Venting When people say, “No, it wouldn’t be better if you weren’t here.”

[dropdeadfred]

As much as I respect you having your own opinions, it doesn't detract from the fact that I have my own reasons as to why it would be better... at least three solid ones.
All I do is mess things up due to extreme fatigue &/ depression (years of proof) & cause things to be awkward in relationships because I no longer have the flame to live such as you. What about those that live in intense physical pain everyday? Would you feel the same about them?
If you want your opinions to be respected, respect those who know their lives better than you do.
Thanks.

 

[Ghost2211]

It really wouldn't be better for others if I wasn't here, and I am here out of respect for that but nobody considers how that affects me.

 

[woxihuanni]

It really wouldn't be better for others if I wasn't here, and I am here out of respect for that but nobody considers how that affects me.

Except to make you suffer more if you dare feel bad.

 

[OminousVaL]

Maybe not better for others but this choice is for me and I have the right to make it.

 

[StringPuppet]

I could objectively prove why it would be better if anyone said this to me

 

[ecmnesia]

Maybe not better for others but this choice is for me and I have the right to make it.

there, you nailed it.


i fucking hate how people tend to believe we are incapable of making our own choices.

 

[darksideofthebright]

Even worse, as soon as people find out that one is suicidal, they will, without a doubt, use words like "irrational", "rash", "illogical", "crazy", "shallow", "stupid", and the list goes on.. If you respect, why so quickly jump to conclusion and hurt people even more with your comments?

 

[Symbiote]

People who say it that way want you to stay so they have someone to look at when they feel down and tell themselves, "At least I'm not that guy". My wife tells me she's been trying to "help", by tearing me down every chance she gets. I need to be less happy for her to be happier. Tells me that my depression has made me useless, and I told her last night that I want out then. No sense in staying if I'm useless and worthless to her. But no, she can't let me go. I don't know what she sees in me, but she's afraid of being abandoned, yet still feels like pushing me away. I'm torn apart by all of this and this is just half of my pain.

 

[darksideofthebright]

People who say it that way want you to stay so they have someone to look at when they feel down and tell themselves, "At least I'm not that guy". My wife tells me she's been trying to "help", by tearing me down every chance she gets. I need to be less happy for her to be happier. Tells me that my depression has made me useless, and I told her last night that I want out then. No sense in staying if I'm useless and worthless to her. But no, she can't let me go. I don't know what she sees in me, but she's afraid of being abandoned, yet still feels like pushing me away. I'm torn apart by all of this and this is just half of my pain.

That's just utterly terrible. I am so sorry you have to deal with this kind of mental abuse.

 

[Ardesevent]

People saying that like they know everything about your life really make me angry. It might not be better for them, but it'll definitely be better for me.

 

[Symbiote]

I tried to call 911 last night when she started hitting me...the operator laughed and said to suck it up like a man. I don't want to physically hurt her and plus no one is not going to believe I got roughed up by a 5 foot tall woman. The events that have unfolded this week have hastened my will to CTB. The systems have failed, the law is against me, and society doesn't care.

 

[Dead beat dad]

People who say it that way want you to stay so they have someone to look at when they feel down and tell themselves, "At least I'm not that guy". My wife tells me she's been trying to "help", by tearing me down every chance she gets. I need to be less happy for her to be happier. Tells me that my depression has made me useless, and I told her last night that I want out then. No sense in staying if I'm useless and worthless to her. But no, she can't let me go. I don't know what she sees in me, but she's afraid of being abandoned, yet still feels like pushing me away. I'm torn apart by all of this and this is just half of my pain.

Brother this sounds horrendous, I'm so sorry that you have this conundrum in you life. I wish there could be something to assuage this scenario and that I might say or do something that can help.
For what it's worth I feel you and this scenario brother; I only function as some sort of empty automaton, I could be replaced in a heartbeat and it wouldn't matter none, its not me they want, it's what I do.
Love and respect my brother

DBD

 

[ecmnesia]

People who say it that way want you to stay so they have someone to look at when they feel down and tell themselves, "At least I'm not that guy". My wife tells me she's been trying to "help", by tearing me down every chance she gets. I need to be less happy for her to be happier. Tells me that my depression has made me useless, and I told her last night that I want out then. No sense in staying if I'm useless and worthless to her. But no, she can't let me go. I don't know what she sees in me, but she's afraid of being abandoned, yet still feels like pushing me away. I'm torn apart by all of this and this is just half of my pain.

this is horrible. i am sorry if I offend you but your wife sucks, it is as having a parasite sucking your last bit of energy. you don't deserve this kind of treatment and burden. i hope things get better for you.

I tried to call 911 last night when she started hitting me...the operator laughed and said to suck it up like a man. I don't want to physically hurt her and plus no one is not going to believe I got roughed up by a 5 foot tall woman. The events that have unfolded this week have hastened my will to CTB. The systems have failed, the law is against me, and society doesn't care.

that's heavy to digest. i can't imagine how you are feeling.

isn't there any safe place you can go? someone who would actually stay by your side and give you support?

 

[Symbiote]

Brother this sounds horrendous, I'm so sorry that you have this conundrum in you life. I wish there could be something to assuage this scenario and that I might say or do something that can help.
For what it's worth I feel you and this scenario brother; I only function as some sort of empty automaton, I could be replaced in a heartbeat and it wouldn't matter none, its not me they want, it's what I do.
Love and respect my brother

DBD

The only way out is death. I don't have it in my head emotionally to go through divorce because I know she'll make that a living hell as well. My heart is acting up because of all the stress this year.

 

[Ghost2211]

The only way out is death. I don't have it in my head emotionally to go through divorce because I know she'll make that a living hell as well. My heart is acting up because of all the stress this year.

I very much understand this. When I finally left things got significantly worse. Abusers punish us for leaving.

 

[darksideofthebright]

The only way out is death. I don't have it in my head emotionally to go through divorce because I know she'll make that a living hell as well. My heart is acting up because of all the stress this year.

Oh man, that just sucks. I can't completely relate with you but I totally hear you though. I really wish you nothing but the best.

 

[Symbiote]

this is horrible. i am sorry if I offend you but your wife sucks, it is as having a parasite sucking your last bit of energy. you don't deserve this kind of treatment and burden. i hope things get better for you.


that's heavy to digest. i can't imagine how you are feeling.

isn't there any safe place you can go? someone who would actually stay by your side and give you support?

I'm taking my bike and going a few states over to ride the forest and trails, to feel some sort of happiness one more time for myself. I want that to be the last image in my head before I CTB. I don't want to CTB with my wife screaming at me. I told myself that I won't involve anyone in my troubles should they catch feelings after I die.

 

[k75]

I don't think any of my people will be better off without me. In fact, I see little things that they need me for all the time, and it makes me sad. But that doesn't change how I feel or what I have to live with. It's an impossible feeling situation.

One thing I think about a lot is I have all this knowledge that's unique to me, and it's going to die with me. It's not something that would hold me back, but I wish I could just preserve it somehow.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

How can they say for certain if it would not be better if another individual was not still living? This planet has many people on it each with their own lives, and not every single person has loved ones or a group that they are part of. If someone has no close connections or network then their death will likely not make an impact either way.