Discussion What were/are your parents like?

[LuzurPhagget]

It's New Years Eve and I'm lonely as fuck lol. I had plans to see a concert downtown with some people from work, but they're lame as fuck and kinda hermits. So fuck 'em. Didn't REALLY wanna go THAT badly, but it's a legit rock band and I actually own a couple of their CDs. But I wouldn't really want to go alone. So fuck it. Here I am.

Anyway, what are your parents like. There's GOTTA be a correlation between being depressed/suicidal and shitty parents lol. I think I actually HATE my parents. Especially my father. But ESPECIALLY my mother. Krazy kunt. I'm no professional to give such a diagnosis, but I think she's a narcissist. It's funny, I sort of came to this same conclusion about 5 years ago and even remember reading a book about it...and then I just kinda buried it up until now. Maybe I knew there was nothing I could do at the time and it was pointless to attempt anything...similar to how I'm feeling right now lol. Fuck, what a headcase she is. Honestly, it wouldn't be so bad if they were just shitty, fuckup parents, but they fucking PRY themselves into my life. NO respect for my boundaries or my privacy (durr, what are boundaries??? Why do you need them? We are your parents). Dumb bitches. AND THEN, after invading my privacy and inevitably finding "dirt" on me, they feel ashamed of me and hold it against me. Fuckers.

The guilt-tripping is strong with my mother. She is unbelievable. I think on some subconscious level, she realizes she's a shitty parent/person and so buys/does a poorly thought out/ half-assed gesture as an appeasement...only to guilt trip me later down the road about how much she does for us and how we're never grateful for it. Idiot.

Everything is ALWAYS about her. She is just so self-absorbed. Almost INCAPABLE of thinking beyond herself. Everything ALWAYS comes back to her. Everything we do is just an extension of her and a portrayal of her image SO, we must always strive to be doing the best we can to make HER look good. Just so she can have something positive to talk about with her "friends" on the phone (other pathetic old has-been hags with nothing better to do with their time). She doesn't give a fuck if we're actually happy. As long as the retard has something to "brag" about with her other pathetic loser friends. I don't know even know WHY their perception of her even matters. Who the fuck are these people anyway?!? Petty little bitch.

And lastly, she is such a snobby, condescending bitch. She thinks she's SUCH hot shit. She constantly talks of how she married "below her" and anytime he "fucks up," she dismisses us a la "and your children are just like you." Bitch, unfortunately, we're YOUR children too. Unbelievable. She really thinks she's hot shit. Like of a higher class. A good example is when she was actually admitted into the mental hospital for getting drunk one time and being suicidal. When she was there, rather than focusing on getting better, the only thing that came to her mind was "These people are freaks. I don't belong among them. I have to get out of here." She thought she was above them. She was released in the week after, I suppose, telling them what was necessary to hear. She was still suicidal upon release though. I was actually pretty concerned. But it's just so fucking unbelievable that's she's such a stuck-up, snobby cunt and she acted that way.

And lastly lastly, she's very self-conscious and has anxiety of her own to deal with. Social anxiety to be more specific (She never even said a word at my sister's wedding. My father wrote a speech SHE wrote with her standing behind him). This inhibits her from really interacting with people on a more than superficial level. The direct family is the only one who sees her for the nasty person she really is. SO, it's like, she's never challenged. She stays cut off in her own, comfortable little bubble and her misconceptions and bullshit ideas are never challenged. Just the way her lazy ass likes it. Unbelievable. I think she's hopeless...or at least not worth helping.

There was a time in our lives when she had a benign brain tumor and there was a "scare" of going under the knife to have it removed. I wish she died then. She was nothing but miserable before then and EVEN MORE afterwards. As a kid, I'd often hear her saying how she wished she was dead and other bitter, miserable shit. Can you imagine hearing that shit as a kid?!? Why would you say that in front of your children?!? Fuck, I wish the bitch got her wish. Some people don't deserve life.

