Venting you ever wanna cbt as revenge?

[kenma0]

someone has hurt me so bad that i just want them to see that i am cbting just to make them feel miserable. make them feel the same way they made me feel. make them feel the pain i endured through their actions.

i really do want to die. living with what happened to me and seeing them move on like its nothing. im angry, im hurt, im depressed. i want them to known what they fucking did. im sitting on my couch crying right now because of it. and they dont care. they never cared about me. and i cared about them more than anything. why do people use and play with others like its nothing?

and now i have to live in the same life where that person gets happiness and gratification with someone else while i sit here in mental agony and distress 24/7? i want them to see me die and have to live with that in the back of their mind. i want them to feel at fault.

is it cruel of me? maybe. but i dont care. i want them to know if i die soon, its their fault.
this is a huge vent post btw. it .. isnt right to blame someone for your own death, your own actions. but im just so angry. i want them to know how much they fucked me up.

 

[turnaround]

It's cruel, but isn't that the point? I think as long as the choice is yours to ctb, the way you choose to deal with it is up to you.

I am leaving letters to people who I love and who have wronged me. There needs to be consequences for peoples actions. They can't get off Scott free while the people they hurt suffer and have to leave this world.

I hope for some when they see mt death it haunts them. It lets them know they did something wrong.

 

[kenma0]

It's cruel, but isn't that the point? I think as long as the choice is yours to ctb, the way you choose to deal with it is up to you.

I am leaving letters to people who I love and who have wronged me. There needs to be consequences for peoples actions. They can't get off Scott free while the people they hurt suffer and have to leave this world.

I hope for some when they see mt death it haunts them. It lets them know they did something wrong.

if i die, i want to post a story. i wouldnt mention what that person did to me, or even address them. i know they would see it, and be able to do nothing about it. i would want to let my loved ones know anyway.

im sorry you were wronged. you didnt deserve it, and i hope whoever wronged you feels haunted.

 

[ma0]

I'm very torn between simply going missing versus personally making a huge list of everyone who has wronged me, and taping it to the edge of the pier in my town for local news to find.

It's a bit barbaric, but I like to fantasize. However, I do think just the act of CTB can traumatize people enough. The whole "watch me do it" thing is still an option though, if you wanna cause life ruining damage.

 

[oneeyed]

You're the only one here that knows this person but if they hurt you and they're going about their life like nothing happened, it's possible they wouldn't care whether you're alive or dead or how it happened. If the person is as narcissistic as it sounds, your ctb would just roll off their back. How people can do that is a mystery to me. This isn't too discourage you, just that it's possible it wouldn't be the ultimate revenge you're hoping for.

 

[ScaredOfMachines]

I feel like CTBing as revenge to be kind of pointless. If someone's willing to use people as toys and mess them up, they won't care if they get broken.

It would be nice to let other people know what they did and who they really are though. I remember playing a game a couple years ago where a group of students bullied someone into suicide, and felt no guilt after the fact. But then another character starts threatening to reveal what they did years after they've graduated, gotten married, had kids, etc, and they start panicking because the news getting out would ruin their careers, cause their spouses to leave them, etc. Having some sort of karmic retribution like that happen after my death would be amazing, but I feel like the world just wouldn't care in reality.

 

[yowai]

I think it would be stupid to do it just to spite someone cause it might turn out they wouldn't care at all and not feel responsible.

 

[jan28]

I'd like to minimize the damage when I go. I don't see the point of spreading the suffering to other people.

 

[Blue Dream]

someone has hurt me so bad that i just want them to see that i am cbting just to make them feel miserable. make them feel the same way they made me feel. make them feel the pain i endured through their actions.

i really do want to die. living with what happened to me and seeing them move on like its nothing. im angry, im hurt, im depressed. i want them to known what they fucking did. im sitting on my couch crying right now because of it. and they dont care. they never cared about me. and i cared about them more than anything. why do people use and play with others like its nothing?

and now i have to live in the same life where that person gets happiness and gratification with someone else while i sit here in mental agony and distress 24/7? i want them to see me die and have to live with that in the back of their mind. i want them to feel at fault.

is it cruel of me? maybe. but i dont care. i want them to know if i die soon, its their fault.
this is a huge vent post btw. it .. isnt right to blame someone for your own death, your own actions. but im just so angry. i want them to know how much they fucked me up.

