I have (very strongly) felt this way in the past as well. You sound very selfless. Just the fact that you thought of switching with someone else means you deserve help. I hope things go well.
I'm sorry to hear you've felt the same way.
I just wish I could absorb everyone else's pain, yaknow?
Hey there, cath55555. I'm sorry to hear that this person you care about is not getting the support they deserve. So many people don't these days, and it's a travesty. If you had to guess, what kind of support do you think they actually need?
And for that matter, what kind of support do you think you need? I can't help but wonder why you'd think you're undeserving of it.
my friend attempted about a month before I did. 3 times in the same month. I care for him so much, I really do. I only attempted one time (not my first time, but my first within the last year or so). I just feel as though he would deserve the help more- he's a good person, he's got a young son, he has people in his life. I just feel like he would deserve the help more. he isn't getting any because the NHS screwed up I think. he needs it, he has people who want him to get it. I'm just... yeah. I don't deserve any of the good things that have come from this. the compassion, the appointment, the care. I suffer with bulimia. have done for the past... 7 years now, jesus christ, 7 years is my niece. anyway- I'm bulimic. they'll want me to stop puking, but if it's not puking, I'll do something that to them will seem worse. to me? peaceful. but yeah. I'm a horrible person, not in the exaggerated sense- I'm a bitch, I'm really mean to people whether it's in my head or... whether I argue. I'm honestly not enjoying life right now. haven't for a long fucking time. I am disgusting. I wish so fucking much that I could take all of the pain my friends, my family, literally every single person on earth feels, I wish I could absorb it and implode. I just want my friends to be happy. wishes never do seem to come true.
