E
esistzeit
Member
- Jul 17, 2024
- 6
My departure is scheduled to some 40 days from now. That's when I will have all the ingredients at hand and the results of a final attempt at life.
What am I to do during this time? Everything feels so meaningless.
P
Just because I plan on dying doesn't mean I'm suddenly struck with a bolt of newfound courage. I still don't want to go out or talk to anyone or risk injury/pain doing daring stuff.
There is also this annoying, tiny little thing called "hope" that just won't let me go crazy. I could spend the rest of my days indulging in all sorts of vices, but that would lead to damage which I would regret, should my last attempt work out.
Additionally, everything done abundantly and repeatedly becomes boring quickly. If I were to binge watch my favorite show I'd get sick of it after the first couple of days.
What to do? What to do?
Any suggestions?
What am I to do during this time? Everything feels so meaningless.
P
Just because I plan on dying doesn't mean I'm suddenly struck with a bolt of newfound courage. I still don't want to go out or talk to anyone or risk injury/pain doing daring stuff.
There is also this annoying, tiny little thing called "hope" that just won't let me go crazy. I could spend the rest of my days indulging in all sorts of vices, but that would lead to damage which I would regret, should my last attempt work out.
Additionally, everything done abundantly and repeatedly becomes boring quickly. If I were to binge watch my favorite show I'd get sick of it after the first couple of days.
What to do? What to do?
![Thinking face :thinking: š¤](https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f914.png)