tried

[raiseurweapon]

i feel sick, something happened not too long ago that really triggered something in me. i dont want to be specific but i struggle with severe isolation. dont get me wrong i still go places and go outside and such but my life is mostly online. i turn 20 soon and i can just feel the pressure on me. it sucks because its a struggle just to wake up every morning and yet im expected to be happy, outgoing and make money. be happy. i cant. i never saw myself living this long and now reality is setting in. im not a 13 year old girl anymore. but i still mentally feel young. anyways, last night i decided to take a handful of sleeping pills. they were prescribed to my mom to help her when she had bad insomnia so i was aware of their presence and i knew my mom didnt want me near them bc she would hide them from me. but i saw them, everything went blank and i just kept thinking. "itll be over if i do" and i did it. but as the night progressed i panicked on how they'd find me and how nobody would take care of my animals. my family wouldnt take care of my pets as they stated before if i died. i vomited most (maybe all?) of them up not even an hour after. im so sad, i feel stuck. and i really dont want to be alive. i wish i didnt care about what everyone would think of me because im supposedly doing so much better! i just dont want to hurt anyone but i am so fucking miserable and im not even 20. i really hope a miracle happens at this point
im so sick of being who i am and im sick of the constantly miserable feeling.

i dunno what to do

 

[FuneralCry]

I don't really think that sleeping pills are a reliable suicide method but anyway it's very much understandable feeling so tired of being trapped here, there certainly is no real relief from suffering in this cruel world. But anyway I wish you the best.

 

[raiseurweapon]

I don't really think that sleeping pills are a reliable suicide method but anyway it's very much understandable feeling so tired of being trapped here, there certainly is no real relief from suffering in this cruel world. But anyway I wish you the best.

yeahhhhh learned that the hard way. but thank you so much. you too!

 

[Eyris]

there are many websites that people are on that can take care of the animals and they don't send them to the pound or anything of the sort. I would do more research on more reliable CTB methods because you dont want to end up with severe brain damage or things like the sort due to lack of knowledge. and i really wish you the best on what ever you decide to do