Simba

Simba

Missunderstood Potato
Dec 9, 2018
750
I wasn't sure where to post this but it's not really happy for off topic and i had bad thoughts when this happened so if this doesn't belong here let me know !

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So I like this guy that also likes me back which makes me so fucking happy. But ,for instance yesterday.. It was after 00:00AM and i just wanted to call him for a short while just to hear his voice so i did ,and then mammy calls me from her room and basically saying like "the nerve!" she said it in hebrew idk which word would describe it in English.. and it made me really upset it hurted me the way she said it too ,but i started to get really bad thoughts at that moment of wanting to kill myself ,that no one cares about me ,no one loves me etc and i had tears coming out my eyes but it was silent.

So this morning comes ,and she's like "it's not ok what you did last night " and I said that I'm sorry and after she went to work she called me and telling me how i go overboard to extremes and how he (the guy i like) must think that she's an awful bitch.. she said it's always about what i want..

It hurts me so much i feel like sometimes I'm like 2 different people and it sucks.. I feel like i have to be this "good girl" for my parents even tho I'm 26 years old. It makes me sad. Even this week when i went to his moms apartment and mammy got a bit mad that I'm not leaving when she says. It's not fair this is my life i should be able to live how i choose :( God forbid i actually like someone that likes me back and then this šŸ˜ž
 
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