Walking in circles

[LonelyPrince]

I'm trying. I really am.
But it takes nothing
Nothing.
To make all the effort just feel futile.
I don't even understand what am I living for.

It's comforting to be monitored more closely by a psychiatrist instead of being ghosted or underestimated by doctors. But I feel like...it won't actually lead anywhere?

I feel slightly better but is it really because or the meds? Are they actually doing anything?

I'm useless and I just hurt people despite not wanting to. Desire leads to pain.

Me desiring something always hurts someone else.
Me desiring someone always hurts someone else

I'm just walking in circles.

 

[timf]

Me desiring something always hurts someone else.
Me desiring someone always hurts someone else

The Buddhists see in desire that which needs to be conquered in human life. Some Christians see a difference between desire for self versus desire for the good of others. It might be that a change of focus could help such as doing volunteer work that focuses on helping others.