Bunni'sLullaby
iterum occurremus ultra saturni circulis
- Dec 3, 2023
- 33
I almost pulled into the parking lot of the local gun store today, just to see if I could do it. When I got ready to turn, I couldn't. A mix of it was the heavy traffic (so f*** trying to making a left-hand turn), but I also started to deal with a PTSD trigger because it is the same place my husband bought his gun before CBT'ing.
I'm considering a .357 magnum because I've heard it "cuts through a human like butter," but I've been recommended a Ruger LCR .38 special +p revolver (38SPL, 1.875" SPL) because it has a similar power to a .357 but less recoil and whatnot. I'm not worried about the price. I was going to call and ask how much they charged for it, but I got a small amount of life insurance. So, if I was going to CBT, it wouldn't really matter in the end (and I know they cost a couple hundred to a thousand+).
I would prefer SN or N (as it's more or less the "gold standard" compared to SN) to reduce anyone finding a gruesome mess like I experienced with my husband. But, if that doesn't become available, a firearm is the best bet: thanks, USA. (Which, once I gain account maturity/ability to direct message, please show mercy and provide a source lol).
I know not to shoot under the chin, but I can't bring myself to shoot through the mouth. With that, it's best to shoot through the ear or in a specific place behind the ear to hit the brainstem, considering I would rather not risk just sitting there in more misery than I already am or regretting my choice. I'd rather just get past SI and guilt (considering) and be done. Once I'm gone, what is guilt going to matter?
Anyways, I've read through the forums, even before joining. So, this has probably been answered before, but: is there a place to feel behind the ear to know where the brainstem would generally be? I hope this makes sense. I know there's a bump of bone behind the ear. Would someone need to hit this spot as close as possible or through the ear to hit the brainstem? If you had to shoot through the ear, how much would this hurt? The pain is the scariest part, aside from SI and guilt. I don't want to f*** up. I read on here that recoil wouldn't really be an issue by the time the bullet exited, but I want to make sure this works if I move past semi-planning. I wrote out goodbye letters a few months ago, considering my husband didn't. So, I couldn't bear to leave with nothing; that's worse. But, I've thought about re-writing them several times to include important information (e.g., my "wishes," contacts like life insurance and so on).
I'm considering a .357 magnum because I've heard it "cuts through a human like butter," but I've been recommended a Ruger LCR .38 special +p revolver (38SPL, 1.875" SPL) because it has a similar power to a .357 but less recoil and whatnot. I'm not worried about the price. I was going to call and ask how much they charged for it, but I got a small amount of life insurance. So, if I was going to CBT, it wouldn't really matter in the end (and I know they cost a couple hundred to a thousand+).
I would prefer SN or N (as it's more or less the "gold standard" compared to SN) to reduce anyone finding a gruesome mess like I experienced with my husband. But, if that doesn't become available, a firearm is the best bet: thanks, USA. (Which, once I gain account maturity/ability to direct message, please show mercy and provide a source lol).
I know not to shoot under the chin, but I can't bring myself to shoot through the mouth. With that, it's best to shoot through the ear or in a specific place behind the ear to hit the brainstem, considering I would rather not risk just sitting there in more misery than I already am or regretting my choice. I'd rather just get past SI and guilt (considering) and be done. Once I'm gone, what is guilt going to matter?
Anyways, I've read through the forums, even before joining. So, this has probably been answered before, but: is there a place to feel behind the ear to know where the brainstem would generally be? I hope this makes sense. I know there's a bump of bone behind the ear. Would someone need to hit this spot as close as possible or through the ear to hit the brainstem? If you had to shoot through the ear, how much would this hurt? The pain is the scariest part, aside from SI and guilt. I don't want to f*** up. I read on here that recoil wouldn't really be an issue by the time the bullet exited, but I want to make sure this works if I move past semi-planning. I wrote out goodbye letters a few months ago, considering my husband didn't. So, I couldn't bear to leave with nothing; that's worse. But, I've thought about re-writing them several times to include important information (e.g., my "wishes," contacts like life insurance and so on).
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