Story Why religion doesn't work for me and my experiences

[TAW122]

Before I begin, I want to say that I am not trying to knock on others for believing in God or religion and that I don't have anything against anyone who does as long as they don't impose it on me. Also, this will be a long story so please bear with me. Without further ado, here is my story.

During my childhood, I met an acquaintance in elementary school and during my first few years up until maybe 4th grade or so, I never went to church, but instead stayed home on Sunday mornings. After meeting said acquaintance, his family started to invite me to church as well as my family. As a young naive child, I was malleable and didn't really have much critical thinking skills to question things in deep thought or anything. I didn't feel comfortable, but instead I complied and went with the program. Most of the time, during Sunday school and service, I couldn't understand things as my reading comprehension was poor (this was also during the time before the Internet was organized and stuff -- late 90's maybe). I was gullible and followed what others taught despite rebelling oftenly. Eventually I submitted due to parents pressure as well as peer pressure. One day, after church service, the church went to lunch at a pizza place and there were arcades. I had some quarters and wanted to play a specific one, which was a shooting game where you shoot aliens from threatening Earth (Area 51: Site 4 iirc) and then the pastor (who was chaperone and in charge at the time) intervened, physically prevented me from playing the game (even though it was my own money/parents' money) and it really really shook me badly at the time. It took me years before I over came it.

During my teenage years, our family stopped going to church over time due to becoming busier with life and what not as well as a focus on academics and school. As I aged and started to understand things more and had more doubts, I viewed religion as an evil and eventually turned into an anti-theist during my early 20's and up until 25 or so. My teenage years sucked as my parents were the most abusive during that time since they wanted me to be socially successful, academically successful, and just about every demand they could push on me. The worst thing was after shit treatment, they try to play the ignorance and the Jesus card (in other words trying to whitewash and get me to get over it sweep it under the rug) This was also during the time where I started to consider ctb as a possible option, but extreme rage took over and that preoccupied me for a while. My parents' aren't religious nor did they believe in God, especially not my father (my mother did but she is more secular than ever and doesn't practice what she preaches - thus a hypocrite), but instead decide to pick and choose things and even kept mentioning 'the Bible (insert whatever moral value)' blah blah blah, and religion says blah etc. It only infuriated me further as it was dismissing my grievances as well as trying to justify and excuse their actions. Anyways I'm not gonna go too far off tangent.

Fast forward to college, I wasn't the best student but I was a decent enough student to be just slightly above average. During the time in college when I've developed critical thinking skills, I found religion and the Bible as well as God to just be absurd, logically there was not concrete evidence for me to believe. There was logical fallacies, contradictions, and inconsistencies in the Bible as well as the teachings of religious people. Then of course, there are apologists, ah those who go to great lengths to defend religion and cherry pick shit to make their claim valid (while violating countless rules of laws of logic). Furthermore, I didn't agree with it's teachings or the values (forgiving people for hurting you, love your enemies bullshit, etc.). Finally, of course, I never really benefit from following God or Christianity, but rather hindered me (I could go on but that'll make it too long) and just created more hassle for me.

For sometime in my mid twenties, I did a short experiment of living like a Christian, it was the worst trial experiment that I've done. Not only did I feel out of place, limited to what I could do, I felt this sort of disgusting feeling that I was fucked and weak. I quickly learned it wasn't for me and after a few months, I've decided, fuck it, back to atheism. I wouldn't be an anti-theist, but I am an atheist. So with that said there's my story and experiences with religion.

Short summary - Got burned by religion growing up and ended up disliking it, but even after thorough examination (during college and even post college, during grad school and post-grad school) of religion, I've arrived at the conclusion that there isn't a God. Now assuming there is one, I'd accept suffering the consequences of an shitty afterlife (hell, purgatory, etc.) knowing that I've exercised my free-will while on Earth and not simply submitting to a greater power just because.

 

[lv-gras]

respect your story and thoughts

 

[TAW122]

Thanks @lv-gras and if anyone has any questions or wants clarification on what transpired and what not, feel free to ask and I'll try to answer it as best as I can.