My father, in short, shouldn't even be included as a person. Certainly not as a man. He is so pathetic. He does EVERYTHING my mother tells him to...and yet she still bitches he never listens to her! Pfft. He is such a freak in his own regard. I think the best fitting example of his character would be from a time when I was a young teenager. I was being stupid and was climbing on the banister/ stair railing in the basement one day and happened to break it. For some reason, I thought it would be for the best if I were honest and candid and decided to tell my father. He IMMEDIATELY went away and told my mother. Fucking idiot. She freaked the fuck out! Started kicking and stomping on me (at least 20 times) into a corner and honestly, that didn't hurt too much...until she grabbed a knife and threatened to stab me with it and I figured THAT would have hurt a lot more. That's when the sick bastard probably felt I got a good enough thrashing and no more was needed and decided to intervene and grabbed the knife from her. I'll admit, I may or may not have lost some control of my urinary sphincter. Anyway, I felt at odds with my mother some time after that (she did apologize the next day. Oh you know, for going batshit and flirting with being homicidal with a knife. No biggie, k?), but it only dawned on me after some more time how fucked up what my father did was. All this shit happened around the same time after she had that operation and was in recovery and my sister was giving some distress with a troublesome relationship. So she was under more than usual stress. So WHY THE FUCK did he tell her?!? It was a relatively easy fix and we could have gone to Home Depot discreetly and fixed the fucking thing with her being none the wiser. But NO, the bastard had to tell her. Fucking bastard. Could he have been THAT fucking stupid, nutless and incompetent of a father and husband to put us both through that ordeal or did he secretly enjoy the shitshow? Bastard must have had a fucking chubby. Fucking freaks. They're actually pretty stupidly religious too. I once asked the bastard why we wasted so much time doing certain pointless, bullshit mindless chores around the house on the weekend and the freak actually responded with "So we won't be tempted to sin." Are you fucking kidding me?!? Who the fuck says that?!? Who the fuck still lives like that?!? This isn't the Victorian Age!

Goddammit, I think I hate them. I must have used the words bastard, kunt, bitch several times over lol. I wanted this to be a discussion, but it turned into more of a rant lol. Fuck.

Anyway, currently, I decided I needed some space and decided to stay at a hotel/motel indefinitely. It's been about a month away now and...it feels pretty good. To be out of that crackhouse. Fuck, I hate them. The bitch is already guilt-tripping and trying to manipulate me. Making semi-threats of moving back to the city because I'm not there anymore and wondering what to do with my collection of books in my room (leave them there ya fucktard!) and asking if I know anyone who wants a goldfish because apparently she is just SO fucking retarded and incompetent in not being able to remember to feed a fucking goldfish. It's almost amusing if it weren't so fucking frustrating. And, it's like she wants to keep me back in the house. She keeps saying how I'm wasting money and it's going down the drain and it's not "smart." Yeah, maybe not "financially smart" but continuing to live with them would be pretty fucking intellectually/emotionally retarded. Damn, after all this time, I still don't know how to talk/handle this bitch. She is undoubtedly THE most frustrating person I've ever faced in my life. My own motherfucking fucking mother. What a life.

Anyway, how batshit are your parents?

 

[k75]

I know I'm in the minority, but my parents are actually great. We struggle sometimes, but overall our relationship is good and they try their best to understand what I'm going through. I'm really lucky.

 

[mediocre]

My parents are pretty normal. I wish they were batshit maybe then I could have ctb years ago.

 

[Despondent]

I hate my parents lmao

 

[HannahB]

My father was abusive and ended up in prison for it. My mom... doesnt really exist. Shes a shell with bo personality that does whatever her husband says. She doesnt have a favorite color or a hobby she never did anything with us camping sledding fireworks she skipped it all. My stepdad was a racist asshole from Tennessee who would say things like 'wow you look like a faggot today' and had the worst punishments. Like one time I had to cut our acre lawn with scissors and a ruler. Then one day I stood up to them and said this hurts me what your doing hurts me and he didnt care that's when they emancipated me.

 

[Nnana]

Dad was awful. Abusive, rude , violent. Even though I was a very good kid he was still abusive physically and verbally. He doesn't care about his kids, so we have grown apart. But mother is ok. If I had a bad mother, then killing myself would have been easier.

 

[Squiddy]

My parents are pretty great. We get into arguments sometimes, but still love each other

 

[lofistos345]

Mom is a Borderline Personality psychiatric book example and my dad is a psychopath of the worst kind, he is very smart and ruthless.

