhat disconnected myself from crying. I honestly can't remember the last time I cried or outright bawled myself to exhaustion like I did when I was a child, it's been years I know that much. I think I associated crying with shame and embarrassment and my brain blocked off the ability to do so freely. I feel like if I somehow reconnected that part of myself I would feel a little bit better. Or maybe it'd just make me feel worse haha.

I can relate... I haven't properly cried since I was little. Something that helps though, if you can, is thinking of fond memories you have of family members who have passed away - recently or otherwise. It connects to both that childhood nostalgia and also the realisation that you wish that person hadn't died, it makes the whole experience more cry-worthy. Hope this helps a bit.