Worthless (value/use)

[Life_and_Death]

I'm putting this here because I guess it's like..... Idk I'm just gonna let my fingers type what my brain is thinking.

My friend and I had a conversation the other day and I said that I feel worthless. And he said "you're not useless" or something like that. (wow my fingers can't keep up) anyway if I remember right (this was a few days ago and I don't feel like going back to check right now) we had shared like..... Maaaaybe 5 messages before I finally googled worthless. And I said "ah I see." he thought I meant I feel useless. No I feel like I physically have no value. I wish I could explain this feeling. It's not an empty feeling but it's almost like empty but like a different kind of empty. (Im not so sure I should have gotten stoned)(clearly not I f'ed up and clicked post lol) I just wonder how does something of "no value" not feel worthless. And who even decides what everything is worth. You can walk into 2 different stores in the same city, forget different fucking countries... And find different prices on the EXACT SAME ITEM. Yet all people are suppose to be priceless however we can't sell people (nope nope nope way off track wow) I just don't understand how I'm suppose to feel worth..... Ya know?

 

[Deleted member 94]

There are different ways of defining worth, to my family my mum was worthless to me she was a treasure beyond measure.

 

[Life_and_Death]

There are different ways of defining worth, to my family my mum was worthless to me she was a treasure beyond measure.

That was kind of my point. You can be worthless as in having no monetary value or be worthless like "worthless piece of junk doesn't work right" (useless). I feel useful. I'm good at a lot of different things. Hell I'm basically renovating my whole trailer, the way I looked at it is if they can do it why can't i? It's the monetary value I have a problem with..... Like instead of selling myself I'd just give myself away because I don't understand my "worth".

 

[Deleted member 94]

Have you ever tried looking at jobs you can do, reading the job specs etc and then what monetary value is the most, that's a good way to find out. If that is your point.

There are plenty of well paying jobs which require no experience. If you lack experience, but if you can renovate, that's a huge skill to have.

Whereas my point was that even my mum was treated as worthless and this was by family members for whom she sacrificed herself, money isn't the only measure of a person, the size of their heart is to me.

 

[Life_and_Death]

money isn't the only measure of a person, the size of their heart is to me.

Can you maybe explain this more to me? If you were to ask the people that know me they'd probably say I have a pretty big heart. I even tell my brothers that I had to grow an extra heart to hold all my love for them lol.

 

[Deleted member 94]

Yes I can, the city I live in has a north south divide with a river going through it in the middle. I once went on a charity run through north, south and middle. The north is poor, the middle is working upstarts and south is super rich who don't even have to work. Guess who gave me more money for the charitable cause. The cause incase you are wondering was to take kids of the streets in Brazil before they are exploited for various purposes.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Yes I can, the city I live in has a north south divide with a river going through it in the middle. I once went on a charity run through north, south and middle. The north is poor, the middle is working upstarts and south is super rich who don't even have to work. Guess who gave me more money for the charitable cause. The cause incase you are wondering was to take kids of the streets in Brazil before they are exploited for various purposes.

I'm gonna have to guess north or middle. I'm kind of leaning towards middle because they can afford it more but my thinking behind it is they have a better understanding of the hurt the world is in then the rich people because it seems to me rich people try to hide the pain with a pretty picture like it isn't there. (at least that's what tv portrays I don't see a lot of rich people)

 

[Deleted member 94]

It was north first, middle second and I think I can only remember one teenage girl signing up in the south.

 

[Life_and_Death]

It was north first, middle second and I think I can only remember one teenage girl signing up in the south.

Yeah, I was guessing north but you said they were poor so I didn't want to assume they could afford to be first, that's not their fault. In a case like that it reminds me of that's story

One person donated 5$ and someone else donated 20$ everyone congratulated the one that gave 20 but the one that gave 20 had 30 more sitting in the bank and the other person.... Gave their last 5

 

[Deleted member 94]

Remember I told you about my mum being a treasure, well when my brother needed money she would empty her savings whereas my dad always kept his banks seperate from my mom and would never dip in them to help out.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Remember I told you about my mum being a treasure, well when my brother needed money she would empty her savings whereas my dad always kept his banks seperate from my mom and would never dip in them to help out.

I can kind of understand, everyone has their own bills to worry about. But I have a feeling the way you're talking this isn't the case.