 

[UninformedLover]

My mom is the absolute worse. Throughout my entire childhood (and now) she would physically and emotionally abuse me and neglect me at times. As a child she would constantly hurt my feelings and call me names when I did something bad or made her angry (which would be no fault of mine.)

For whatever reason my mom was a real short tempered person and would take out on me. When I misbehaved (or did anything she didn't like) she would hit me, punch me, push me throw things at me...We even got into literal fights. One time as a kid she berated me and slammed my head into a microwave all because I bought a coat she didn't like. Another time she bludgeoned me with a box of chocolates I got from school (all because she didn't understand why I still got a box of chocolates even though she paid the fundraiser fee.)

She's kicked me out the house numerous times. As a child she would call me clown feet and I ended up developing a fear of shoe shopping. Since then she has also turned into a gas lighter and even more neglectful. I feel as if I'm going insane. I already have a bad memory as it is and her gas lighting only makes it worse. She never listens to anything I have to say. The disinterest hurts me a great deal. Sometimes I am confused because even though my mom subjected me to such abhorrent behavior there was also plenty of times she was nice to me,did good things for me and bought me things. I feel a bit guilty.

My dad is significantly better but at times he can be a nuisance.

 

[Moonicide]

My father is extremely abusive both verbally, physically, and emotionally. He is a male chauvinist, hates women. Loves to degrade and sexualize them, etc. Believes you should respect him no matter what he does, because he is a 'man.' Like if the devil exists, he is it. 100%. He is the main reason why I am so fucked up.

My mother is also a victim of abuse and also has abusive traits due to it, but she is honestly, the lesser evil. She tries her best to not repeat the behaviors in the past that had inflicted trauma and pain to me. But for the most part, my mother would be the emotionally abusive one. Lashing out, being emotionally abusive, gaslighting, manipulative, extremely anxious and paranoid. She is one of the main reasons why I suffer from anxiety, because she never knows how to relax and would never let me figure things out for myself while growing up.

Very stunted, sheltered, and damaged.
Living in fear was very much amplified by them. Still am living in fear.

 

[WirriumDank]

Father was an abusive piece of shit, mother was originally a wonderful and loving woman until my dad broke her. She then became a complete narcissist and loved to degrade me but occasionally her old personality came through.

 

[BPD Barbie]

Let's open this can of worms so my biological father, I don't really know so I grew up with my step father. He came into my life when I was 2. He had his girls taken off him after reports of sexual abuse from the girls. When my mum met him, he seemed OK. Ended up abusing me, my mum knew, sided with him and said I encouraged it and if I didn't dress a certain way that I wouldn't have been abused. I was a young teenager. There was also physical and mental abuse. They weren't model parents, we get on better now but it's forced.

 

[Final Escape]

My mother had some combo of borderline and narcissistic personality disorder. She destroyed me and I couldn't develop normally and of course I have arrested development as a result. My father was a womanizer narcissist. He really was not that attractive I don't know what my mom saw in him. Probably because they were both cluster B's they were drawn to each other. I didn't know my father I just saw that he had kids by multiple women and I saw his facial expression in pictures, plus my mother talked about how weird he behaved. He was psychologically abusive to her. Yea I shoulda never have been born, or at least given up for adoption to a stable sane two parent family. My parents should have been sterilized after being evaluated as to wether they are capable parents.

 

[Empty Smile]

My parents were pretty normal and let us kids be kids. They were strict, but not so strict that I couldn't fart without their permission. If we misbehaved, we got our asses beat. But other than that, it was a pretty normal life growing up. So I don't have any complaints about my parents.

 

[JustAnotherSuicider]

Although I know that they always wonted all the best for me it's hard for me not to blame them for who I am now.

My mother was always too protective and treat my like child, and she still does it. She didn't allowed me to go out with friends because she was worried, and now she is surprised that I have no friend and spending all day in home in front of computer.

My father never appreciate my accomplishments and no matter what I did it was always wrong and not enough for him. I tried my best to have good grades in school, but it always was not good enough for him, he never said to me that I did a good job. He was shouting after every parents meeting in school and I was very scared of him. Thanks to that now I have zero self esteem and no motivation to do anything at all.

 

[PartingGlass]

They're good people, I just wish they had aborted me.

