Viewing my own death in third person

[littlelungs]

I've been trying to desensitize myself to my own eventual suicide by compiling a bunch of pictures that could be used at my memorial (if anyone even gives enough of a rats ass to give me one), writing my obituary in third person, etc. Almost looking at it from an outside perspective as if I'm already dead, if that makes sense.

Have any of you done anything similar? It feels morbid but equally comforting.

 

[starcrossedfate]

Yeah, I imagine myself as like a really, really depressed Sim constantly crying, shitting, and pissing all over the floor; barely functional.

 

[Denise]

I've been trying to desensitize myself to my own eventual suicide by compiling a bunch of pictures that could be used at my memorial (if anyone even gives enough of a rats ass to give me one), writing my obituary in third person, etc. Almost looking at it from an outside perspective as if I'm already dead, if that makes sense.

Have any of you done anything similar? It feels morbid but equally comforting.

I haven't. But I've written out instructions about what to do if I die and at times it gave me a sense of peace and control but at times it made me cry.

 

[Wolfjob_dayjob]

With the amount of people that bump into my body or step on my heels day to day, I believe I'm already dead, just a shadow walking and I'm the only and last mourner to my own death.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

I find that too depressing, not even from a death perspective, just the fact that I am so isolated and know practically nobody. My few family members are scattered around the world. So there would be no funeral or whatever if it were up to me, because it's better to have zero mourners than like three. This will suit me just fine:

 

[sadak_the_wanderer]

I find this idea useful for planning. "Who will get rid of his things?"

 

[TAW122]

I actually have that idea for my suicide note, I would write in third person, talk in future tense to condemn the people who are responsible for the shit I'm in, the people who made ALL of our lives full of suffering (pro-lifers who keep pushing anti-suicide and pro-life rhetoric), but also commend those that have been helpful as well as celebrate the good things.

In reality, I will be dead after I do it so I wouldn't be able to see their reactions or experience anything afterwards (I'm an atheist so I don't believe in an afterlife). The least I could do is to leave some condolences for the ones I care about and are good for me, while getting my last comeuppance against the people who have hurt me or made things difficult. I'm not sure what impact I will have if any, but I guess it's better to have something immortalized or be part of a long term change in policy, laws, culture, etc., if possible.

 

[Paulsmith]

I've only really done one of those. Just really a suicide note

 

[Xerxes]

No note, everyone should already know why, but if not, then they didn't care enough.

 

[TiredHorse]

Reams and reams of notes and logistical instructions have helped steady me in some ways, but no, I haven't used the technique Littlelungs describes. In the last month I've gotten so that I can't look at myself in the mirror, and I think that might translate to photos, too.

 

[52shriek]

I find this idea useful for planning. "Who will get rid of his things?"

This is weirdly the most upsetting part for me. I'm actually having major anxiety over it rn. It's almost like I feel more distressed over "upsetting my things" than anybody else, if that makes any sense. I'm gonna make them homeless, and objects that are highly sentimental to me will end up being thrown away unceremoniously, I just can't get over it.

Strangely, I'm more at peace with whatever obituary whoever will come up with.

 

[TiredHorse]

This is weirdly the most upsetting part for me. I'm actually having major anxiety over it rn. It's almost like I feel more distressed over "upsetting my things" than anybody else, if that makes any sense. I'm gonna make them homeless, and objects that are highly sentimental to me will end up being thrown away unceremoniously, I just can't get over it.

Me too! I might be an atheist, but I have a perversely animist attitude to my belongings. Who will take care of them? Who will cherish them as I did? It at times drives me to tears.

 

[52shriek]

Yes... It's driving me to tears as I type, in fact. Then on top of being horribly depressed and racked with anxiety, I feel extra pathetic for forcing myself to live just because I'm distressed over hurting the imaginary feelings of inanimate objects. Which sends me into deeper depression.

 

[TiredHorse]

Yes... It's driving me to tears as I type, in fact. Then on top of being horribly depressed and racked with anxiety, I feel extra pathetic for forcing myself to live just because I'm distressed over hurting the imaginary feelings of inanimate objects. Which sends me into deeper depression.

Exactly.

Who will wind the living room clock, my old friend? It'll wind down and stop if I'm not here! Just because I want to wind down doesn't mean it does...!

Really? Yes, I'm pathetic.

 

[52shriek]

Ha, if it was in any way realistic, I'd offer to take care of your things and ask you to take care of mine but obviously there's a massive flaw in that idea ;)

 

[52shriek]

Ha, if it was in any way realistic, I'd offer to take care of your things and ask you to take care of mine but obviously there's a massive flaw in that idea ;)

I won't though, no worries, I was just pointing out the irony of the situation.
But thoughts of my possessions seriously mess me up for real. I can't look into my stuffed animals' eyes when I'm thinking of ctb. I'm 40, with a college degree. I'm pathetic.

 

[TiredHorse]

Yes, that idea is flawed --but compassionate, and I thank you for the sentiment.

I'm 49, and I'm in the same boat as you. Yes, we're both pathetic.

 

[Xerxes]

I fantasize about my own death in the 3rd person, but I see myself walking away from my husk, and then drift away back to the realm of nothingness. I think visually and surrealistically. Maybe that's my creative perception on how I like to go out. Just dont want to be here any longer than I have to.

 

[Rocky M]

I've been trying to desensitize myself to my own eventual suicide by compiling a bunch of pictures that could be used at my memorial (if anyone even gives enough of a rats ass to give me one), writing my obituary in third person, etc. Almost looking at it from an outside perspective as if I'm already dead, if that makes sense.

Have any of you done anything similar? It feels morbid but equally comforting.

I've often imagined myself getting run over (particularly by a black Mitsubishi RVR), but that's about it

 

[Roph]

I have a secret Facebook Album called "My Death" with a bunch of pictures... and I wrote a brief obituary in the third person.