 

[Lra888]

I was raised Catholic and in my teenage years I totally rebelled against all religion.

Later I realized most of the things I hated about the religion were man-made like there's none of most of that shit in the Bible. I didn't hate the Bible, I hated judgemental controlling assholes.

The Bible is a collection of moral tales which some twist with their own corrupt interpretations. A person can just judge it as a historic piece of literature like the Odyssey or whatever. Even if a person doesn't take Jesus as the Messiah - that story is still powerful. A man who stood up to the corruption and greed of the society around him who refused to give in to the point of dying for what he believed was right. The ultimate "fuck you" to a corrupt society.

The book of revelations is a bizarre surreal read. Very cryptic and interesting.

Psalms are excellent to read for a depressed person as they are an excellent depiction of mental anguish and personal suffering.

I don't believe in any organized religion but I believe in something, call it god perhaps. My reason is that there is far too much organization in nature for it to be nonsense. Maybe "god" is a mathematical system set in motion. No one knows what consciousness is, where it comes from or where it goes.

I agree with you that it is not practical to live by the Bible because that would be masochism for the most part - allowing others to hurt you with no defending yourself.

 

[TAW122]

Good points @Lra888. As far as taking the Bible as another historic piece of literature, I think that is the best course of action for me since that means I acknowledge it's purpose during that particular time in history as well as it's collection of stories. Maybe if we lived in that time period a lot of things in the Bible might be applicable, but in modern society, it simply isn't for the most part.

 

[Threads]

I respect your story., and I commend you for the courage it took for you to share your experience.

I think one of the primary problems we have with Abrahamic religions is how the religions are interpreted. I am a believer in Jesus Christ, but I don't see or understand the gymnastics of how the peaceful message of Christ in the bible is taken to the context of denying people their rights and treating people as second class citizens.

If Christ were alive, he would be on this forum, listening and understanding. He might not necessarily support one's choice to die, but he wouldn't be asking his apostles to try to shut this place down or treat the members of this place like shit or crazy. Jesus hung out with prostitutes, the impoverished, the meek, the decent, the hungry. He challenged the elite, he demanded that they pay their share and not trade in the sacred temple.

What we see in America is a bastardization of religion, and what have seen throughout history is the weaponization of religion as a tool to justify genocide, slavery, and cultural destruction. This was not the message sent out in the gospels. I'm extremely anti-clerical, I firmly believe in the separation of church and state, religion has no place in politics. Religious belief's shouldn't be imposed on others.

Christ fed the poor.
The republicans created the war on poverty.

Ask yourself. How can you reconcile feeding the poor and declaring war on them? Even if the 'War on poverty' was meant to end it, it just created more. The 'War on' attitude has been a favorite attitude for a party whose primarily voter base claim to be 'Christian.;

 

[TAW122]

I respect your story., and I commend you for the courage it took for you to share your experience.

I think one of the primary problems we have with Abrahamic religions is how the religions are interpreted. I am a believer in Jesus Christ, but I don't see or understand the gymnastics of how the peaceful message of Christ in the bible is taken to the context of denying people their rights and treating people as second class citizens.

If Christ were alive, he would be on this forum, listening and understanding. He might not necessarily support one's choice to die, but he wouldn't be asking his apostles to try to shut this place down or treat the members of this place like shit or crazy. Jesus hung out with prostitutes, the impoverished, the meek, the decent, the hungry. He challenged the elite, he demanded that they pay their share and not trade in the sacred temple.

What we see in America is a bastardization of religion, and what have seen throughout history is the weaponization of religion as a tool to justify genocide, slavery, and cultural destruction. This was not the message sent out in the gospels. I'm extremely anti-clerical, I firmly believe in the separation of church and state, religion has no place in politics. Religious belief's shouldn't be imposed on others.

Christ fed the poor.
The republicans created the war on poverty.