 

[Mr2005]

Useless

 

[LuzurPhagget]

My father was abusive and ended up in prison for it. My mom... doesnt really exist. Shes a shell with bo personality that does whatever her husband says. She doesnt have a favorite color or a hobby she never did anything with us camping sledding fireworks she skipped it all. My stepdad was a racist asshole from Tennessee who would say things like 'wow you look like a faggot today' and had the worst punishments. Like one time I had to cut our acre lawn with scissors and a ruler. Then one day I stood up to them and said this hurts me what your doing hurts me and he didnt care that's when they emancipated me.

Wow, there are interesting parallels. Except my father was the shell and my mother was the crazy one who ended up in a mental institute lol. I'm sure you're better off without them.

My parents are pretty great. We get into arguments sometimes, but still love each other

My mom is the absolute worse. Throughout my entire childhood (and now) she would physically and emotionally abuse me and neglect me at times. As a child she would constantly hurt my feelings and call me names when I did something bad or made her angry (which would be no fault of mine.)

For whatever reason my mom was a real short tempered person and would take out on me. When I misbehaved (or did anything she didn't like) she would hit me, punch me, push me throw things at me...We even got into literal fights. One time as a kid she berated me and slammed my head into a microwave all because I bought a coat she didn't like. Another time she bludgeoned me with a box of chocolates I got from school (all because she didn't understand why I still got a box of chocolates even though she paid the fundraiser fee.)

She's kicked me out the house numerous times. As a child she would call me clown feet and I ended up developing a fear of shoe shopping. Since then she has also turned into a gas lighter and even more neglectful. I feel as if I'm going insane. I already have a bad memory as it is and her gas lighting only makes it worse. She never listens to anything I have to say. The disinterest hurts me a great deal. Sometimes I am confused because even though my mom subjected me to such abhorrent behavior there was also plenty of times she was nice to me,did good things for me and bought me things. I feel a bit guilty.

My dad is significantly better but at times he can be a nuisance.

My mom is the absolute worse. Throughout my entire childhood (and now) she would physically and emotionally abuse me and neglect me at times. As a child she would constantly hurt my feelings and call me names when I did something bad or made her angry (which would be no fault of mine.)

For whatever reason my mom was a real short tempered person and would take out on me. When I misbehaved (or did anything she didn't like) she would hit me, punch me, push me throw things at me...We even got into literal fights. One time as a kid she berated me and slammed my head into a microwave all because I bought a coat she didn't like. Another time she bludgeoned me with a box of chocolates I got from school (all because she didn't understand why I still got a box of chocolates even though she paid the fundraiser fee.)

She's kicked me out the house numerous times. As a child she would call me clown feet and I ended up developing a fear of shoe shopping. Since then she has also turned into a gas lighter and even more neglectful. I feel as if I'm going insane. I already have a bad memory as it is and her gas lighting only makes it worse. She never listens to anything I have to say. The disinterest hurts me a great deal. Sometimes I am confused because even though my mom subjected me to such abhorrent behavior there was also plenty of times she was nice to me,did good things for me and bought me things. I feel a bit guilty.

My dad is significantly better but at times he can be a nuisance.

Holy fuck. I would strongly advise you to GTF away from your mother. Nobody should have to deal with that shit. And as for YOU feeling guilty for "not appreciating" all the "good" things she's done, that's bullshit. In that sense, she could be like MY mother and only have done those "good" deeds as a way of alleviating some kind of deep-seated guilt she must feel for being such a shitty mother. DON'T indulge her in that. It just enables her shitty behaviour even further and keeps the cycle going. If you can, just cut her out of your life.

My father is extremely abusive both verbally, physically, and emotionally. He is a male chauvinist, hates women. Loves to degrade and sexualize them, etc. Believes you should respect him no matter what he does, because he is a 'man.' Like if the devil exists, he is it. 100%. He is the main reason why I am so fucked up.

My mother is also a victim of abuse and also has abusive traits due to it, but she is honestly, the lesser evil. She tries her best to not repeat the behaviors in the past that had inflicted trauma and pain to me. But for the most part, my mother would be the emotionally abusive one. Lashing out, being emotionally abusive, gaslighting, manipulative, extremely anxious and paranoid. She is one of the main reasons why I suffer from anxiety, because she never knows how to relax and would never let me figure things out for myself while growing up.

