It can feel debilitating when you have depression for a long time and, I fear for some people it never does fully lift. Given how many suicidal and depressed people are like this from a young age, I truly believe its just how some of us are. I can't tell you how many times I read of someone bragging that they beat depression, only to later ctb. Meds, therapists, inspiration gurus may all help for some people but not all.