Ask yourself. How can you reconcile feeding the poor and declaring war on them? Even if the 'War on poverty' was meant to end it, it just created more. The 'War on' attitude has been a favorite attitude for a party whose primarily voter base claim to be 'Christian.;

Good points, I think what you said about Christ would most likely ring true in today's society. He wouldn't necessarily try to censor and shutdown this place or treat us like criminals, crazies, or garbage. Based on some of the lessons I had when I was in Sunday school, it rang true that Jesus often challenged authorities and what not.

Regarding America and the bastardization of religion, yes I think that much is true, even throughout history. Humans used it to justify control over the masses and to keep them in check so that the elite can benefit. What I hope to see in America (though it won't likely happen) is the separation of church and state, but so far that doesn't seem to happen. And yes, religious beliefs should only matter to the individual, not imposed onto others nor influencing law and politics.

If perhaps what you said about the party's voter base to be Christian, then (by your definition) that means they aren't really 'Christians' in the sense that Jesus is?

 

[Threads]

perhaps what you said about the party's voter base to be Christian, then (by your definition) that means they aren't really 'Christians' in the sense that Jesus is?

The party that claims to have the religious and moral high ground is the party that elected Donald Trump.

Donald Trump is the antithesis of Christ.

 

[worldexploder]

I only read the red parts. I a, severely dyslexic and can only focus on bits at a time. Also I'm drunk which makes it harder.

I grew up with my biomom Catholic, my dad not giving a shit, and my aunt and uncle being Mormon. I talked my aunt and uncle out of Mormonism in the mid 2000s. I always hated church. It seemed like a punishment to me. The way I was raised everything was a punishment. The one thing I loved about my aunt and uncle is that they never pushed religion on me.

This is embarrassing to me but just before I was 18 I joined the Mormon church. It was out of desperation. I was miserable and searching for an identity.

I had all these hot missionaries talking to me. I remember the day I got baptized....I felt empty. Everyone promised me that I'd be happy. I wasn't. I attended church for 6 months trying to feel good. Never worked. Everything seemed boring and pointless. Then I quit. And I was hassled by members of the church but that only pissed me off.

Then I started to read up on the real story of Joseph Smith and he was basically a psychopathic terrorists. Then I started to read up on other religions. I came to the conclusion in my early 20s that religion and an afterlife is full of shit.

I then became an atheist. Then an antitheist around age 25....meaning that I am against theism. I'm sort of a militant atheist now. Haven't changed my views in 10 years. I talked my aunt and uncle into leaving the Mormon church and convinced my ex wife that there is no god.

 

[TAW122]

Well done on de-converting your aunt, uncle, and ex-wife! I have never succeeded in de-converting or convincing others' of the non-existence of God.

 

[Zaynaldeen]

As a Muslim, I honestly respect your story. I know most people here are atheists, I honestly understand why and I guess I'm emotionally struggling with faith myself, though rationally I still believe the religion is true. Islam is one of the few things in life that keep me from jumping from a bridge or stomething. People have stolen from me and harmed me so much, I keep thinking about being a criminal myself for that reason, though being religious I feel like I cannot do it. For me at least, religion keeps people away from evil, at least the religion that is Islam.

I kept thinking about why Allah SWT would allow suffering in this world, but it's honestly pretty simple, this life is a test for mankind. Whether you are rich or poor, there is always a challenge in your way. If you're wealthy then you should give your wealth to the ones in need of help. If you're poor then you'll face the trials and tribulations of survival. Besides, it is mentioned in the Qur'an that with every hardship comes ease. So if you don't face any ease in this life, you'll probably face it in the next (depending on whether you are Muslim or not). I tried to look at the arguments from atheists and Christians against Islam for months, but I honestly cannot be convinced even when I look at the so-called best arguments.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

I always find it funny how religion is supposed to be so grand and all-encompassing, yet God is supposedly a "jealous" God. And a man of the cloth coming between a kid and his space invaders, come on now. That's some petty shit. If there is anything up there, I doubt it's that hung up on stuff that really doesn't matter.

 

[Dor]

If there is a god why the hell would he punish anyone? Didn't that bastard technically create you? Only to punish you? What a pointless fucking endeavor.