Why is lonliness driving me to suicide

[june]

Weeks will go by without a single notification to my phone. I've lost my health, my home, my career, my relationships, my family only this year. It's been about 3 years of me fightng ungodly hard to steer this ship.

It started 3 years ago with a partner leaving me the same day I was in a life changing car accident.

And concluded last month with my most recent partner leaving me while I was struggling with the after effects of a seizure.

Being alone and traumatized at the amount I've lost...
I'm trying to take it day by day but walking this alone, no friends and no support

 

[Circles]

It fucking sucks but it's part of the human condition . I keep questioning why we even have to feel this emotion every day relentlessly especially since all we have is ourselves most of the time and it's completely fucked up how we can't even control it not even a little bit . It pervades everything we do and no matter how good things may go it'll come creeping back in randomly at any moment to remind us of its existence. Feeling lonely even being around people just makes it worse, like there's no winning move. It just makes an already lonely life feel even lonelier like no matter how hard we accept it, it will never leave.

 

[C_F]

It fucking sucks but it's part of the human condition . I keep questioning why we even have to feel this emotion every day relentlessly especially since all we have is ourselves most of the time and it's completely fucked up how we can't even control it not even a little bit . It pervades everything we do and no matter how good things may go it'll come creeping back in randomly at any moment to remind us of its existence. Feeling lonely even being around people just makes it worse, like there's no winning move. It just makes an already lonely life feel even lonelier like no matter how hard we accept it, it will never leave.

On Youtube, there is a Vox video titled, "Why Are We So Lonely? - Glad You Asked"

It takes a little dive into why we may be hardwired to feel this emotion. Have a watch!

 

[GoBack]

Were not made to be alone, we come from tribes that look after each other, before that we came from apes that still live in tribes and look after each other. We need contact it's biological and psychological

 

[FriendofDeath]

Weeks will go by without a single notification to my phone. I've lost my health, my home, my career, my relationships, my family only this year. It's been about 3 years of me fightng ungodly hard to steer this ship.

It started 3 years ago with a partner leaving me the same day I was in a life changing car accident.

And concluded last month with my most recent partner leaving me while I was struggling with the after effects of a seizure.

Being alone and traumatized at the amount I've lost...
I'm trying to take it day by day but walking this alone, no friends and no support

Your losses are overwhelming. You know that list of stressors used as a tool for ascertaining your level of depression? You would check most of those boxes. I am sorry you have been treated badly by those you have cared about in your time of need. When my pain was at it's worst I would stop and wait, thinking surely my next breath wouldn't hurt as badly as the one I just took. I have self isolated and have a routine which gives me the strength to survive, but I'm not really living.

It's good you have found yourself in a safe environment here. You have to be a strong person after getting through these past 3 years especially. It sounds like you could use someone to help process all of this. Then you can make a decision. Agreed, loneliness is a very tough place to be, especially now.

 

[mathieu]

I, too, am so very alone and I don't know why. Supposedly my family love me but I'm still all alone in my little house that feels more like a prison cell.

 

[FriendofDeath]

I, too, am so very alone and I don't know why. Supposedly my family love me but I'm still all alone in my little house that feels more like a prison cell.

I can relate, but being an introvert, it doesn't usually bother me. I'm sorry you're in this situation, too. I'll hear, "They're so busy." I say if it's something you want to do, you can find the time. So many are self absorbed or figure they can get around to it tomorrow or at least in the near future. I hope you're out on parole soon. My furry critters help me plenty when things are toughest.

 

[mathieu]

I can relate, but being an introvert, it doesn't usually bother me. I'm sorry you're in this situation, too. I'll hear, "They're so busy." I say if it's something you want to do, you can find the time. So many are self absorbed or figure they can get around to it tomorrow or at least in the near future. I hope you're out on parole soon. My furry critters help me plenty when things are toughest.

Yeah, I don't know what I'd do without my dog. That would be loneliness on a whole nother level.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

Same here, lack of social interaction kills me

 

[4eyebiped]

While I have friends and family, the only thing I seek is that one person to hold tight, talk with, laugh with, explore with, grow with and love with. I never had a need for anything else but that one elusive person. Loneliness is a pain like no other.

 

[Myforevercharlie]

I unfortunately can relate. There are some left, but we lead very different lives.. I can't blame them.
Until today I always held on... But after again being shoved aside by my mom for a guy while I'm screaming for help..

I still can't see myself ending my life, but its getting harder and harder to see the sun shine

 

[Bct]

Sorry, that must be really hard for you to lose a lot. Loneliness is a factor that makes me want to CTB too. Wish I could just content with being alone.