Venting Wishing to permanently escape from all suffering is just having awareness

[FuneralCry]

Seeing existence as being something so undesirable and preferring the freedom of non-existence is just having awareness, hating existence is just being realistic as existence is so futile and harmful.

And this is why it's ironic to me how wanting to die is seen as something to "recover" from when in reality wanting to avoid all future suffering is something perfectly logical, I see the true delusional thing as wishing to exist in this nightmarish world where there is unlimited potential to suffer endlessly, existence disturbs me and this mindset isn't something to "recover" from as it's just being aware, it's seeing existence for what it truly is.

Wishing to die isn't what the problem is but rather existence is, there's nothing desirable about existing, existing is something very hopeless that just leads to even more suffering.

The thought of being trapped here for potentially decades fills me with dread, under no circumstances could I ever wish to decay from age, existence is just a horrific and tragic mistake.
Wanting to be free from all future suffering could never be an irrational way to feel and it shouldn't be seen as such, I don't see suffering as being acceptable.

 

[アホペンギン]

I agree with you. Yearning for nonexistence, to me, is being aware of all the unavoidable and uncalled for hopeless suffering that comes with life. I see that wanting nonexistence should be treated just as how wanting to exist is treated, it should never be labeled as irrational and the easy way out, it is only a defense mechanism, to avoid all of the futility in this world.

 

[day]

I truly find life has no purpose and it's insufferable. Bit and pieces of life has seemed enjoyable but overall existing is horrible. I wish that I could just peacefully exit this grotesque world reliably but it seems like it will be awhile if ever that we get N on the market again. Life is so undesirable.

 

[thatworthlessmale04]

I fully agree. I first had this revelation when I was 15 (I'm 19 now), and it's like each day I get closer and closer to making that final, deep push to finally escape from this meaningless life that I've lived.

 

[josephk]

I'm 51. Most of those years have been spent in distress. I haven't enjoyed life. If I could get out painlessly i would. One day I'll pluck up the courage to finish it