jellie
Student
- May 9, 2023
- 106
I am FWB with a man who has broken up with me twice and who I am still in love with.
As I fall further into this spiral of wanting to CBT I crave him. I crave his touch. I want him to hold my hand and hug me, to cuddle with me, and to hold me while I cry into his chest as he pets my hair. I want so badly to be loved by him in the way that I love him. I love him so harshly and fervently with my entire heart that it hurts and leaves me with nothing.
recently i have felt his hesitation when i grab his hand to hold. I have noticed his reluctance to kiss me. the only time he touches me is when he wants to have sex. I love the sex and it feels good but there is a distance between us. it is rough and cold. I am a kinky person and oftentimes I do enjoy this kind of sex. However, I wish he would kiss me and hold me close and have sex with me passionately and lovingly. outside of sex I wish he would initiate innocent forms of touch. I wish he would hold my hand, i wish he would hug me, i wish he would even just playfully bump into me as we walk next to each other. i just want to be touched lovingly. It feels like he is only using me for sex.
i feel like i physically can't get over him and i don't think that I can go no contact with him. but he is driving me insane. i just wish so badly that he loved me.
As I fall further into this spiral of wanting to CBT I crave him. I crave his touch. I want him to hold my hand and hug me, to cuddle with me, and to hold me while I cry into his chest as he pets my hair. I want so badly to be loved by him in the way that I love him. I love him so harshly and fervently with my entire heart that it hurts and leaves me with nothing.
recently i have felt his hesitation when i grab his hand to hold. I have noticed his reluctance to kiss me. the only time he touches me is when he wants to have sex. I love the sex and it feels good but there is a distance between us. it is rough and cold. I am a kinky person and oftentimes I do enjoy this kind of sex. However, I wish he would kiss me and hold me close and have sex with me passionately and lovingly. outside of sex I wish he would initiate innocent forms of touch. I wish he would hold my hand, i wish he would hug me, i wish he would even just playfully bump into me as we walk next to each other. i just want to be touched lovingly. It feels like he is only using me for sex.
i feel like i physically can't get over him and i don't think that I can go no contact with him. but he is driving me insane. i just wish so badly that he loved me.