Very stunted, sheltered, and damaged.
Living in fear was very much amplified by them. Still am living in fear.

Damn, it sucks when they project all that shit onto you. I'm starting to realize now just HOW MUCH of an impact on my mental health those freaks inflicted on me. There was no real joy experienced (probably attributed to my depression) and always an air of negativity, pessimism and doubt (attributed to my anxiety). And now that I've sort of taken a step towards independence, she's kind of lashing out and being passive aggressive. Trying to instill fear in me about how I'll get by without their help and that I don't know shit and that I'm not appreciating all the "good" things they've done for me. Jesus Christ. I don't know if she's genuinely concerned about my well-being or if she's just that much of nasty kunt and just doesn't want to see me happy. Or at least would prefer her being "right" for the wrong reasons over my own happiness.

Although I know that they always wonted all the best for me it's hard for me not to blame them for who I am now.

My mother was always too protective and treat my like child, and she still does it. She didn't allowed me to go out with friends because she was worried, and now she is surprised that I have no friend and spending all day in home in front of computer.

My father never appreciate my accomplishments and no matter what I did it was always wrong and not enough for him. I tried my best to have good grades in school, but it always was not good enough for him, he never said to me that I did a good job. He was shouting after every parents meeting in school and I was very scared of him. Thanks to that now I have zero self esteem and no motivation to do anything at all.

Oh, that reminds me. When I just finished my last year of high school, I had recently discovered the simple joy of riding my bike. Mind you, I would have been 18 later that year and most kids my age were concentrating on driving a fucking car lol. Anyway, I lived pretty much my entire high school in an anxious state. I barely left the house, due to pretty bad social anxiety, except to go to school and church. I barely even had a wardrobe since we wore uniforms at school. Anyway, so it was pretty much the end of high school and it was summer time and I was FINALLY going out (albeit on a fucking bike, but going out nonetheless). I didn't really have any particular place to go except to the library to get comic books. My fucking kunt mother made even THIS difficult. I remember she would look at the clock and be like, "ok, you're going out at 5, be back by 9." Like, it didn't matter I was staying out too late lest I be attacked by dangerous people, just that she wanted to limit how much time I spent outside. During the summer. At the end of high school. When most kids were focused on exploring the greater world and moving onto bigger things. After SO many years of being trapped inside. Fukking goddamn her. It was just a control thing for her. One time, she actually gave me shit for coming back home just a few minutes BEFORE my curfew "Oh, you try to stay out as late as possible, huh?" No duh bitch, my curfew's only till 9, numbnuts. She even accused me of selling/peddling drugs. Un-fucking believable. All I was doing was riding my bike to go to the library to get fucking comic books. Fukking kunt.
For what it's worth, shitty parents can beget non-shitty, actually good kids. And conversely, good parents can have really shitty kids. lol. It's funny. The important thing is, I guess, we don't HAVE to be them. Maybe we can be better. I feel like, in a weird, perverse way, as parents are suppose to be role models/ people to learn from, my parents have shown me all the things I wish NOT to be lol. In a way, they kind of "trained" me.

 

[LuzurPhagget]

My parents are pretty great. We get into arguments sometimes, but still love each other

Ha, look what I found at Hot Topic. Never been in there before and was looking for this forever. Can't wait to try it on.

 

[Squiddy]

Ha, look what I found at Hot Topic. Never been in there before and was looking for this forever. Can't wait to try it on.

I need one of those

 

[MysticPerception]

My father was a very kind man who loved his children despite being separated from them. His funeral was absolutely maxed out with people. I will never not be impressed by how many friends that man had and how confident and charismatic he was. He suffered a lot before he died due to diabetes so at least his suffering is over. His death seriously fucked me up though, it made me want to CTB so much more knowing he really is gone and I can't see him again. My mother is still alive and I moved back in with her because she was lonely. I'm extremely grateful to my mother as she loves me with all of her heart and just wants me to be happy. She's done everything right as far as being a mother as far as I'm concerned. Which is a shame because the guilt of probably causing her to completely shut down and lose the will to live after I CTB is one of the things that makes me hesitate. All in all it just goes to show that even having amazing parents doesn't stop you from wanting to die. I guess I'm infinitely less messed up and have no mental illnesses unlike other people so that's the upside. But I still want to end it all as soon as I can.

