• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block.

When you're visibly suffering in the company of other people, and they...

  • don't ask you about how you're doing

    Votes: 3 14.3%
  • ask how you're doing, and you respond truthfully; they let the conversation die

    Votes: 6 28.6%
  • ask how you're doing, and you respond truthfully; they just make prescriptive comments

    Votes: 12 57.1%

  • Total voters
    21
R. A.

R. A.

Some day the dream will end
Aug 8, 2022
1,748
This is a tough one for me! If someone's gonna try and dig into my wounded existence I want them to show a little compassion and attempt at understanding for fuck's sake, so I'd say while the first option can be very tough, it'd be down to 2 or 3. I think I need to take some time and think on my answer to my own poll.

Edit to clarify: I don't just mean they're asking in a habitual "how are you?" kind of way; they either know or get the sense that something isn't right. And when you answer, you aren't unloading every single thing onto them, but you are acknowledging that you are not good.
 
Last edited:
A

akirat9

エクトリアン
Sep 23, 2022
386
all of them. don't talk just let me die while i am in the middle of it
 
  • Like
Reactions: BornToFail
foreverfalling

foreverfalling

Experienced
Jul 22, 2022
276
I'd rather they don't ask to save us both time and effort. If they let the conversation die then I can at least give them the benefit of the doubt that they are possibly sensitive and just don't know what to say. Otherwise if they give me cliches it just shows that they 100% don't give a shit, and just invalidated everything I said, so I'd say that would piss me off the worst.
 
  • Like
Reactions: makethepainstop and TAW122
TAW122

TAW122

Emissary of the right to die.
Aug 30, 2018
7,294
The last choice pisses me off the most because not only is it dismissive of my plight(s), but also presumptuous, implying that they know what's best for me (which they do not).
 
  • Like
Reactions: JAlexa and makethepainstop
Fadeawaaaay

Fadeawaaaay

Visionary
Nov 12, 2021
2,158
When people ask how I'm doing I say fine…
 
  • Like
Reactions: makethepainstop
S

SamTam33

Warlock
Oct 9, 2022
763
I chose the second one. It makes me feel lonely. Like they heard me but didn't acknowledge what I said.

When they share flimsy comebacks and suggestions, I chalk it up to their "programming." It gets better. Hang in there.

Blah blah blah. Sure.
 
S

Someone123

Illuminated
Oct 19, 2021
3,874
Truthfully, none of them upset me because communication is hard, and language is imprecise. The way "how are you" is used in our culture is strange, and I don't blame any one individual for this. If a cashier asks this then typically people say good how are you and they say good, it's just a way of saying hi on our society when it is someone who you don't know. If it is someone you know well you may get more in depth, depending on what your relationship with them is- have you had in depth conversations with them before? For people you know some it is somewhere in between. It is an odd expression that can be awkward, but I don't get mad at anybody about this weird quirk of how this expression is used- I just keep in mind that the depth of the response depends on the depth of your relationship with this person.
 
Last edited:

Similar threads

NormallyNeurotic
Replies
19
Views
668
Offtopic
NormallyNeurotic
NormallyNeurotic
F
Replies
15
Views
1K
Suicide Discussion
Forveleth
F
Myheart4U
Replies
1
Views
178
Suicide Discussion
Praestat_Mori
P