Discussion What would change your mind?

[Onomotopoeia]

Hi,

I am new here and just testing the waters. Thought a discussion would be nice. I'm 36 and no longer have the sharp edges of pain that came with adolescence. Actually, I do not really have a reason to be suicidal and yet always have been. Still, nothing has ever changed my mind and I really could not think of something that would.

For the purpose of attempting to answer the closest thing I could come up with would be a journey to the end that would wake me up. I long ago decided if/when I decide it's time to go I would have an exit fun run. Take whatever cash I had and blow it. Maybe go to some touristy beach spot find a friend and just waste whatever money I had on some drugs and whatever other fun things might be around.

If I could go an such an adventure and it could somehow reignite a spark i'm not sure exists now. Well, it's possible that would change my mind. Unlikely, but possible

I'm not arrogant enough to think i'm unusual in being suicidal without a reason. However I am especially curious if you are like me and do not really have a reason what might change your mind?

All are welcome to answer i'd love to here your ideas!

 

[Batstern]

I think the only thing that may sway me, would be if I won the lottery and was able to move to Norway. Just spending my days peacefully enjoying nature, music, and being creative.

I know that if I don't ctb I definitely could work hard at Uni, get a good job and end up in that position in the future. But if I do pass soon, I won't miss out on anything, because once I'm dead it's literally impossible for me to regret my decision, if you know what I mean?

I'm pretty apathetic towards life. So if something big changes that puts me in a really good position I might reconsider, but otherwise, I'm equally as happy to leave.

 

[Pulpit2018]

I think the only thing that may sway me, would be if I won the lottery and was able to move to Norway. Just spending my days peacefully enjoying nature, music, and being creative.

You need to win the lottery twice if you want to live in Norway!

 

[Batstern]

You need to win the lottery twice if you want to live in Norway!

Lmao, very true!

Maybe win the lottery, then get a minimal job to subsidise myself haha.

 

[JWL]

You need to win the lottery twice if you want to live in Norway!

Ha ha, at least 100 million euros..

 

[Exile]

A genuinely loving relationship (with a man, not just my cat ). But I'm not capable of trusting a romantic partner enough to make that work.

 

[Moldova_3k]

I think the only thing that may sway me, would be if I won the lottery and was able to move to Norway. Just spending my days peacefully enjoying nature, music, and being creative.

That is how I feel at times!

 

[essbet]

If I could enjoy being with people. If I could keep a job without having a breakdown after a year. If I could go back in time to my 20s and make other choices.

 

[Nitromask]

A whole lotta money would change my mind. Like, where I didn't have to work and could just do whatever I wanted.

 

[Jake.123]

I would need to go back in time and change some stuff. Which is impossible so basically nothing

 

[DepressionsAHo]

Hi,

I am new here and just testing the waters. Thought a discussion would be nice. I'm 36 and no longer have the sharp edges of pain that came with adolescence. Actually, I do not really have a reason to be suicidal and yet always have been. Still, nothing has ever changed my mind and I really could not think of something that would.

For the purpose of attempting to answer the closest thing I could come up with would be a journey to the end that would wake me up. I long ago decided if/when I decide it's time to go I would have an exit fun run. Take whatever cash I had and blow it. Maybe go to some touristy beach spot find a friend and just waste whatever money I had on some drugs and whatever other fun things might be around.

If I could go an such an adventure and it could somehow reignite a spark i'm not sure exists now. Well, it's possible that would change my mind. Unlikely, but possible

I'm not arrogant enough to think i'm unusual in being suicidal without a reason. However I am especially curious if you are like me and do not really have a reason what might change your mind?

All are welcome to answer i'd love to here your ideas!

Being competent enough to keep a job. I wanted to work for the FBI, homicide detective or human rights lawyer, but none of those things are possible for me. How am I supposed to have the whole world weighing on me but can't even keep or do basic tasks a third grader could do?
The depression I could maybe get through, but being me, I can't

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I was going to post, "a totally new... body with erased memories of my life other than functional facts (how to tie shoe laces, how to boil water...) together with a different brain/mind much better adapted to the realities of life." But then I think of the suffering of so many other beings ripped apart as part of nature and I realize nothing could change my life. Life is a truly savage garden I want no part of.

 

[Mort]

If i had an incurable disease that would be quick save time money getting goods together and all so they would not know i was going to kill my self so would be win win for me :)

 

[AhG]

I would change my mind if my wife were to come back, but till then I'm planning my bus route.

 

[Livinginhell]

Nothing! I hate living.

 

[SirChuxAlot]

Honestly, if I found a decent job I can turn into a career, I would probaly reconsider... for awhile. The only other thing is if I ended up having a child but slim chance on that one.

 

[justabouttobedone]

If I regain my memory skills and ability to think and solve (which i lost them over time by stupidly gaming for years and recently by a suicide attempt), I would restart my life and enter a college again.