It's said that the opposite of love isn't hate but indifference. If you hate him are you ok with him living rent free in your head and with giving up your future over him? There are people that would actually brag about wrecking someone like this.

Don't let him have that kind of power over you.

 

[Forveleth]

I'm sorry this has happened to you. I have been pushed further into depression by the hurtful acts of people I trusted and thought loved me.

However, I do not see the point in this being a motivating factor for killing yourself. You do not know how they will interpret it. They may not even care when they find out you are dead. Then what? Your death was for nothing. If you want to get them where it hurts, you move on and live your best life completely without them, like they never existed. I know it is easy to say and very difficult to do but no one should control how you live and certainly no one should control why you die.

 

[dontwakemeup]

I'm sorry you're in pain and suffering. Whoever wronged you I'm sure is sleeping fine at night and not giving any thought about you. I don't mean to sound harsh, trust me I deal with the same emotions and feelings.

Suicide is you're personal decision. If that person doesn't seem to care now then in your death I doubt they would care then.

Regarding suicide notes. If you're found by the police they will keep your note, analyze it and decide if they want to give it to that person, it's not guaranteed they will.

My only advice is what I've chosen to do. Cut off all communication with that person, avoid any contact, and try to find a way to move on in a healthy way. You will always have these feelings, they will never go away, try to use them as motivation to do great things.

 

[rozeske]

It would have been just and felt nice if the people that wronged us were affected by our suicide and feel even the fraction of the pain we felt but such people generally aren't the type to feel remorse over their actions, might even get pleasure out of it. I think it all comes down to what you want to do with your life. I'd say let karma get them as they claim karma is a bitch but I'm starting to believe she's a slow blind bitch. None of it really matters once we're gone anyways.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I first became suicidal because of bullying by a family member. I wanted to die to escape them and because I was so unhappy but yes, I drafted a note where I blamed them!

Really though, I believe they were/ are a narcissist. They were forever pretending to be the victim themselves so, I think it's worth realising that, whatever you hope for, may not actually even work.

Some people are capable of framing the most incriminating circumstances centering them as the perpetraitor so that they become the persecuted. So: 'I can't believe this person is trying to pin their death on me. But then- that's all they've ever done- tried to get me into trouble. Tried to blame their own problems on me.' So, effectively: Feel sorry for me everyone! Not only am I having to deal with grief because of the passing of this person (which they'll probably pretend to now care about,) but, now I have this (misplaced) guilt to live with. (Even though you have to genuinely feel you are guilty to feel guilt and- they may well not believe it is their fault but, they'll possibly say so for effect.)

Some people love attention so- bear in mind- this may actually simply give them what they want! It's going to depend on how good they are at convincing people they're the good person in all of this but I'm not convinced everyone does feel remorse, shame or guilt even.

 

[DegenerateLoser]

someone has hurt me so bad that i just want them to see that i am cbting just to make them feel miserable. make them feel the same way they made me feel. make them feel the pain i endured through their actions.

i really do want to die. living with what happened to me and seeing them move on like its nothing. im angry, im hurt, im depressed. i want them to known what they fucking did. im sitting on my couch crying right now because of it. and they dont care. they never cared about me. and i cared about them more than anything. why do people use and play with others like its nothing?

and now i have to live in the same life where that person gets happiness and gratification with someone else while i sit here in mental agony and distress 24/7? i want them to see me die and have to live with that in the back of their mind. i want them to feel at fault.

is it cruel of me? maybe. but i dont care. i want them to know if i die soon, its their fault.
this is a huge vent post btw. it .. isnt right to blame someone for your own death, your own actions. but im just so angry. i want them to know how much they fucked me up.

I would much rather have them feel the pain that I endured in your case and taking your own life in an act of revenge seems too extreme. If you're going to end your life regardless you should use your last days of living to make their life a living hell before you go.

