KIRBYGHOST
Turnt Member
- Dec 9, 2023
- 42
no prefix. not much to say or discuss, nor to ask for. no more lying to myself. no more crying for myself. no more moping, no more panicking, no more of anything.
no more hypomanic episodes, no more psychotic breaks, no more depressive episodes, no more writing to myself. as of last night, i don't see a reason to dwell on anything. and i'm not, either. as of last night, i'm done with feeling this way. i'm done with everything in & out. i'm not sad anymore. i'm not mad anymore. i'm not hungry anymore. i'm not able to be aroused anymore. i don't want affection. i've given up on love. i'm not motivated to do anything anymore. i don't want to change. everything that has been dying for me, has done so. i'm no longer in pain. i'm no longer going to continue fighting. i don't consider myself to be suffering anymore.
no more recovery. there's no drive to keep me going. i'm going to die alone, and you know what, i might just make sure i do that soon. i know exactly how i'm gonna do that, step-by-step. i'm not interested in harming myself, i feel like that's all pointless. nothing to distract me, because everything to me now is dull. there's no point. it's been a very long time since i've been so clear-minded like i am now. this isn't an episode
no more being a good person, nor more being concerned if i'm a bad person. no more hiding. no more masking up. no more being concerned about isolation nor being social. i don't care about what others think of me, think for me, and think because of me. i'm not overwhelmed with any kind of emotion. i don't feel anything anymore
i'm just done
no more hypomanic episodes, no more psychotic breaks, no more depressive episodes, no more writing to myself. as of last night, i don't see a reason to dwell on anything. and i'm not, either. as of last night, i'm done with feeling this way. i'm done with everything in & out. i'm not sad anymore. i'm not mad anymore. i'm not hungry anymore. i'm not able to be aroused anymore. i don't want affection. i've given up on love. i'm not motivated to do anything anymore. i don't want to change. everything that has been dying for me, has done so. i'm no longer in pain. i'm no longer going to continue fighting. i don't consider myself to be suffering anymore.
no more recovery. there's no drive to keep me going. i'm going to die alone, and you know what, i might just make sure i do that soon. i know exactly how i'm gonna do that, step-by-step. i'm not interested in harming myself, i feel like that's all pointless. nothing to distract me, because everything to me now is dull. there's no point. it's been a very long time since i've been so clear-minded like i am now. this isn't an episode
no more being a good person, nor more being concerned if i'm a bad person. no more hiding. no more masking up. no more being concerned about isolation nor being social. i don't care about what others think of me, think for me, and think because of me. i'm not overwhelmed with any kind of emotion. i don't feel anything anymore
i'm just done