 

[Deleted member 94]

I

I can kind of understand, everyone has their own bills to worry about. But I have a feeling the way you're talking this isn't the case.

I don't understand are you referring to the difference between my mum and dad.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I

I don't understand are you referring to the difference between my mum and dad.

Let me elaborate a bit more. Maybe that will help.

I can understand why your dad might not want to spend the money. He has his own heat/lights, food, stuff like that to worry about. It's one thing to help out with extra change but it's a bit much for someone to expect you to put yourself in trouble.

However the way you are talking about them it seems like that money he's "saving" isn't completely for that. maybe none at all, I don't want to assume the guy plays the bills. It could be a case where the money is all his and your mom is paying the bills and helping your brother.

Basically just referring to all the different possibilities for the situation considering you haven't specified the situation.

 

[Deleted member 94]

My dad is loaded he has the money just doesn't want to part with it. He's like it's my money get your own.

 

[Life_and_Death]

My dad is loaded he has the money just doesn't want to part with it. He's like it's my money get your own.

yeah i had a feeling it was more of a situation like that.

 

[MrBlue]

I'm putting this here because I guess it's like..... Idk I'm just gonna let my fingers type what my brain is thinking.

My friend and I had a conversation the other day and I said that I feel worthless. And he said "you're not useless" or something like that. (wow my fingers can't keep up) anyway if I remember right (this was a few days ago and I don't feel like going back to check right now) we had shared like..... Maaaaybe 5 messages before I finally googled worthless. And I said "ah I see." he thought I meant I feel useless. No I feel like I physically have no value. I wish I could explain this feeling. It's not an empty feeling but it's almost like empty but like a different kind of empty. (Im not so sure I should have gotten stoned)(clearly not I f'ed up and clicked post lol) I just wonder how does something of "no value" not feel worthless. And who even decides what everything is worth. You can walk into 2 different stores in the same city, forget different fucking countries... And find different prices on the EXACT SAME ITEM. Yet all people are suppose to be priceless however we can't sell people (nope nope nope way off track wow) I just don't understand how I'm suppose to feel worth..... Ya know?

I can definitely relate. I sometimes feel I can be useful, but I've never been valuable as a person to anyone outside of my immediate family, and that's more familiarity rather than who I am as a person.

You can use something without investing money/time/effort into that thing. I occasionally use wikipedia or watch youtubers but I'm not gonna donate to them any time soon. I'm basically the human equivalent.

 

[Deleted member 94]

yeah i had a feeling it was more of a situation like that.

But to be entirely fair on him he does help out with non financial stuff now that he's retired, like my brother has a young family with both parents working so he brings the kids from school and looks after them until one of the parents come back. I'm sorry if I painted a dark picture of him. He has his moments.

 

[Life_and_Death]

But to be entirely fair on him he does help out with non financial stuff now that he's retired, like my brother has a young family with both parents working so he brings the kids from school and looks after them until one of the parents come back. I'm sorry if I painted a dark picture of him. He has his moments.

thats helpful yes, but if someone is really struggling to the point where your SO empties their pockets to help them when you can afford to.......why dont you? i understand its never gonna happen but if everyone helped everyone then the would would have a lot less problems and everyone would be "rich". some people just need to be better then others i guess. (not directed at your dad just rich people in general)

 

[Deleted member 94]

Someone on this site said only a fraction of American wealth could wipe out world hunger but we still have world hunger. I would do it if I had the money, my mum as a child used to take me outside if she saw anyone begging outside a church let's say she would give them money and turn to me and say they give you blessings.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Someone on this site said only a fraction of American wealth could wipe out world hunger but we still have world hunger. I would do it if I had the money, my mum as a child used to take me outside of she saw anyone begging outside a church let's say she would give them money and turn to me and say they give you blessings.

your mom sounds like a really sweet person

 

[Deleted member 94]

Was she passed away in August 2017.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Was she passed away in August 2017.

aww......you need all the hugs

well she seems to live on in you. thank you for helping me today she raised a great person

 

[Deleted member 94]

Thanks, I don't know how or when I helped.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Thanks, I don't know how or when I helped.

