kitkatt
Possumpwincess
- Feb 17, 2026
- 75
This is a vent I wrote very early this morning after a cptsd episode was triggered after eating to many mushrooms 
I'm okay I just feel weak and my head hurts but I'm trying to take care of myself gently today so I can go back into work tomorrow. I wish I weren't traumatized this shit is really lame. But I wanted to share to get it out and make myself feel better ;(
athroom like a dog
I was a pet to them
And unfortunately I was not loved I want to hate them all I want their miserable lives to be wrought with the same agony I must endure but i don't I wish the world hadn't hurt them so much that they would create life only to fail me in every capacity.
I killed my accidentally for a bit tonight
I took shrooms because I wanted to feel happy
Well ouchie tummy hurt from eating poisonous fungi because well duh
So lots of puking an general not feel good let to me having a cptsd episode where I was like cool I'll try to be positive and even though this sucks I'll do my best to work through it while panicking I remember I'm cold and want to be held and I've heard showering fully clothed on mushrooms does feel like being held. Well I did my best to use it to work through some pent up feelings and roll around slimy and wet like a slug till I finally worked myself out enough to be tired. Well here's where I accidentally killed myself for a bit. In that moment of wanting comfort and bringing clothes and towels wet and fucked up into the tub allows water to pool and you are fucked up and have been practicing holding your breath with drugs and also I just wanna learn voice control to I can scream properly into the void and well I dozed off still conscious but I remembered needing to tell my roommate I'm okay because I promised to not die In the house and I pulled my out from in inches of water I'd passed out in. It's not my first time dying for a bit and maybe that's why I've always wanted to die because I was an oopsie and my hot goth puss having wife called death wants me back. I don't know everything's so hard dying is so easy for me that I'll do it accidentally but I just want a connection I want to love people and I'm trying to undo how I was created but I don't know how I want to better I want to feel better I want to stop being burdened with knowing
So there's my feel better vent about nothing matters and I wish I didn't love my friends so much because fuck that was a good accidental set up and I always feel bad so I can't say for sure whether it hurt (and I was having a meltdown so big ouchie trauma feeling) the losing consciousness and all that no pain just felt like being super tired so tired you can't keep your eyes open lol but I was also foaming at the mouth a bit and very mucus'y due to the mushrooms so I think that prevented and accidental aspiration of gross bath water but oh well. I wanted to type it out but while im freaking out typing gets so hard and then tripping on top makes it extra hard to find the keys
I'm okay I just feel weak and my head hurts but I'm trying to take care of myself gently today so I can go back into work tomorrow. I wish I weren't traumatized this shit is really lame. But I wanted to share to get it out and make myself feel better ;( athroom like a dog
I was a pet to them
And unfortunately I was not loved I want to hate them all I want their miserable lives to be wrought with the same agony I must endure but i don't I wish the world hadn't hurt them so much that they would create life only to fail me in every capacity.
I killed my accidentally for a bit tonight
I took shrooms because I wanted to feel happy
Well ouchie tummy hurt from eating poisonous fungi because well duh
So lots of puking an general not feel good let to me having a cptsd episode where I was like cool I'll try to be positive and even though this sucks I'll do my best to work through it while panicking I remember I'm cold and want to be held and I've heard showering fully clothed on mushrooms does feel like being held. Well I did my best to use it to work through some pent up feelings and roll around slimy and wet like a slug till I finally worked myself out enough to be tired. Well here's where I accidentally killed myself for a bit. In that moment of wanting comfort and bringing clothes and towels wet and fucked up into the tub allows water to pool and you are fucked up and have been practicing holding your breath with drugs and also I just wanna learn voice control to I can scream properly into the void and well I dozed off still conscious but I remembered needing to tell my roommate I'm okay because I promised to not die In the house and I pulled my out from in inches of water I'd passed out in. It's not my first time dying for a bit and maybe that's why I've always wanted to die because I was an oopsie and my hot goth puss having wife called death wants me back. I don't know everything's so hard dying is so easy for me that I'll do it accidentally but I just want a connection I want to love people and I'm trying to undo how I was created but I don't know how I want to better I want to feel better I want to stop being burdened with knowing
So there's my feel better vent about nothing matters and I wish I didn't love my friends so much because fuck that was a good accidental set up and I always feel bad so I can't say for sure whether it hurt (and I was having a meltdown so big ouchie trauma feeling) the losing consciousness and all that no pain just felt like being super tired so tired you can't keep your eyes open lol but I was also foaming at the mouth a bit and very mucus'y due to the mushrooms so I think that prevented and accidental aspiration of gross bath water but oh well. I wanted to type it out but while im freaking out typing gets so hard and then tripping on top makes it extra hard to find the keys
