Website cancelled by SN order

[butterfly3]

They cancelled my order and are refunding me because they said it's a restricted item and I'm so upset. I had the worst day yesterday and I was so deeply depressed and suicidal.

Then, today I woke up from the most horrible dream that I've ever had, it was honestly traumatising, and it brought up touchy memories from my childhood. The fact that I had SN on the way was comforting, especially because they said it would come in less than a week which is so soon. But now they've cancelled it and I don't know what to do.

I've already told my parents that i'm dropping out of school because it's too stressful and I'm planning on ctb soon anyway. (I'm in my last year of sixth form in the uk)
Now I'm gonna have to wait for my money to be refunded and find another website. I just cant deal with this. Why couldn't they have told me that they cant sell it to me instead of taking my money and then cancelling the order and wasting my time.

Maybe I'll just have to go with a painful method like drowning, because it seems like all the less painful methods are too difficult to get.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry that you are going through this. It is such a cruel world we live in, where people are denied ways to end their suffering. The right to die should always be respected and people should not have to resort to painful methods. I know that this life can be unbearable when you are suffering so much. I hope you find relief from your pain in whatever happens.

 

[Famous Last Words]

Wow, last year of sixth form. So you've just turned 18?

I remember A' levels being really stressful too. You know you could always retake the year if it's too much?

 

[butterfly3]

Wow, last year of sixth form. So you've just turned 18?

I remember A' levels being really stressful too. You know you could always retake the year if it's too much?

Yeah I just turned 18, and I don't think I could deal with retaking tbh. I cannot do this again. I know it sounds dramatic but I'd genuinely rather die, especially because school isn't the only reason why I wanna ctb, it just makes it worse

 

[Famous Last Words]

Yeah I just turned 18, and I don't think I could deal with retaking tbh. I cannot do this again. I know it sounds dramatic but I'd genuinely rather die, especially because school isn't the only reason why I wanna ctb, it just makes it worse

You know, there are so many other options available if that's not the route you want to take. Going to university isn't the right choice for everyone.

What are your parents like? Are they loving and supportive of you or are they part of the problem?

 

[Shu]

Was it DD?
I thought in a different thread you said you canceled the order on your own?

 

[butterfly3]

Was it DD?
I thought in a different thread you said you canceled the order on your own?

I cancelled one order because I got scared. Then I bought it again on a different website because this time I was actually ready, but then they cancelled it themselves this time. I really shouldn't have cancelled the original one

 

[Then_Tomorrow_4099]

sorry to hear that.