 

[pleasethistime]

i dont have the will, ego health and energy for a career, relationships etc.
i feel that even though i starve i wont be able to show any struggle for life.
now i live or exist because i can economicially.

 

[Buddyluv19]

There is nothing that could realistically occur to change my mind. I wish I would have ended it 12 years ago when I may have had better access to methods and wasn't terminally ill.

I hope you find a way out of the conundrum - whatever your decision. Peace.

 

[Redt2go]

Not have brain damage and go back in time

Damn wouldn't we all love to go back in time

 

[housecat]

If human nature were different, and the world wasn't filled with greed, corruption, abuse, rape, starvation, inequality, habitat loss, pollution, etc etc. And just for people in society to be less obnoxious in general. It would also help to have wealth, so I could move back to europe and afford a house. I would like my marriage to get better or end on good terms. And I'd like to be less lazy and miserable. Changing all of that would almost certainly stop me.

 

[Please_stop]

If I could go back in time

 

[asdasan]

I would need to go back in time and change some stuff. Which is impossible so basically nothing

Exactly this.

 

[JWL]

If human nature were different, and the world wasn't filled with greed, corruption, abuse, rape, starvation, inequality, habitat loss, pollution, etc etc.

But maybe that's how it's meant to be. And it's always been like this. So maybe at least one of the reasons we come here is to learn how to work with and overcome these negatives and move ourselves and the world forward.

 

[throwaway777]

nothing tbh ... my mind will never accept this world and itself

 

[I am ___________]

Sad to say this, but nothing would. This world gets more worse each and everyday, and the sole reason behind that is humanity itself. Humanity never learns, and throughout history has always committed the same mistakes. Idiotic wars, low wages with horrible conditions, higher cost of living, no real meaning nor purpose. I cannot imagine a future with me in it, especially not in this world that is. You could give me all the money in the world and I would refuse it, nothing in life is worth living for, and nothing can change the past experiences that have shaped my view. And besides the fact that it seems this world really does want to take me out, I can't even leave my house without almost ending up getting killed or caught up into trouble. That is why I will take my own life with my own hands.
You know when you've had enough, there is no point in trying to prolong it or cling to a false sense of hope when there isn't any.

 

[ayanonikki]

well, i'm actually going to japan this summer for a month after winning a scholarship. i will stay with a host family and experience a japanese high school. i know it's not a long time, but i've been really hoping that somehow this experience would make me see something in myself or in the world that would make it worth living, experience something new and like yourself i want to reignite a spark in me. i've lost all my friends in school and i only really speak to my family, so i hope i will meet at least one person over there who can give me a refreshing perspective on life. maybe my hopes are too high, but i really am hoping i experience something that will make me say, "well, maybe it's not so bad."

 

[housecat]

But maybe that's how it's meant to be. And it's always been like this. So maybe at least one of the reasons we come here is to learn how to work with and overcome these negatives and move ourselves and the world forward.

Then I would like to remove the crushing responsibility that I have to change the world, because it's too overwhelming and difficult. The small positive differences that we make are essentially insignificant and do not alter human nature. I made a deliberate decision not to care too much for my own sanity.

 

[Dead beat dad]

Hi,

I am new here and just testing the waters. Thought a discussion would be nice. I'm 36 and no longer have the sharp edges of pain that came with adolescence. Actually, I do not really have a reason to be suicidal and yet always have been. Still, nothing has ever changed my mind and I really could not think of something that would.

For the purpose of attempting to answer the closest thing I could come up with would be a journey to the end that would wake me up. I long ago decided if/when I decide it's time to go I would have an exit fun run. Take whatever cash I had and blow it. Maybe go to some touristy beach spot find a friend and just waste whatever money I had on some drugs and whatever other fun things might be around.

If I could go an such an adventure and it could somehow reignite a spark i'm not sure exists now. Well, it's possible that would change my mind. Unlikely, but possible

I'm not arrogant enough to think i'm unusual in being suicidal without a reason. However I am especially curious if you are like me and do not really have a reason what might change your mind?

All are welcome to answer i'd love to here your ideas!

Sadly nothing. I'd like to make peace with the world, forgive those who've harmed me and make good the harm I've caused, but then I can CTB with a clear conscience, as opposed to now when I am eaten up by hate, anger and despair.
I'm sorry, there is nothing.
DBD

 

[Xaphous]

Experiencing love for the first time would be nice and might change my wish to die. A social life would be amazing too but I would have got that many years ago if it was so easy trying that without friends already. I had many chances with finding love but I just ran away like a douche as always. So many missed opportunities and zero experience as a result. I'm so dumb and lack common sense for that but social anxiety and endless negative experiences, memory references.. it knows how to paralyse and stop you making potentially positive changes, in case it's another bad experience which could break you further.