I think its just a case where the universe likes to fuck with people, not giving them what they want. I knew a guy who had graduated with his dream job ( video game design), gotten married to his high school sweetheart and they'd bought a house together and just started living togther, only to die of inoperable cancer just 8 months afterwards. It made me so angry and sad. Back then, I was in good health so i wasnt suicidal. His death made me so sad and I got thinking about this stuff.