Z

ZeitZuGehen

Member
Oct 29, 2018
19
Recently my plans to ctb have become more explicit, so yesterday I officially left the church and checked out a location to jump from. Turn out that it's perfect, 180 juicy meters on asphalt with barely anyone around (at least at night). Tbh it has been long since I've been so happy about something.
That doesn't necessarily mean that I will ctb right away, this just means that I don't have to worry about how I could possibly ctb anymore.
I feel relieved. I now have a permanent opportunity to end my life within two hours with a success rate of a close to 100%. I can concentrate on other things now, like my will, suicide note etc. so that I'll be ready when it's time to go.
 
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ctoan

ctoan

Arcanist
Sep 30, 2018
437
is it a bridge?
 
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TiredHorse

Enlightened
Nov 1, 2018
1,819
I feel relieved. I now have a permanent opportunity to end my life within two hours with a success rate of a close to 100%. I can concentrate on other things now, like my will, suicide note etc. so that I'll be ready when it's time to go.
Isn't that sense of relief amazing? I've always had guns --grew up with them-- so I've always had that option, but I remember the relief when I brought home the tank of N2, my chosen method. It's quite something.
 
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Xerxes

Xerxes

Invisible
Nov 8, 2018
936
Swan dive, head first. Do legs first and you'll feel what it's like to have a bone go up your ass, and then die.
 
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OkTotti

Wizard
Nov 6, 2018
616
i have access to high rise hotels which I can jump to. I actually found an airbnb on a really high floor (39), death would almost be guaranteed. I wonder if I have the courage to finally take the leap. Do you have any fear of jumping from high heights?
 
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Schopenhauer

Enlightened
Oct 3, 2018
1,133
Settling on a method always have a soothing effect. Ironically, thinking about suicide kept me alive and reasonably sane for 16 years.
 
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ZeitZuGehen

Member
Oct 29, 2018
19
i have access to high rise hotels which I can jump to. I actually found an airbnb on a really high floor (39), death would almost be guaranteed. I wonder if I have the courage to finally take the leap. Do you have any fear of jumping from high heights?
Yes, I have fear, but that's the case with almost every method. After all, it's in the human nature to avoid damage on your body. But I think I will be able to do it, since the act of jumping itself only requires a small impuls, gravity will take care of the rest.
 
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OkTotti

Wizard
Nov 6, 2018
616
Yes, I have fear, but that's the case with almost every method. After all, it's in the human nature to avoid damage on your body. But I think I will be able to do it, since the act of jumping itself only requires a small impuls, gravity will take care of the rest.
I think jumping is my preferred CTB method, what made you decide jumping rather than hanging or drinking N.?
 
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ZeitZuGehen

Member
Oct 29, 2018
19
I think jumping is my preferred CTB method, what made you decide jumping rather than hanging or drinking N.?
I don't like hanging because I would probably not pull through and I also fear that I would survive and end up as a vegetable.
I haven't looked too much into chemicals in general because my country has strong laws concerning dangerous substances. Apart from that I again fear that I could survive. The reason I like jumping is because of the guaranteed physical destruction of the body.
Also judging from this source it's quite effective:
http://www.lostallhope.com/suicide-methods/statistics-most-lethal-methods
http://www.lostallhope.com/suicide-methods/jumping-high-building

Also: do you have any plans to call paramedics before you jump? I am not quite sure if I should since the other option would be that some poor random guy finds me, a professional could certainly handle the picture better.
 
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