Want to CTB tonight. Limited resources. Much agony.

[Busridin'26]

I don't want to live another night but I feel stuck. Even with a plan or some idea of making drowning a lil less agonizing I'm still uncertain of the details.

Im just sobbing rn bc its so painful to be ready to go and yet stuck. I force myself to live knowing the consequences of not living while alive. But I just can't anymore. I dunno what to do.

Ig I better keep looking up methods that can be done woth little materials and such and get it together and just execute.

I can't handle this anymore

 

[Dayrain]

bc its so painful to be ready to go and yet stuck.

Absolutely!

 

[wheezle42]

Looks like you're going through some really hard times :( Suffering is what we know, alive yet dead.

About drowning, don't take this as bullet proof advice or anything, but I knew someone who went through (our equivalent) of navy seals training. They drown you and revive you during an exercise of sorts. He said after the initial physical reaction, it was the most peaceful thing he's ever experienced. He wished to die drowning after that day.

Whatever you do, get help or go through, I hope things get better for you <3

P.S. "get help" lol, someone else will have to fill you in on that cuz all my own attempts have been failures

 

[jajajamielee]

Looks like you're going through some really hard times :( Suffering is what we know, alive yet dead.

About drowning, don't take this as bullet proof advice or anything, but I knew someone who went through (our equivalent) of navy seals training. They drown you and revive you during an exercise of sorts. He said after the initial physical reaction, it was the most peaceful thing he's ever experienced. He wished to die drowning after that day.

Whatever you do, get help or go through, I hope things get better for you <3

P.S. "get help" lol, someone else will have to fill you in on that cuz all my own attempts have been failures

I'd never want to die of drowning, because even though I want my death to be painful, I've never wanted to die in a way that asphyxiates you, that kind of death sounds so awful to me for some reason.

 

[wheezle42]

I'd never want to die of drowning, because even though I want my death to be painful, I've never wanted to die in a way that asphyxiates you, that kind of death sounds so awful to me for some reason.

Yeah I hear you, I feel the same way. But that's what he said, always made me curious.

 

[STTP]

Yeah I hear you, I feel the same way. But that's what he said, always made me curious.

Keep in mind that iirc it's better to do in freshwater and SWD - I've heard about how the asphyxiation can be painful otherwise since it will really mess up your throat, but I can't confirm that. Something about your lungs filling with blood first in saltwater. Idk, though, chemistry and firearms are my thing.

 

[Dying Knight]

Yeah I hear you, I feel the same way. But that's what he said, always made me curious.

I understand what he meant. The unpleasant feelings go away after some time, the last seconds before passing out you feel yourself like in a half dream. I can tell this because I've reached this stage too. And I saw articles that describe a similar experience of other people.