Wish I felt brave enough to take SN

[aGoodDayToDie]

SN really scares me bit it's the best method I have left. Gas didn't work, tried many times. Partial didn't work, tried many times. The symptoms of SN poisoning really scare me. For sure, you feel like you're dying. I wish I could get good heroin instead. Even that would scare me, idk how to prepare it and using needles really scares me but I've always been ripped off on the DN, chances are I'll get sold junk.

I'm such a pussy. I wish I could die peacefully. I wish I was brave. I wish I had powerful impulses to die. I wonder how long I'm going to suffer like this for. I wonder how much shit I'm going to go through in life. I'm just one step away from being homeless. I depend completely on everyone around me.

I can't live, and I can't die. I'm stuck in a relationship which makes me miserable. Do I end it? What then? Will I be able to kill myself? Or will I have just eliminated another person from my life that I could rely on? How likely am I to kill myself? I bought the SN and AEs etc but what are the chances of me using it, and following through, and not calling for help? I'm fucking trapped. I hate it. I'm stuck between a whole load of shitty options. I wish I could just end it. Stop the cycle. Break the suffering. But I don't know if I can. Idk what to do. I wish I lived in Canada so I had a chance of getting MAID. But knowing my luck if be rejected anyway.

No-one cares. I'm so alone. No-one on this planet is either willing or able to help me die. I'm trapped in this soulless world

 

[HopefulSleep]

You could take benzos and then the sn when the effects started, makes the si lower and you would care less about the possible side effects.

Gas didn't work, tried many times.

Nitrogen?
What didn't work?

Partial didn't work, tried many times.

Didn't work for me either, I will try swb and if I can't get it to work I will use sn.

I wish I could get good heroin instead.

You can get from darknet markets but can be impure.
You can also get rc opioids as strong as fentanyl, even if it is cut it should be strong enough.

using needles really scares

What about boofing?

always been ripped off on the DN, chances are I'll get sold junk.

Oh your been laced stuff?
Even from vendors with good reviews?

 

[FuneralCry]

It must be really tiring feeling trapped in that situation, to me SN doesn't sound that horrible and I think that those who managed to access it despite all the restrictions and pro-life interference were fortunate, but that's just my view, I wish that suicide was easier for suffering people, we deserve the option to finally be free from everything in peace.

 

[SenseOfLoss]

… I am in exactly the same situation.

 

[aGoodDayToDie]

You could take benzos and then the sn when the effects started, makes the si lower and you would care less about the possible side effects.

Nitrogen?
What didn't work?

Didn't work for me either, I will try swb and if I can't get it to work I will use sn.

You can get from darknet markets but can be impure.
You can also get rc opioids as strong as fentanyl, even if it is cut it should be strong enough.

What about boofing?

Oh your been laced stuff?
Even from vendors with good reviews?

Argon. Always felt like I was suffocating. I experimented with it a lot and its as if the gas had CO2 in it but the 3 vendors of 3 bottles all said it didn't. So IDK what went wrong.

Can you book heroin? Yeah I'm worried purity will be v low. Whenever I tried ordering stuff on the DN, strength was low or non existent, even though reviews were good. My guess is people leave good reviews without trying the product, plus they're afraid of badmouthing a potentially nasty dealer who has their name and address.

 

[HopefulSleep]

Can you book heroin?

Book?

Yeah I'm worried purity will be v low. Whenever I tried ordering stuff on the DN, strength was low or non existent, even though reviews were good.

Sadly most drugs are illegal.

plus they're afraid of badmouthing a potentially nasty dealer who has their name and address.

What should a dealer do with the customer address he doesn't like?
He can't fill a police report with "this person bought drugs from me".

 

[aGoodDayToDie]

Book?

Sadly most drugs are illegal.

What should a dealer do with the customer address he doesn't like?
He can't fill a police report with "this person bought drugs from me".

Ah sorry what was meant to say boof heroin

If I dealer was suitably passed off he could pay a visit to your house and beat you up, knife you, destroy your property, all sorts of things?

 

[HopefulSleep]

Ah sorry what was meant to say boof heroin

Yea you can boof heroin

 

[Next]

If you like you could PM me

 

[Willthishelp?]

Does anyone have a good F or H connection?? In NL

You could take benzos and then the sn when the effects started, makes the si lower and you would care less about the possible side effects.

Nitrogen?
What didn't work?

Didn't work for me either, I will try swb and if I can't get it to work I will use sn.

You can get from darknet markets but can be impure.
You can also get rc opioids as strong as fentanyl, even if it is cut it should be strong enough.

What about boofing?

Oh your been laced stuff?
Even from vendors with good reviews?

Which is strong as fentanyl?

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm scared too. I wish we didn't have to do this to ourselves to escape. I do love my parents but I wish they'd thought the ENTIRE thing through- as in- my child WILL suffer and die of something one day. Even natural death isn't exactly nice! I do actually resent it that I'm going to have to hurt myself if I really want out. I expect we all do.