 

[kenma0]

I would much rather have them feel the pain that I endured in your case and taking your own life in an act of revenge seems too extreme. If you're going to end your life regardless you should use your last days of living to make their life a living hell before you go.

haha yeah. i know its quite extreme, i dont particularly like the idea, of ctbing just solely because someone hurt me. the truth is i am wanting to die for multiple reasons. but... i like your idea!

 

[The_Hunter]

I am so sorry to hear that you have been hurt so horribly.

Anger is a blackhole to infinity. It can never be satisfied, and the more we fall into it, the more it destroys us and infuriates us.

It's ok to be angry, but when we give ourselves to anger, we lose ourselves, too, and that's not ideal.

It's also not preferable to leave existence based off a grudge for one person; it shouldn't be based on impulse, imo.

Hope you're able to heal from the pain they caused you, and that you're able to forget about it as much as possible. Please take care of yourself. Best of luck.

 

[fairykitty]

i understand completely. i have almost gone through with the exact same thing myself… but honestly they're such a shitty person they'd get over it quick and have no guilt, so i didn't go through with it. i think i made the right choice.

if i'm going out i want it to not be influenced by other people, but my own pain. i don't want anyone to have that power over me but in that moment of rage i nearly did. instead for now im living to spite them, until my own pain gets so bad i can't take it anymore, then i will decide to go

i wish nothing but the best for you

 

[FireFox]

someone has hurt me so bad that i just want them to see that i am cbting just to make them feel miserable. make them feel the same way they made me feel. make them feel the pain i endured through their actions.

i really do want to die. living with what happened to me and seeing them move on like its nothing. im angry, im hurt, im depressed. i want them to known what they fucking did. im sitting on my couch crying right now because of it. and they dont care. they never cared about me. and i cared about them more than anything. why do people use and play with others like its nothing?

and now i have to live in the same life where that person gets happiness and gratification with someone else while i sit here in mental agony and distress 24/7? i want them to see me die and have to live with that in the back of their mind. i want them to feel at fault.

is it cruel of me? maybe. but i dont care. i want them to know if i die soon, its their fault.
this is a huge vent post btw. it .. isnt right to blame someone for your own death, your own actions. but im just so angry. i want them to know how much they fucked me up.

@kenma0 Enormous virtual hug OP Revenge is NEVER worth it OP no arsehole worth you killing yourself. This person won't care if you do trust me. The truth is there is no such thing as Karma the world lied to us believing it is real. The truth is people who destroy other people's lives forget the person they ruined while living there best lives.

It's so messed how our world is full of people who dont care about other people's feelings and discard others as if they are household waste. This world is so depraved. OP You are not alone believe me there people who understand what you are going through because I went through something similar with someone I really loved and cared about who meesed up with my feelings. The arsehole messed up my life in 2023 and he got everything he wanted. It makes me sick knowing he got away with it all.

I was once so angry and upset everyday what the man i loved put me through. At 25 I feel in love with a 55 year old man. I cared about this man and showed him nothing but kindness. What did he do ? He told lies about me to other people in the workplace while pretending to be nice me and his lies made my life hell at work. Management thought I was a trouble marker, he turned the workplace against me and he played a role in getting driven out of the workplace. I was struggling in my job but his lying made me it worse.

I had a well paying job, independence and I was finally blossoming at 25 then that arsehole took it all away.

Look OP your pain is real and is torturing you but if you ctb to make them feel bad they won't care. People like that see people like you as disposable. These arseholes are truly the devil on earth.

OP you deserve so much better and deserve all the happiness in the world.

Love
FireFox :)

It would have been just and felt nice if the people that wronged us were affected by our suicide and feel even the fraction of the pain we felt but such people generally aren't the type to feel remorse over their actions, might even get pleasure out of it. I think it all comes down to what you want to do with your life. I'd say let karma get them as they claim karma is a bitch but I'm starting to believe she's a slow blind bitch. None of it really matters once we're gone anyways.

@rozeske This is why I hate 13 reasons why so much because the show sends a false message to teenagers and young people that people will care that a person choose to kill themselves. I hate how movies and TV shows spread this narrative over how everyone cares if you kill yourself it's simply not true.

The reality is people move on and not everyone values other people's existence. I hate how growing up society and our parents failed to teach us.