well, heres some things ive done in the past.
ive bought a sandwich for a homeless guy a few times
i helped 2 birds
every day i talk to people with mental illnesses and trying to help them
i raised my brother when i was in my early teens (i didnt have to but he was my brother so it kinda counts i feel)
i donate stuff to the animal shelter
basically i help out when ever i can and by showing me the connection between you and your mother and the things she did, it made me feel a little better
oh and if it stops raining and i see a worm out ill put it in the grass so it wont die (i cant save them all but i try lol)

 

[Deleted member 94]

Oh I see now. Thanks for clarifying.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Oh I see now. Thanks for clarifying.

basically you showed me that the value kind of worth isnt always money, it can be emotional too :)

 

[Amumu]

What you call the "monetary value" just means you sell your "work" to a private company (wage-earning) or to the state (civil servant)
Basically it's just about your ability to be a seller. Are you a good seller? Yes? Good job. No? You shouldn't be ashamed about it.

Of course if we talk about inherited money then it's more about the "monetary value" of some ancestors...

While the "non-monetary value" seems to be more subjective. In my opinion it could be "the ability to help others".

Both aren't linked. Someone can have a catastrophic monetary value while having the best "non-monetary value"
Someone can have a catastrophic "non-monetary value" while having the best "monetary value".
Example : Me because I used to be rather good at work but I have no social skills so I'm no use to others.
I'd rather have both but I do what I can...

We could add a third type of value which is absolute...
If someone is human, then they have an absolute value. Fuck misanthropy.
And even if they don't work well and don't help others.

 

[Niftypoint124]

We could add a third type of value which is absolute...
If someone is human, then they have an absolute value. Fuck misanthropy.
And even if they don't work well and don't help others.

Your last line is so important, imo. Everyone has value, whether or not they are doing something that "proves" it.

 

[Weather]

First, I confess to not reading the previous responses; sorry if I'm beating an old drum.

But... I saw use and value and immediately thought we were going to have a conversation about Marxism. And I'm obviously here for it. ;)

I feel like what you are expressing, at least in part, is feeling like a commodity rather than a human being -- because human beings have an inherent worth that does not rely upon what we do or how others see us. So, setting that aside, if you want to frame yourself as a commodity -- let's talk use-value and exchange value. One's use value as a human will always exist because there is always the human possibility of action; one's use-value is connected to the purposes you may be put to and even if you have not acted before (although of course you have), you may do so in the future in a multitude of powerful and beneficial ways. Use-value is the real, authentic value that one has (if, again, one is a commodity).

But this does not seem to be how you are willing to define yourself, so let's talk about exchange value. The exchange value is connected to the time and effort that has been put into a commodity and the value others are willing to put on you (as a commodity). And this seems to be where you are defining yourself without much value. It's not about you, it's about the time and effort others have put into you. You, perhaps, see that others have not cared and committed enough and see it as a reflection of your worth; therefore you see yourself as having a low value. But, this is not true as your true worth would be found in your use-value, which remains filled with possibility.

 

[hoping to lose hope]

I'm putting this here because I guess it's like..... Idk I'm just gonna let my fingers type what my brain is thinking.

My friend and I had a conversation the other day and I said that I feel worthless. And he said "you're not useless" or something like that. (wow my fingers can't keep up) anyway if I remember right (this was a few days ago and I don't feel like going back to check right now) we had shared like..... Maaaaybe 5 messages before I finally googled worthless. And I said "ah I see." he thought I meant I feel useless. No I feel like I physically have no value. I wish I could explain this feeling. It's not an empty feeling but it's almost like empty but like a different kind of empty. (Im not so sure I should have gotten stoned)(clearly not I f'ed up and clicked post lol) I just wonder how does something of "no value" not feel worthless. And who even decides what everything is worth. You can walk into 2 different stores in the same city, forget different fucking countries... And find different prices on the EXACT SAME ITEM. Yet all people are suppose to be priceless however we can't sell people (nope nope nope way off track wow) I just don't understand how I'm suppose to feel worth..... Ya know?

The reality is that humans have as much value as pond scum and it is actually within our social construct that we give value to anyone.
A schizophrenic in the west may be considered to have less value but in a mystic culture where they are regarded as shamans their value is immense.
I guess the only real value each of us actually possesses is how much nutrients we provide the soil and various forms of life that will use our body after we do not need it anymore.
There is no right answer I personally value people for the art they produce much more than the money they make.