Discussion Who else has made peace with their death?

[lwlaiet8887]

I feel like I've finally made peace with my CTB in the near future. I realize how deterministic life and that my circumstances are out of my control. It also helps that I've spent many years living and suffering in futility although I can't deny that I had some good moments, although they were mostly amplified by my delusion and unawareness of how unfair life is. It's not about how hard you work or your soul (for many things) but sheer luck despite what we're commonly told, "Work enough and you can have whatever you want in life" hah, what a funny joke. At the moment I'm just enjoying music, warm drinks, will maybe play games a few more times bagging up my stuff. The only thing bothering me is failing my CBT as there's a possibility of failure although small. Overall I feel at peace.

 

[ipmanwc0]

I'm looking forward to leaving

 

[Lys_C15H25N3O_d3]

desperate of not meeting my "deadline" in 12 hours (doesn't sound funny now)
BUT i've tried
"if going in peace" is not an option for me, who have never thought so seriously about that . so be it, no point daydreaming about a "peaceful farewell" if a "regular life" had been denied to me. regrets? sure tons of them. Its not going to help keep wondering "if are there going to be more"
How much can it hurt more? without the "proper humane means"? id be at peace i think, if had everything ready and not having to resort to.. disturbingly low success % and high % chances of permanent damage. any who believe in all my stupid story would think "im lucky" for all the unbeliavable close-calls. But seriously? there's people who deserve "this luck" far more than me . not a child anymore neither teenager , and failed adult? awwn... gimme a (neck)break

 

[d3j3ct3dl0s3r05]

I don't want to leave but that's just SI talking. I keep breaking down at the thought of everything ending so abruptly and tragically but I also know it is my fate and what I must do.

 

[dggtscccvfd]

I'm at peace with my decision to CTB: I've have a good life that has been cruelly interrupted by a physical health problem that I can't bear. When I take the SN, I'll think of the good times and remember it was all worth it!

 

[PracheenKaal_00!]

I've already made peace with death. Just hoping that SI doesn't ruin my CTB plan.