Hey,
I never said this before because people could judge me wrongly, but I recently saw some of your posts and I feel in a very similar way.
Normally I don't like torture, but when I'm angry everything changes. I have murder thoughts daily and there is no day when I don't think in all the atrocities they do and I don't feel a deep wish of causing damage to someone.
This gets progresively worse. I reached the level of bloodlust when I only want to cause them as pain as they caused (a lot). In rare ocasions, I want to rip them (something rare as the idea normally horrorifies me) and cover me in the blood of my victims.
I never will do it, I have a lot of self-control but I don't know if all this srress and fury will be discharged in such way. I hope no, I don't want to go to prison.
I only want this feelings out of my head, they are harmful for me.