Venting Why the fuck does nothing ever get better?

[takeyourshotfunboy]

Growing up, they would always tell me that things get better. It´s not like I haven´t tried. Exercise, healthy eating, medication, dozens of different therapists from the age of 8 or 9. I have a family, friends, and a support network. I should be happy, right? Technically, I´m not alone, and yet I always feel like it. No matter what situation I am in, I always seem to be miserable. Even if I appear to be functioning from the outside, on the inside I always feel the same. Always broken, always dying, but never fully dead. Depression is a terminal illness and some day I will lose my battle.

 

[trynacbt]

Very relatable. People never know what's going on on the inside. But I've found in my case that keeping it hidden is my best chance of being successful at ctb.

 

[Notf1xable]

Because they still want to believe in hope, a lot of people just want to keep people around for their own comfort and aren't thinking of the pain they are in. Religion has a major factor in it too, too many reasons but not all valid reasons.

 

[Whatsthepointanyway]

How old are you? I'm 30. I still struggle. But it did get better

 

[MaybeSoon]

Personally for me, I was ripped away from my parents when I was 1 year old because they were (heroin and alcholics).. I was given back when I was 2 and took away at 3 because social services found me in a bath when they were both unconcious. My memories of that time were my dad beating the shit out of my mother and crying behind a christmas tree and massive trauma. I was in care until I was 8 when I was sprinkled with violence and sexual abuse until I was finally adopted at 8 years old when I was informed my birth mother had died (Wow what a catch I was for mt new parents) Beyond that was what I will say Is my fault.. everything since then I was in control of and I fucked it up royally.. hence why I'm here.

 

[Harleyyy]

Personally for me, I was ripped away from my parents when I was 1 year old because they were (heroin and alcholics).. I was given back when I was 2 and took away at 3 because social services found me in a bath when they were both unconcious. My memories of that time were my dad beating the shit out of my mother and crying behind a christmas tree and massive trauma. I was in care until I was 8 when I was sprinkled with violence and sexual abuse until I was finally adopted at 8 years old when I was informed my birth mother had died (Wow what a catch I was for mt new parents) Beyond that was what I will say Is my fault.. everything since then I was in control of and I fucked it up royally.. hence why I'm here.

I am sorry you feel this way. It is horrible what happened in your past. Childhood scars never really go away i guess.
I hope things get better for you and you find peace without having to end your life.