S
Susan Caswell
Specialist
- Feb 25, 2019
- 316
Im terrified whats the best easiest 100% successful way to end this I have to sort this out nw just kept hoping the deafening tinnitus and hyperacusis would stop and id get well and on with my life. Its now more than a person can stand ive never heard a noise this loud ever but in both ears and all normal sounds are creshendo deafening its horrific I was well happy calm have everything I could want cant believe its even happened to me or why from nowhere the anxiety of 3 years like this taken terrible toll I feel so ill look even worse. I still can only think jump I don't have enough meds, tried to suffocate myself, not strong enough to hang myself, cant get to Switzerland, how can this even happen I could have taken any condition but this anything no one can live with deafening noise both ears 24/7 its torture worse than torture ive run out of all medical options no cause coming up all I know is my ears and hearing were perfect an I was super fit health busy but so well happy and calm don't deserve this when I think just not come all was good more than good if only it would stop or just go down to how it was when it started one ear one noise I coped I had no amplifying no pressure or pain in my ears didn't hear it all day but dear God now its more than I cant take and I can stand a lot never thought I would have to end my life I thought I had years of happy ahead of me doing all I planned such hopes and dreams so much to still do I was sensible sane independent nothing I couldn't do or face I think the noise for 3 years now is driving me insane I cant stand to be insane I was the most logical person always happy I was never moody or down always helping everyone else tinnitus isn't like this hissing for years never bothered me once I thought it was atmospheric singing but this is deafening jet plane roaring with hammering and drilling but I cant stand any sound mot kettle or tap running my own voice makes my ears vibrate I so sick of it all but its the no quiet no peace ever never stops never down I dont even know what set it off I wish I did and wish I could at least get it down to a level I cant stand and live with but everyday its just going up and up and don't know why tinnitus doesn't destroy a person can anyone help me ive got to et it down or end this I never knew taking your own life was so hard but never had cause to I valued life my life and everyone elses worked so hard all my life thought my retirement wold be great time I was so well loved life my life im sorry going on but very frightend very tired feel very ill never knew anxiety cold make you this ill