Discussion What makes you live another day?

[resteasy3232]

For me, it's been my family. I had a relatively good childhood and didn't face many challenges while growing up, but I always struggled with feelings of depression. I believe the only reason I'm still here today is because of their support.

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

As Camus put it, "the body shrinks from annihilation. We get into the habit of living before acquiring the habit of thinking."

 

[CatLvr]

My kids. And my pets.

 

[resteasy3232]

My kids. And my pets.

Heavy on the pets, i cant imagine leaving my cat

 

[Pryras]

My mother. We don't have a good relationship but the guilt of causing her pain that she will take to her grave is hard to get over.

 

[resteasy3232]

My mother. We don't have a good relationship but the guilt of causing her pain that she will take to her grave is hard to get over.

Totally understand, i've also thought the same for a while now lol. itll always be hard for us

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I just can't kms now. It's not too bad.

My mom is still alive, there's family, there's some hope that it could get better long-term.

 

[resteasy3232]

I just can't kms now. It's not too bad.

My mom is still alive, there's family, there's some hope that it could get better long-term.

I hope the best for you, and thats great to hear that its not bad right now. youre really strong

 

[darkest]

Waiting for the right conditions ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

 

[divinemistress36]

To depressed and scared to plan sn yet

 

[CatLvr]

To depressed and scared to plan sn yet

Ohhhhh! This hurts me. You are such a sweet person. I would be so sad to see you go, but I hate that you hurt like this.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

There is no reason to live another day another minute. There never was .

The only reason I keep living Is fear of failing a suicide attempt and remaining alive with brain damage. I didn't ask to be here . I don't want to be here

I don't see an objective reason why I have to live or to have to want to live another minute. Or to do anything except kill myself

 

[Unknown21]

I don't even care about my death, my mind is in a state of paralysis, apathy and laziness make me not even want to get out of bed, I want to sleep all the time. My date was supposed to be this month but with this situation it looks like I'll have to postpone it again.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Obligation. I don't want it to upset my Dad. I suspect fear will hold me back eventually too but I so hope I will overcome it.

 

[FuneralCry]

Because I cannot just have the option to simply die in peace and never suffer ever again, to me there's just so much cruelty in how there's no acceptance towards wanting to permanently not exist instead of suffering in this existence I always saw as so cruel and futile, personally I'd be long gone if I could just die painlessly but of course the suffering just continues instead. I'd never wish for the burden of human existence rather it just feels like a terrible mistake to me, also what I'd fear is trying to die going wrong and leading to way worse agony, it's horrific to me how humans cannot just choose to be euthanised even know there is literally no limit as to how much agony one can feel in this existence that was imposed in the first place that just leads to decay and death anyway.

 

[Scorpio moon gal]

having no way to die painlessly is a reason I'm still here

 

[four_walls_girl]

Need to be skinny before I ctb, wanna go on some final family holidays where I'm finally thin enough for a bikini, plus other trips wearing outfits and styles I never got to wear as a teen. I'm not letting myself make it to 25 still fat, I refuse to. But also knowing me I'll never be able to keep it up for long. I feel 25 is a good cut off point anyways, halfway between still young and "proper" adult at 30 (at least how I see it lol)

 

[arandomname]

Waiting for the one I love. Losing them would likely kick off my plans to ctb.

 

[Thisisnotaname]

Weather.
Not cold enough to be sure to be alone

 

[blackbeauty]

a part of me is clinging on to the hope that my life will get better and a part of me is scared of the unknown.

 

[leavingsoonx]

Waiting for my SN. Until then I'm an alcoholic working out chain smoking shell of a person. There's peace in it knowing it will end relatively soon, even if it's not as soon as I want. I also have the bullies who want me to die and I'm putting large smiles on their faces every time. The bullies get a good life, I get suicide. Game over

 

[Kimmi.rikudotnet]

I think for me, it's the fear of the attempt.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Laziness, selfishness, take your pick.

 

[tbh2023]

I have bipolar issues so today I want to live.

 

[OldManOfTheLake]

I have to make a phone call tonight. The result of that conversation will determine if I CTB or not.

 

[outrider567]

I wouldn't call it living

 

[dontlook]

I stay for my partner. Sometimes I don't know if I can. I love her more than anything

I have to make a phone call tonight. The result of that conversation will determine if I CTB or not.

Can I ask the nature of the call?

 

[TinyGuy]

SI and feeling guilty for making ppl feel bad

 

[nihilistic_dragon]

The hope that some day soon I will finally have the guts to embark on my journey to go look for N and ctb. There is nothing else to live for, just that one final trip.

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

I'm a coward and crippled with depression. I can barely function.