It's all just so dreadful to me, I'll always see it as such a terrible tragedy how this existence was imposed and I was forced to suffer so unnecessarily as a result, to me existence truly is the most cruel, futile and torturous imposition that just causes suffering all for the sake of it and problems there were never any need for even know there were no disadvantages to never suffering at all, existence to me is an abomination and I suffer so much because I was forced into existence.
I see it as something so harmful to be conscious in this existence capable of suffering to unlimited amounts destined for nothing but to decay and die anyway, human existence always feels like a terrible, cruel mistake to me and it's something I wish I never was forced into more than anything. I never should have been forced into this existence and I see so much cruelty in how even know this existence was so harmfully imposed causing so much suffering as a result, there isn't the option for me to just simply cease existing in peace with suffering seen as to force and prolong no matter what, to me human existence really is enslavement.