 

[Rosiel]

My parents as people are great, and they are good as parents for the most part and supported and pushed me towards academic achievement, which to them is the most important. They often acted as a unit and I never really saw them argue, often it's me against them lol. They raised me in the best way they can, and gave me everything they could. I grew up in a wealthy household and my mum took care of me full time. But there is always a catch...

Up until I was 9 years old, I thought my family was completely normal and it turns out my mum is my dad's beloved, kept mistress . This caused problems when my dad passed away back in 2010 when the official family, led by my vengeful, much older half brother (who is a high functioning borderline and has deep-seated anger issues towards me and my dad) decided to strip me off my rightful inheritance (I lost millions of pounds). Everything went sort of downhill from there as I was unprepared to face the real world. I did well academically alright, but no street smarts in terms of how to be really financially independent!

I am fortunate that I don't suffer from any mental issues, but major stressors happening at the same time (financial problems, my mum getting cancer, my marriage falling apart, career going nowhere, business venture not going anywhere, horrible dating experiences and being in debt) led me to feel like such a hopeless failure. These, and my tendency to be interested in the spiritual/existential/dark topics led me to have the philosophy that life is like a game so you can always press quit and leave. You don't have to deal with the whole bullshit and so-called lemons if you don't want to .

 

[mathieu]

My mum is normal and couldn't have been a better parent. Dad has a lot of issues. They divorced when I was ten and I mostly lived with my mum after that. I get along with both of them now. I couldn't live with dad, that never worked. I live alone.

 

[porfin1234]

My mom was extremely sweet, caring, did everything for everyone, and coddled the hell out of me and my sibling. When she did try to discipline which was hardly ever, my dad would not back her up and would just say "we are just kids". Although I do remember when we moved from Venezuela when I was a kid to the US I would refuse to go to school due to anxiety and my dad would get extremely angry with me and my mom had a hard time forcing me to go.
My mom alsohad serious mental health issues and attempted suicide a few times. She was extremely depressed and apparently told a friend of hers who had cancer that she felt bad for her but that her depression was so bad she wanted to be dead. Well, she ended up dying in a car accident at 50. Then came the guilt tripping from my aunt that we treated my mom like shit and that we made her miserable.

my dad... horrible temper although it's gotten better after my mom died and he got into Buddhism. He's very much about just enjoying your life and screw taking things seriously.

i remember resenting then for not disciplining me and my sister more, although at 33 I really have no excuse at this point.

i am blessed to have had them.

 

[Pallf]

My parents are good people. I have normal issues with them, but I don't think they're the reason I want (or wanted) to ctb.
I'm very sorry for all the folks on here who have shitty-ass parents. No one deserves to be abused and/or neglected by their parents.

 

[Starcitty]

Both had completely different personalities yet both were equally abusive. They don't like how quiet I am and constantly complain about it, and at times I feel like they don't like me. Wish they never met so I wasn't conceived or wish they gave me up to actually loving adoptive parents. What makes it worse is that they're divorced so they always complained about each other and me. They both made me realize how truly negative people can be and they might've been the reason I gained depression in the first place.

 

[enjoy]

dad: neglectful asshole who compensates in materialistic "love".

mom: emotionally and verbally abusive piece of shit who gaslights anyone that gets within three feet of her. she used to physically abuse me until i got bigger than her and kicked her ass out of self-defense at, like, 15 or 16. she's either got bpd like me or is a narcissist. hell, maybe she's both. batshit fucking crazy.

i don't like my parents at all.

 

[zeroambition]

My mother is very supportive and understanding. I can comfortably talk to her about absolutely anything. I showed her my self harm scars a few months ago and told her my plan to ctb when she passes away.

 

[JustVisiting]

Toxic, narcissistic, emotional abusers. My mother gave me to the state system at age 4. Then attempted to be a parent when I was an adult. No way. NO CONTACT.

 

[bath salts]

My mom is emotionally dependant on me, a total narcissist and gaslighter, and to top it all off - a child abuser. Bleh. Dad's worse - raped and hit me and now calls it part of the past. I've always been insanely envious of people with good parents and in the past have gotten too emotionally attached to my friends parents and other adult figures in my early teens. Have an intense distrust for authority figures because of my parents as well lol. Fuck them.