Venting Workplace conflict

[BaconCheeseburger]

Hey guys, I just need to vent because I'm in a bit of a rough place (...but then again, aren't we all? XD).

I have this colleague. And I absolutely cannot stand him. Every single thing he does drives me insane. He does things wrong and when I question them he fights back at me. In my eyes he is a piece of shit.

I've gone to my manager several times to complain, and they're aware that he's a bit of a hyperactive oddball (my polite words, not theirs). But I seem to be the only one from my team complaining, and I'm starting to wonder if I'm the one with the problem if everyone else can tolerate him. I'm pent up enough as it is with my need to CTB, and he just tops it all off... But why is noone else reacting the same way I do? Why do I have to be the one who needs to overdose on Pregabalin just to get by on a shift with him??

I feel bad that I'm the only one who has an issue, because I feel like a whiney bitch now. Still doesn't mean I like him, because I stand by the fact that he really gets on my nerves. But if it's a 'me' problem rather than a 'him' problem, how the fuck can I not keep feeling like this?

My manager wants me to sit down and talk with this guy, with manager as a mediator, but I can just see that ending with me crying and admitting that it's all in my head or something, so if possible I'd like to avoid that. It's just building up though and I know one day I will just stand up and walk out of work. Only for an hour or so but there's only so much Pregabalin I can take (!).

Can anyone convince me that I'm not just a hateful bitch with no reason to be angry?

 

[Nofaith]

You're not an angry hateful bitch lol.

His behaviour is affecting you more because you're feeling quite sensitive now, with everything you have going on. You're more attuned to it than your colleagues.

The mediating sounds great, but from personal experience, not a great idea when you already feel vulnerable and sensitive.

Worse case scenario the emotions completely take over and you're left crying, with your guard completely down.

I wish I could suggest an alternative option.

 

[BaconCheeseburger]

You're not an angry hateful bitch lol.
The mediating sounds great, but from personal experience, not a great idea when you already feel vulnerable and sensitive.

Thanks for replying. I feel like whenever I post on here for support which isn't directly related to CTB-ing, people either don't know what to say or they can't be bothered to reach out (no offense to you guys, I don't know where I'd be without this site but I have nowhere else to let off steam about issues... I kind of just feel irrelevant everywhere).

I could barely get my words out to my manager without feeling my face flush and I was sweating like mad. Don't think I want to do that with two men in the room.

I really think I'm just gonna have to keep quiet and medicate the fuck out of myself.

 

[Nofaith]

Thanks for replying. I feel like whenever I post on here for support which isn't directly related to CTB-ing, people either don't know what to say or they can't be bothered to reach out (no offense to you guys, I don't know where I'd be without this site but I have nowhere else to let off steam about issues... I kind of just feel irrelevant everywhere).

I could barely get my words out to my manager without feeling my face flush and I was sweating like mad. Don't think I want to do that with two men in the room.

I really think I'm just gonna have to keep quiet and medicate the fuck out of myself.

No worries.

From my perspective I'm usually unable to reply because I haven't had experience. But with this I've been here.

It might not be so bad if you had another colleague backing you. But the general attitude in the workplace is keep calm, don't complain.

And no matter how much you tell yourself don't get worked up, don't cry, the faucet starts and there's no shutting it off. You're left feeling weak having broke down in front of strangers.

Best you can hope is, this employee meses up so badly, the manager steps in of their own volition.

 

[Schopenhauer]

You're not a hateful bitch. But you are going through a time fraught with emotions. So you may overreact sometimes.

Have you tried talking to your other coworkers about him? Try to see what they think about him. Don't badmouth him to them (you don't want to be known for that), just try to gauge their opinions.